Should Everyone Experience a Breakup?: Episode 777
December 22, 2022
Expressing your faith on social media and in person, plus more from Tim Challies on processing grief, and should a breakup be part of your story?
Featured musical artist: Abandon
Roundtable: Living Your Faith Online and IRL
As Christians, our identity is in Christ, so there’s no way we can separate our faith from who we are and what we do. As such, our faith is reflected in everything, including our interactions with others. As we consider how we show up in relationships — whether real or virtual — what should that look like? How do we set the tone, language, actions and reactions to everything we communicate? Our panelists talk through ways they’re learning to be open about their faith, whether face-to-face or via a post, meme or Reel. Listen in as they share how to glorify God and share the love of Christ through our communication and conversations.
Culture: Grief When You Least Expect It (Part 2)
On November 3, 2020, Tim Challies got the call every parent dreads — his 20-year-old son, Nick, had died unexpectedly while away at college. As the grief and shock hit and then continued in waves, Tim found incredible comfort in grieving through the seasons of the following year by writing out his thoughts and emotions. In part two of our conversation, Tim discusses the spring and summer seasons after Nick’s passing — including what should have been Nick’s wedding day — and shares hard-won peace in keeping an eternal perspective on the days we are given.
Seasons of Sorrow: The Pain of Loss and the Comfort of God
Inbox: Is a Breakup Necessary for Relationship Success?
We all know someone who’s gone through a breakup; in fact, most people experience one before they ever meet their mate. But our listener is wondering: Is a breakup a necessary part of the dating process? She’s reluctant to date because of the pain she’s seen breakups cause her friends. Lisa Anderson weighs in.
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Christmas shopping on a budget, plus blogger Tim Challies on processing grief, and appropriate age gaps for dating.Featured musical artist: Ecclesia Roundtable: A Budget-Conscious ChristmasAre you still trying to finish your Christmas shopping? You’re not the only one. And with inflation and other financial pressures, gift-giving this year can seem more of a burden than a blessing. But what if truly meaningful gifts aren’t always the most expensive ones? Our panel shares ideas for fun and creative Christmas gifts and activities that will still leave money in your pocket.Culture: Grief When You Least Expect It (Part 1) On November 3, 2020, Tim Challies got the call every parent dreads — his 20-year-old son, Nick, had died unexpectedly while away at college. As the grief and shock hit and then continued in waves, Tim found incredible comfort in grieving through the seasons of the following year by writing out his thoughts and emotions. In part one of our conversation, Tim talks about the early days after receiving the tragic news, how he wrestled with God’s sovereignty amid the intense grief, and what helped him get through the dark days of that fall and winter.Inbox: Appropriate Age Gaps in DatingMany of us know a couple where the man and woman are several years (or more) apart in age. At what point does an age gap become too weird or problematic? Is there a formula for figuring out how to view age differences for relational success? Lisa Anderson weighs in. Get the book "Seasons of Sorrow: The Pain of Loss and the Comfort of God " for your donation of any amount! 4 Things to Consider When Dating With an Age DifferenceWhat to Ask When There’s an Age Difference
December 15, 2022
Are you a planner or more spontaneous? Plus, five instincts of masculinity, and is it normal to be regularly annoyed at your boyfriend?Featured musical artist: Hollyn Roundtable: Structure or Spontaneity? While some people map out their daily routines, others prefer to be more “off the cuff” and ready for anything. Each tendency has strengths and weaknesses. Our panelists share their unique approaches to life, how they both maximize and guard their temperaments, and how they flex to accommodate those who are different.Culture: 5 Masculine Instincts and What They MeanWhat does it mean to embrace godly masculinity? Pastor Chase Replogle has written “The 5 Masculine Instincts” to explore this topic. Listen in as he and Lisa break down the manifestations of sarcasm, adventure, ambition, reputation and apathy in men — how they are not necessarily sinful, yet how they can go awry. Most importantly, Chase will show us what it looks like to submit each instinct to the Lord.Get the book "The 5 Masculine Instincts: A Guide to Becoming a Better Man" for your donation of any amount: https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-12-08?refcd=1587405Inbox: She’s Annoyed With Her BoyfriendShe and her boyfriend have been together for almost two years, yet she finds herself regularly annoyed at him. Is this normal? Her friends tell her that annoyances get worse once you get married. Counselor Elaine Humphries weighs in.
