Somebody Loves You

Guest (Male): But how great it is when a man gets up in the morning and he prays and he reads the Bible and he studies God's word, prepares himself spiritually and then the Lord allows him to be baptized with the Holy Spirit, making decisions under the power of the Holy Spirit. Those are the characteristics of a godly man.

Guest (Male): Welcome to Somebody Loves You Radio, the Bible teaching ministry of Raul Ries in Diamond Bar, California. Well, we are beginning a new series today exploring the unique responsibilities and blessings of Christian fathers. Guiding your family in godliness can feel daunting, but Raul will show you that the key is to nurture your own relationship with the Lord.

Keep listening to Somebody Loves You Radio to see that when you fill your spirit with biblical truth and commune with God in prayer, his wisdom and strength will direct your ways. In Deuteronomy chapter four, beginning in verse nine, here is Raul Ries with our study: The Responsibility of a Father.

Raul Ries: And what I want to do this morning is I want to give you a message to all the men that are here: the responsibilities that you have as a father, especially one that has become a man of God. One that has not only given his life to the Lord, but then how God will begin to speak to your heart in your responsibilities, what you're supposed to do.

I want to take you back into the Old Testament, give you some Hebrew history, and then give you the lesson this morning concerning those of you that are fathers and grandfathers. In the book of Deuteronomy, if you have your Bible with me, turn there with me. The book of Deuteronomy, chapter four.

Now, the book of Deuteronomy is an interesting book because Moses wrote it, and he wrote it in a 30-day period. He wrote Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and then Deuteronomy. He wrote it in 30 days as he was coming to the end of his life. It is believed that the last two chapters of the book of Deuteronomy were completed not by Moses because he died, but by Joshua.

And there in the book of Deuteronomy, what Moses does is he sums up everything that God spoke about in Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, and the book of Numbers. But the way he concentrates in the book of Deuteronomy, when he uses the word to listen a hundred times, is because he concentrates on this whole thing that God not only wants to bless Israel as a nation, but also there are dangers for the nation if they're not careful to obey the commands of the Lord.

And if they begin to actually gather together with those heathen nations that are paganistic and idolatrous, that their doom will come and the judgment of God will come upon them. But then, in God speaking to the nation of Israel, he speaks to the family too.

And he shares with them the importance of teaching their children the word of God. In Deuteronomy chapter four, verse nine, he says, "Only take heed to yourself and diligently keep yourself, lest you forget the things your eyes have seen and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life," speaking to fathers. "And teach them to your children and to your grandchildren." Interesting, from generation to generation.

Now, how do we become a godly father in an ungodly generation? That's a really good question. How do we, as fathers, become not only godly, but responsible to the call of God that he's placed in our own lives as men of God? We know today there are many problems with fathers that do not want to take this responsibility, the responsibility for their homes, the responsibility for their families, the responsibility of working.

And yet, in Hebrew history, when you go back and you study the Jews in their history, in the Jewish household, it was very closely knit in social, religious, and economics and organization with the family. Very close-knit together. The Hebrew home also had other very important functions like this: the family was the only educational institution for the training of their children into the time of Christ.

So from Genesis all the way to the book of Malachi, God spoke of the responsibility of the parents, especially the father being the leader of his home. In the book of Proverbs 13:24, it says that the father has a responsibility to correct his child. He says, "He who spares his rod hates his child, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly." Promptly.

Let me give you this morning ten responsibilities that a father has to have in his life. Ten responsibilities. Very important. Number one, it is of importance that the first responsibility is for a father that he has to become a man of God. He has to be born again of the Holy Spirit.

And an ungodly man cannot fulfill this. This is only for Christians, only for those that become Christians. That is when a father realizes that he has sinned against God and that he needs to come to know God in his life because he sees his family drawing away, being rejected. His home is a mess. His life is a mess.

And he needs to come to that place of repentance and asking Jesus Christ to come into his heart and to forgive him. And that wife's going to have to be patient to see whether that true commitment to God is real or not and allow God to work in his life and that he can grow so that he can become that godly leader in the home. Very important. It doesn't happen overnight; it takes time.

