Teen Suicide: Knowing the Signs

Guest (Female): I went up to my bathroom and I wrote a note saying I'm sorry for being a burden, and I felt like killing myself was going to be a favor to those around me because they wouldn't have to deal with me.

I remember sitting on my bathroom floor with my pills and the enemy was just screaming all of these lies in my head, just overwhelming.

John Fuller: Well, that represents every parent's worst nightmare, having a child who was once happy and healthy and thriving during their early years and then suddenly there's a change, a withdrawal, a closing down, a despair. As a parent, you wonder, is this normal teenage behavior or is this something much worse?

I'm John Fuller and welcome to the first episode of Teen Suicide: Knowing the Signs. I'm here with my colleague, counselor Danny Huerta, who's the Vice President of the Parenting and Youth department here at Focus on the Family. Danny, this topic of suicide is, in some ways, terrifying for parents. We don't know if or when there's a crisis lurking beneath the surface of our teen. How do we deal with that?

Danny Huerta: It is so difficult for a parent to navigate the unknowns. It is very stressful. There are many emotions and many stressors surrounding a teen. That could be external, like friendships or dating, a variety of things that are very normal to the teen life.

But then when it mixes with something internal with the teen, that's where the concerns begin to rise. If there is a genetic disorder or other things, that's where parents get worried about the external things happening or some signs that they've heard of. But they have to be very significant to get to this point of wanting to end your life.

Depression is not an uncommon thing for the human being, especially during the teen years. We'll be talking more about the difference between an episode, a moment, and a full-fledged depression that leads to somebody wanting to end their life. A parent really maintaining connection, observing your child, teaching your child how to handle stress, modeling it well in your home—that stress is neutral, but you need to go into the interpretation.

Why am I so stressed out about this? Why am I so anxious about this? Those are the places you go into with your teen and you learn a lot about your teen in those conversations. If you're very disconnected, certainly that's going to create concern because you don't know what's going to happen.

The first step is to find ways to begin to connect with your child. If they push you away, it doesn't mean you just go away. You keep bidding for that connection with your teen and finding ways to come into their world. It creates an insecurity for a parent when a teen is pushing them away or doesn't know how to articulate emotions, so they'll just give short answers. For a parent, that can up our anxiety on not knowing what to do or what to say. Sometimes just being persistent and present is what we need.

John Fuller: Well, we'll get into more of the specifics as we go along here. But let me just turn to you, our listener. If you're worried about your teen and you think you've got something significant, please remember that we have caring Christian counselors here who can listen to what the issues are, pray with you, and then get you on a path toward healing and help.

Those counselors are available and we can schedule a consultation. The number is 800-A-FAMILY or you can reach out through this website, focusonthefamily.com/teensuicidepodcast. Of course, we'll have the details in the episode notes as well.

Today, we're going to hear the difference between normal adolescent behavior and clinical depression, as Danny indicated. We're going to hear now from Dr. Gregory Jantz, a licensed mental health counselor who specializes in treating anxiety and depression. He's written an insightful book called *When Your Teenager Becomes the Stranger in Your House*. Here's Dr. Jantz talking with Focus on the Family president Jim Daly.

Jim Daly: So a teenager, though, they're going through a lot of changes. There's a shedding of the skin. It's like, "Okay, I thought I knew her or I thought I knew him, and all of a sudden there's this change." And you go, "Who is this? Who is living in my house? I don't know you anymore." There's a natural transformation, shall we call it? Sometimes it's awkward. Sometimes it's like, "Oh no, I don't even know how to relate to my kid anymore." So I'm going to call all that pretty normal.

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Yeah, that's normal.

Jim Daly: What as a parent are some of those things that differentiate between normal and now I'm a little worried?

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Yes, and that's what we need to look at. A teen may go through the moodiness, there's an awkwardness. The big question is, "Who am I and where do I fit in?" But when you begin to see that suddenly their social circle has changed—it's the kid who has the earbuds in their ear and they're never taking them out.

It's like they're disconnecting. You're seeing them disconnect from a peer group, you may see them disconnect from the family, and you know something's going on, but it's like you can't reach them. If it's a young man, you may say, "Hey, what's going on? How are you?" And it's one-word answers: "Fine." You know, it's like, how do I reach him or her?

If you notice that they're withdrawing more and more—now, sometimes this can be normal, they're working through something—but we're talking three months have passed. Maybe academically we see some concerns. They're not wanting to do the normal things they were doing, be with friends. You don't see them, their routines have changed. Maybe they want to hide out in their room. You see a constant negativity. We're looking for a pattern that is lasting over a period of time.

We also may really need to listen to the words they're using. They may be using fewer words, but kids give us some clues. "Nobody likes me," or they may say things that surprise you, like "Nobody cares about me," and things that normally you didn't hear them say.

Jim Daly: Now, some of that can be very normal. I remember being seven years old and I was depressed because my older brothers and sisters seemed to get all the fun and they got all the permission to do fun things. I'm way later born than they were—six years to my closest sibling. But I remember one time going around, and this is actually silly, but just saying, "I'm going to kill myself because nobody here loves me." There's a difference between just isolation and then real depression. Looking back on that, I was just a child who was lonely, looking for attention.