December 8, 2022
Honoring people of different generations, plus going eyes wide open into marriage, and what if your parents don’t like your significant other?Featured musical artist: Kerrie RobertsRoundtable: Showing Honor to Other GenerationsGen X, Baby Boomers, Gen Z and Millennials. Every generation is distinctive, each with its unique perspectives, habits, and cultural references. Is it possible for these generations to learn from each other and even — wait for it — get along? Members of four generations sit at the table this week to discuss the hallmarks of their own “tribe” but also to approach work, relationships, communication and more with generational differences (not to mention humility) in mind.Culture: Preparing for an Honest MarriageNobody walks into marriage perfectly prepared. Whether it’s baggage, misconceptions, pride or all three, all married couples must confront their brokenness if their relationship is to survive. With decades of pre-marital counseling experience and wisdom from his 40-plus-year marriage, Bob Lepine has mentored a wide variety of couples with an even wider scope of issues. He’ll offer insights on how to approach marriage with your eyes and heart open, and how to make the most important things the main things both before and after tying the knot.Build a Stronger Marriage: The Path to Oneness (Ask the Christian Counselor)Inbox: When Your Parents Don’t ApproveThe holidays are a great time to introduce your boyfriend or girlfriend to your parents. But what do you do when your mom and dad say they don’t approve of your match? Counselor Tim Sanford weighs in.
December 1, 2022
Overcoming the fear of commitment, plus tips for being a better communicator, and is asking a guy out for coffee too forward?Featured musical artist: David Dunn Roundtable: Overcoming the Fear of CommitmentShould I take that job? Can I serve in this ministry? Is it time to pop the question? It’s good to ask such questions, but they can also spark a reluctance to commit. Deciding to commit to something or someone can be an intimidating thing, but if you don’t want to sit on the sidelines of life, at some point you have to make a decision. Our guests share examples of how they’ve struggled with commitment and suggest ways to use discernment when making a choice.Culture: Improving Your ConversationsFor any healthy relationship, communication is key — and Dr. Mike Bechtle has worked for years to help us do it well. In our interview, he’ll address ways to handle conflict, how to ask good questions, and how to “gain more weight” in what you say.Inbox: Should I Ask Him Out? She attends a megachurch but finds it tough to have conversations with single guys since they’re involved in different activities. Should she take matters into her own hands and ask one or more out for coffee? Lisa Anderson weighs in.
November 24, 2022
A panel of pastors on why church matters (part two), plus overcoming anxiety and perfectionism, and how to be friends with moms your age. Featured musical artist: Nathan TaskerRoundtable: Why Church Matters (Part 2)The Boundless team recently held a live event at Third Space Coffee in Colorado Springs to talk about why the local church is an essential part of the Christian life. Joining us were three pastors from the area. We put mics in front of them, Lisa asked a bunch of questions, and over 80 young adults sipped coffee and listened in. Now you can, too, as we share what was recorded in a two-part roundtable last week and this week. In part two, the pastors discuss overcoming church hurt, how to respond to church discipline, and ways to get plugged into a local congregation.Culture: Beating Perfectionism, Fear and WorryIn a culture that thrives on projecting strength, how can we possibly overcome the relentless drive toward perfectionism? Counselor Tim Sanford has some amazing insights into recognizing the difference between fear, anxiety and worry. He’ll show you how to retrain your brain against worry, and will give strategies for bucking perfectionism in favor of excellence. Inbox: Befriending the Moms at My ChurchShe’s a single woman who hopes to have a family someday. She wants to become better friends with the moms at her church, but they seem so busy, and she’s not confident around kids. What can she do? Ashley Bazer weighs in.
November 17, 2022
A panel of pastors on why church matters, plus Tovares and Safa Grey on honoring God in dating, and will a new city improve your dating chances?Featured musical artist: Aaron ShustRoundtable: Why Church Matters (Part 1)The Boundless team recently held a live event at Third Space Coffee in Colorado Springs to talk about why the local church is an essential part of the Christian life. Joining us were three pastors from the area. We put mics in front of them, Lisa asked a bunch of questions, and over 80 young adults sipped coffee and listened in. Now you can, too, as we share what was recorded in a two-part roundtable this week and next. In part one, the pastors discuss how the pandemic affected their congregations, what the Bible has to say about the local church, and what to look for in your search for a church community.Culture: Dating to Honor GodJust because someone says they’re a Christian doesn’t mean they are. How can you know if the person you’re interested in actually has godly character? Tovares and Safa Grey are passionate about guiding young adults through a godly dating relationship in a culture that cares little about honoring God. They’ll address good boundaries in dating, the need to surround yourself with healthy friends, and will offer specific encouragement to the black community on this topic.Get the book Godly Dating 101: Discover the Truth About Relationships in a World That Constantly Lies for your donation of any amount!Inbox: Better Dating Options in a Different City?She’s leading a young adults ministry, has a great job, and is enjoying her church community. However, she’s struggling to find a guy she’d want to date. Is it time to change cities in hopes of finding someone? Lisa Anderson weighs in.