But he has to be born again. When Jesus was talking to Nicodemus, that old man, he said, "Nicodemus, you can't go to heaven unless you're born again of the Holy Spirit." That's the first thing you have to do. You have to come to Jesus Christ and know him as your personal Lord and Savior. That's really important.

Secondly, once you become a Christian—listen carefully, men—you need to become the leader in your home in prayer. In prayer. You need to pray with your wife. You need to pray with your children. They need to see you in times of silence by yourself instead of sitting in front of that television tube or doing anything else that is keeping you from getting on your knees before God to pray for your children, to pray for your wife, to pray for your home, and to pray for your job.

Really important that you come to that place. It's good for men to humble themselves in the presence of their children. As a matter of fact, in Matthew chapter seven, verse seven, Jesus said on the Sermon on the Mount, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and it will be opened unto you." That's in the present tense of the Greek.

Literally, it reads like this in the Greek text: "Please keep asking me and it will be given to you. Please keep seeking and you will find. Please keep knocking and it will be opened unto you." God is waiting for you, man, to come and to ask and to seek and to knock. Very important that men are born again of the Holy Spirit and they become men of prayer, praying for the circumstances and situations that you're facing today in your own life.

Or maybe your marriage is on the rocks as a Christian. You need to pray. It's not convincing your wife to come back to you or convincing your wife that she shouldn't leave or that your wife should not do anything about it. But you know what? You take it to the Lord and you wait on God to work in your marriage. The first thing that has to change is you, not your wife. Not anybody else. You are the problem, and you need to take care of the problem, and that is by coming to God on your knees.

And yet, at the same time, there are men that do this. There are men that are getting up in the morning and coming home at night and praying with their wives and praying with their children, going into the room before the children go to bed and praying with them in their bedrooms for guidance, for wisdom, for knowledge, for protection. All these things are important, men.

And then thirdly, a man has to be spirit-filled. You have to be spirit-filled all the days of your life. You need the Holy Spirit's power. You can't function without it. If you're not baptized with the Holy Spirit, if you're not filled with the Holy Spirit every morning when you leave your home, you forget that there's a battle out there when you go to work. There's a battle going on all the time.

But how great it is when a man gets up in the morning and he prays and he reads the Bible and he studies God's word, prepares himself spiritually and then the Lord allows him to be baptized with the Holy Spirit, making decisions under the power of the Holy Spirit. Those are the characteristics of a godly man. A man that is born again, a man of prayer, a man that is baptized with the Holy Spirit.

In Ephesians chapter 5:18, it says, "Do not be drunk with wine anymore, but be filled with the Holy Spirit." God desires that you would have power when temptation comes, when trials of life come, when you have to make decisions, thinking clearly by the power of the Holy Spirit. Clearly.

And then fourthly, a man needs to fall in love with his God. To fall in love with your God more than your wife, more than your children. The reason I say that is because Jesus said, "If you love your father, your brother, your sister, your son, your daughter more than me, you're not worthy of me." God has to be first. Number one. Because when you really, truly are submitted to the lordship of Jesus Christ and you really love God, you're going to love your wife, you're going to love your children, and you're going to love everybody else. God will take care of business.

But the problem is there are so many men that are not in love with God. That's why they commit adultery. That's why they lie. That's why they cheat. That's why they're not home. They're trying to make the mighty dollar more than anything else. It's sad. And I understand that you have to make a living, but when it becomes your god, then it's wrong. Then it's wrong. Why? Because your family suffers. Your wife suffers, your children suffer, you will suffer. Satan knows what he's doing. But if you're in love with Jesus Christ, you're in love with God, God will set your priorities in order. In order to be able to work and to be with your children, to be with your wife, and to have balance in your life as a man of God.

Guest (Male): You are listening to Somebody Loves You Radio with Raul Ries. Visit somebodylovesyou.com to take advantage of our full range of faith-building resources. You can also join Raul for straight talk on the Somebody Loves You Worldwide YouTube channel Tuesdays at 10 a.m. West Coast time. Now back to more with Raul Ries.

Raul Ries: In Matthew chapter 22:37, 38, Jesus said, he said, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind. This is the first and most important great commandment: to love God, to love God with all your being."

