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The Gift of Space
By Aubrey Way

During a heavy, stressful season of work a few years ago, I began experiencing back pain. Assuming I'd slept on it wrong, I went about normal life, impatiently waiting for the pain to disappear.

Months before, I’d made plans with our city’s ultimate frisbee team to travel across the country and play in a tournament. As the tournament drew closer, the pain remained and I wasn't sure I'd be able to play. But with tickets already purchased, I decided to go anyway.

At the time, our kids were 5 and 2. A weekend away was no small thing. And the weekend was the only time I could give my wife a much-needed (and deserved) break.

Yet she graciously forwent this break in order to give me the space to leave town and play a game for two days.

Surprisingly (to me), the long hours of strenuous activity at this tournament did not result in soreness, exhaustion, and further injury (well, there was a little soreness). Instead, I experienced my stress melting away and my back being totally restored.

I hadn't realized my back pain was stress-induced. Without the chance to step away, I wonder how long it would've taken me to make that connection—and what kind of physiological, mental, and emotional consequences I would have faced as a result.

In freeing me up to step away for a bit, my wife put my interests above her own. She thought she was making a sacrifice for the sake of something fun but frivolous, but God used it to accomplish something necessary and restorative.

Read more on how to support your spouse’s mental health.

The Good Stuff: Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Philippians 2:4)

Action Points: Could your spouse use a break? Think of one chore or activity you can take off their plate this week to give them space to rest.

I Do Every Day Let’s Go Vertical! prayer guide

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FamilyLife Today® is an award-winning podcast featuring fun, engaging conversations that help families grow together with Jesus while pursuing the relationships that matter most. Hosted by Dave and Ann Wilson, new episodes air every Tuesday and Thursday.

About Dave and Ann Wilson

Dave and Ann Wilson are co-hosts of FamilyLife Today©, FamilyLife’s nationally-syndicated radio program.

Dave and Ann have been married for more than 40 years and have spent the last 35 teaching and mentoring couples and parents across the country. They have been featured speakers at FamilyLife’s Weekend to Remember® since 1993, and have also hosted their own marriage conferences across the country.

Dave and Ann helped plant Kensington Community Church in Detroit, Michigan where they served together in ministry for more than three decades, wrapping up their time at Kensington in 2020.

The Wilsons are the creative force behind DVD teaching series Rock Your Marriage and The Survival Guide To Parenting, as well as authors of the recently released books Vertical Marriage (Zondervan, 2019) and No Perfect Parents (Zondervan, 2021).

Dave is a graduate of the International School of Theology, where he received a Master of Divinity degree. A Ball State University Hall of Fame Quarterback, Dave served the Detroit Lions as Chaplain for thirty-three years. Ann attended the University of Kentucky. She has been active with Dave in ministry as a speaker, writer, small group leader, and mentor to countless women.

The Wilsons live in the Detroit area. They have three grown sons, CJ, Austin, and Cody, three daughters-in-law, and a growing number of grandchildren.

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