November 10, 2022
Addressing a situationship, plus more of Dr. Bob Paul’s landmark relationship advice, and when your ex has stopped all communication.Featured musical artist: All Sons & DaughtersRoundtable: Navigating a SituationshipYou and someone have been talking or hanging out for a while now. You like each other, but instead of going on dates, you keep the pseudo-relationship rolling without defining it. Sound familiar? Taking cues from the culture, many now describe these scenarios as a “situationship” (similar to what we often call a “friendlationship” at Boundless), and most of the time they lead to frustration and resentment. Our guests share openly about times they’ve been in these go-nowhere arrangements and how you can get out of one.Culture: Foundational Tools for Healthy Relationships (Part 2) As the leader of Focus on the Family’s Hope Restored program, Dr. Bob Paul regularly conducts four-day marriage intensives where he counsels couples who are on the brink of divorce. Lisa Anderson had the opportunity to observe an intensive and says, “Hope Restored is doing great work for marriages in crisis, but in my opinion, every unmarried person should go through this incredible program.” Learn why Lisa speaks so strongly of Hope Restored as she interviews Bob about the foundational lessons he teaches couples and how they can benefit your own personal growth and relationships. In part two, Bob discusses codependency in relationships and what to do when someone triggers you. 9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage: And the Truths That Will Save It and Set It Free Inbox: When an Ex Cuts All TiesWhen you’ve been in a long-term relationship and he or she cuts off communication, how do you handle that? Lisa Anderson weighs in.
November 3, 2022
Asking God honest questions, plus Dr. Bob Paul shares landmark relationship advice, and encouragement for 30-something single men.Featured musical artist: Love and the OutcomeRoundtable: My Biggest God QuestionsSince none of us are God, it’s normal to have questions about who He is, what He’s thinking, and what He’s up to today and, well — forever. Some questions are lighthearted, but others are serious and have big implications. Our guests share questions they’ve had about God, ones they still have, and where some safe places are to get them answered. Culture: Foundational Tools for Healthy Relationships (Part 1) As the leader of Focus on the Family’s Hope Restored program, Dr. Bob Paul regularly conducts four-day marriage intensives where he counsels couples who are on the brink of divorce. Lisa Anderson had the opportunity to observe an intensive and says, “Hope Restored is doing great work for marriages in crisis, but in my opinion, every unmarried person should go through this incredible program.” Learn why Lisa speaks so strongly of Hope Restored as she interviews Bob about the foundational lessons he teaches couples and how they can benefit your own personal growth and relationships. In part one, Bob discusses the importance of safety in relationships, and why boundaries are so important.Receive the book 9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage: And the Truths That Will Save It and Set It Free Inbox: Hope for Single Men in Their 30sHe’s in his mid-30s and is struggling to find a potential spouse. Even though he’s tried online dating, it’s only resulted in a few dates. The waiting is difficult and he’s getting more and more discouraged. Is there hope for him? Counselor Glenn Lutjens weighs in.
October 27, 2022
Worshiping God seven days a week, plus a firsthand look at helping Ukrainian refugees, and when a man feels insecure about being short.Featured musical artist: JJ Heller Roundtable: Worship as a LifestyleWorship is a meaningful and at times deeply emotional experience that connects us to God’s heart. But it’s meant to be much more than just a church service on the weekend. Our guests describe ways they’ve learned to connect with God during the routines of everyday life. Whether it’s through listening to music, prayer, serving, or even working a 9-to-5 job, you’ll see that worship is expressed in many ways.Culture: Lessons From Helping RefugeesThe Russia-Ukraine war has been a devastating reality this year. Many are asking, “What’s the best way to offer help to those in need?” Psychiatrist Dr. Karl Benzio recently got to serve Ukrainian refugees in Warsaw, Poland. He’ll share his inspiring story of how he and his daughter, an art therapist, provided mental health support to the refugees and pastors in that region. He’ll also share ways we can pray for the people affected by this conflict.American Association of Christian CounselorsInbox: Short and Lacking Confidence He listened to a past segment titled “Height Hang-Up” and is wondering how to express genuine confidence in life and relationships, even though he’s shorter than most guys. And how can he be both confident and humble? Josh Zeichik weighs in.
October 20, 2022
The difference between being encouraging vs enabling, plus when someone you’re dating has mental health issues, and should you get back together with an ex after learning about baggage you had before? Featured musical artist: About a Mile Roundtable: An Encourager or an Enabler?We all want to be liked, and what better way to be appreciated by friends than to be an encourager? But what do you do when someone has a bad pattern or habit in their lives? Should you call them out or sweep it under the rug and tell them they’re still a good person? Our panel of guests share about the ways they have benefitted from constructive criticism, and how you can be an encourager, without enabling poor behavior.Culture: Dating and Mental Health IssuesEven with all of our gadgets and technology, mental health issues such as anxiety and depression are on the rise. What do you do when the person you’re dating is struggling? Dr. Karl Benzio is a friend of Boundless, and he’s also an experienced psychiatrist. He’ll address that all of us are a work in progress, and how to know if your dating relationship can survive a mental health struggle. The American Association of Christian CounselorsLink to Counseling ServicesInbox: Should I Reach Out to an Ex Again? She recently ended a six month relationship, but now, she’s recognizing some fears she had about marriage. They also crossed some boundary lines sexually, but they’re both repentant. Now that she recognizes the fears she had and is living repentant of the sexual sin, should she reach out to her ex or not? Counselor Tim Sanford weighs in.
October 13, 2022
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Life Is Hard. God Is Good. Let's Dance.
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