And then fifthly, this one really is important: to love your wife. To love your wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it. Sometimes husbands can be really rude with their wives, very rash and very harsh. Sometimes husbands verbally, physically abuse their wives in front of their children. That's not good, especially if you're a Christian. God's not pleased with you.

But how blessed it is when a husband comes home and instead of sitting in front of the tube, he comes in and says, "Honey, can I help you in any way?" Loves her and cares for her because she's been all day long with the children, with baby talk, and you can communicate with her. She wants to talk to somebody that's an adult. And maybe the laundry or the dishes, whatever it may be, and you say, "Well, you know, I've been working all day." But you know what? Sacrificially, you help. You help, and God will be pleased with you. And your wife will love you for it. You're a team. You're not two, you're one. Whatever she feels, you should feel.

And yet, here in Ephesians chapter five, Jesus said to the husband, "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her." Are you giving yourself for her sacrificially? Are you dying to yourself? Because it's really easy for men to escape. "I'm going to go to my friends. See you later. I'm going to watch a football game, watch a baseball game, or whatever it is. I'm going to go play golf or whatever it is." Nothing wrong with that. But if you're always doing that and neglecting your wife and your children, you are in the wrong. You're in sin, my friends. You're in sin before God. You should not be doing that. You should be sensitive to your wife and to your children's needs.

But that comes through true love. When you really love that person, because when you love somebody, you sacrifice for that person. That's what love's about.

And then sixth, you have to be protective of your wife. Your wife can come under attack by the enemy, by Satan. If you haven't been praying for her and meeting her spiritual needs, she can really get destroyed by Satan. All day long watching the children, the screaming, the yelling, changing of diapers, or maybe taking the kids to school, bringing them back from school. Maybe they're teenagers and they're getting in trouble and teachers are calling and you're getting reports. And here's your wife; she doesn't know what to do because you're not doing anything about it. You need to step in as a spiritual leader and protect your wife. Be spirit-filled men. Be the leader. Take care of business. You see?

Because in the Old Testament, in the book of Malachi chapter 2:14 and 15, the Jews also were doing what people do today, what men do today. Their wives—they married these wives, their wives got older and they were not as beautiful as they used to be. They got out of shape. So what did they do? They left their wives and went after younger wives. Oh, that happens today. Women neglected, cast off by their husbands because they found somebody else.

God says that's a no-no. Because when you get married, it's for what? Until death do us part. So help me God, no matter what. What God says in the Old Testament, he says to us today in Malachi 2:14, "Yet you say, 'For what reason?' Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously. Yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant." By covenant. You cannot break God's covenant. God gave her to you for life.

Verse 15: "But did he not make them one, having a remnant of the spirit? And why one? He seeks a godly offspring. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let no one deal treacherously with the wife of his youth." Don't get rid of your wife. Lift her up. Pray with her. Love her. Help her. You see? If you have a problem with her, help her. Talk to her. Come together in an agreement. Very important.

Seventh, he has to be faithful to his wife. This is a real problem today. You're having problems at home with your wife, then you go to the office or wherever you go and you find somebody else that you can talk to and they agree with you. And they tell you their problems and you tell them their problems and sooner or later, here you are in bed together committing adultery. Happens all the time. Be careful.

In Proverbs chapter 5:18, 19, he says, "Let your fountain, husbands, be blessed and rejoice with the wife of your youth." Notice how many times he says it again. "As a loving deer, a graceful doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times and always be enraptured with her love." You say, "Well, what about if my wife doesn't love me anymore?" Then work on your marriage. It takes work in a marriage. Give God time. It's important that you work on your marriage; it doesn't happen supernaturally. You got to work on it. You got to take the measures that God gives to us and use those measures to go ahead and improve on your marriage.

And then eighth, he has to teach his wife. What do you mean teach? In the New Testament, when Paul the apostle was in the synagogue and the women would sit on one side, the men on the other side, the women would say, "Honey, what is the rabbi saying about this issue?" And so the rabbi taught, and Paul says, "When you guys go home, husbands, make sure you take the time to sit down with your wives and to explain to them what the word of God says about the issue." You see? Husbands, you need to spend time with your wives reading the scriptures to them, praying with them, instructing them as a spiritual leader. Because if you're not doing that—remember, God sees everything, God hears everything—you're only lying to yourself. You're only deceiving one person: you. Nobody else.

That's why in 1 Corinthians 14:34, 35, he said, "Let your women keep silent in the churches." All the men said amen, but that's not what it says. You see? Men always love that scripture. Let's read the rest of it. "For they are not permitted to speak, but they are to be submissive as the law also says. And if they want to learn something, let them ask their husbands at home, for it is a shameful thing for a woman to speak in church." That was confusion. A woman can speak in church; a woman can communicate. What he's talking about is the confusion it was bringing as a wife would get up and say, "Hey honey, what does he mean by that?" That brought confusion. Keep silent, listen to the sermon, then go home and discuss it. Teach your wife what the sermon's about so you can both grow together. That's what he's talking about.

Number nine, a husband has to honor his wife. Don't disrespect your wife in public. Don't disrespect your wife in secret. Don't shame her, don't put her down, don't mistreat her. You say, "What do you mean?" Well, listen to Peter. 1 Peter 3:7, "Husbands, likewise, dwell with your wives with understanding." Understanding, you have to be patient. "Giving honor to the wife as to the weaker vessel." Notice what he says, she is what? The weaker vessel. "As being heirs together of the grace of life, that if you don't respect her, if you don't have understanding for her, you mistreat her, guess what happens? Your prayers will not be answered until you get it together." He says, "That your prayers may not be hindered." What hinders your prayers? Mistreating your wife. Not being kind and loving to her. That's where you go wrong.

Guest (Male): We hope it's been reassuring to learn that when you spend regular time with the Lord, he'll help you effectively serve as the spiritual leader of your home. You're listening to Somebody Loves You Radio with Raul Ries. Today's study was titled The Responsibility of a Father. To get an unedited version, just call us at 800-634-9165 and for a donation of $5 or more, we'll send a copy to you.

Now, to further build your confidence, we'd like to tell you about Raul's six-part father's series. Featuring today's lesson as well as five others, this resource is available on both CD and USB. As you think about the Bible's instructions for dads, you'll find motivation to follow Jesus' example of servant leadership. You'll also learn about the blessings that come from grounding your home in God's word. Visit somebodylovesyou.com or call 800-634-9165 to order Raul's six-message study for fathers.

We'll send you the CD set for $19 or the thumb drive for just $10. The number once again is 800-634-9165. Or write to Somebody Loves You Radio, Post Office Box 4440, Diamond Bar, California, 91765. Check us out on iTunes and Spotify to get podcasts of all previously aired programs. You'll also find these podcasts on the Somebody Loves You Worldwide YouTube channel and for live-streamed Bible teaching and digital Bible studies, download the Somebody Loves You app.

Your partnership enables us to keep sharing the good news of Jesus with the world, and every gift is tax-deductible. Next time on Somebody Loves You Radio, we'll continue this father's series with more encouragement to prioritize your personal devotion time, establishing spiritual credibility in your children's eyes. Now with a closing thought, here's Raul once again.

Raul Ries: Ten and lastly, this is really important: if a wife doesn't have to work, she should stay home with the children. You should be the sole provider even if you have to sacrifice because of the children. You are to be the sole provider of your home. I know things have changed, but this is what the Bible teaches. Very important.

You want a bigger house? Get a smaller house. Downsize, if it takes that for your children to have their mother at home. Very important. Why? Because they need their mother and they need their daddy providing for their needs. Very important. You see, because if you don't take care of the needs of the home financially, this is what he says: "But if anyone does not provide for his own house, especially for those in his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." The husband is ordered to go to work and to provide for the needs of the wife and the children. That's what the Bible teaches. You want to argue? Argue with Jesus. Don't argue with us; argue with the Lord.

Very important fathers, men of the church today, that you give yourself to integrity. Give yourself to the Lord. Make sure that your heart is right before the Lord because God wants to do a great work in you and in your family if you will submit to the lordship of Jesus Christ.