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Looking for attention.

Jim Daly: Especially with my extraversion. Like, "Nobody's paying attention to me and that bugs me." For that parent, how do you discern adequately between, "Okay, this is just he's feeling isolated," versus, "Uh oh, we better take him to a psychologist"?

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Sure. If you're not able to have time where they're able to tell you what's going on. A kid may feel betrayal: "My friends have rejected me." Particularly for boys, they're going to handle this differently generally. A sense of betrayal, "I feel rejected," and you may see some real aggressive behavior, you may see them really withdraw, we may see a time of a lot of tears.

As we look at what—if we cannot connect with them—and here's what I'm going to suggest: don't just go into their room and say, "Take those earbuds out of your ears and let's talk." That's probably not going to work.

Jim Daly: It drives them probably to more silence.

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Right. But if you can find a way to engage in some activity with them, and I think sometimes as simple as, "Hey, let's go out for just a little walk, I want to have some time with you," and begin to hear their heart. What's going on? How were they hurt?

A kid who gets hurt repeatedly—rejections, betrayals—they may not know even how to process that or what's going on or how to even put that into words. You've probably noticed, by the way, your boys may be a little slower to put feelings into words, generally speaking. Help them. We've got to find a way to connect with them, be with them physically. Now, if you're just seeing ongoing deterioration, we really do need to step in and intervene. I think there's a place where we've got to get some help to our kids. We don't want to wait too long.

Jim Daly: And that's a good point. I mean, again in my little illustration, by the next day I was fine. I was back to normal and having fun. It was just that one day I really had a funky feeling about where I was at, kind of what you're saying. As a parent, you have to be aware of, "Okay, this is just a momentary thing, don't freak out, don't panic," and then when it's prolonged, that lack of resilience is an issue.

Dr. Gregory Jantz: It is. Lack of resilience, they're not coming back. Let's also not freak out. Your kid has a bad day and you go, "Oh no, what's going on?" No, they're going to have those and they need to learn how to emotionally deal with tough days and they need to process. We need to allow them the space to do that and part of this is growing up. But when we come to a place where they're not responding and the darkness—that cloud—is growing darker. One thing I hear from parents is, "I wish we wouldn't have waited so long. I wish we would have done something sooner."

John Fuller: This is Focus on the Family. Dr. Greg Jantz is our guest today and as a parent, Dr. Jantz, you've got a couple of boys. Have you had those moments where you've had to say, "Okay, this is normal," or, "I wonder if..."?

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Yes, I have. I've walked this and I've had these transformational times and transitions. Some of these are just natural transitions. They've got one foot in adulthood, one foot in teenagerhood, and it's like they're trying to figure out, "Where do I fit in?" Sometimes growing up can seem a little scary too.

I have a boy entering college and we've been talking all summer about just the transition.

Jim Daly: Going onto a campus alone and trying to figure out, "Where do I fit in? Who am I? What club do I go to?"

Dr. Gregory Jantz: So, and we can really help our kids walk through these transitions, but we need to also know if we see issues and they have disengaged, and disengaged from a social group, disengaged from church or youth group, and we continue to watch them disengage, something's going on that needs attention.

John Fuller: Some great wisdom from Dr. Gregory Jantz. Danny, you've got a couple of teens. Have you ever wondered if your kids are struggling with just normal adolescent stuff or something more serious?

Danny Huerta: I think the question is always there, especially if you see extreme behaviors in your kids or extreme emotions that you weren't expecting. We've had moments along the way with especially my daughter early on in her life where we were wondering, "Is there something going on here?" We were able to see things shift back to normal and so we knew that was an episode, that was a moment in time for her.

When it becomes pervasive or a long period of time, then that's when you become concerned. Like yesterday, I was talking to my son and he said, "Hey Dad, while we were climbing, she just wasn't really responding. There was something completely wrong." And it started to affect him emotionally and he felt kind of down. He said, "I don't know what's going on," and then she didn't respond.

So there's a contagious effect with teens on their emotions. You want to watch what friends they're hanging with, but in this moment it was a depressive episode that made perfect sense. I just said, "Hey son, when that happens, your emotions are responding just like they're supposed to. That is kind of disappointing to you and it's sad to you. You feel like your girlfriend's not paying attention to you, not responding the way you thought it was going to go."

Sometimes we have to adjust to those moments. It was a great conversation for us to process the feelings he had towards a situation he was in. Our teens are in multiple situations and have their emotions rising up. Help them interpret the situations correctly. There are so many misinterpretations for teens and they go straight to, "There's something wrong with me," instead of "What was there in the situation that I wasn't able to understand well?"

A great question that I use in my counseling practice is: is there another way to look at that? And then we look at the multiple choice. Which one is more truthful? And then let's go with that one. With my son this morning, he said, "Dad, I feel better this morning. It's a new day. I'm looking forward to talking to her."

That's what the teenage years are all about: change and day-to-day and quick-changing moments for them. But many times it feels permanent to them. What you want to watch for: are they fully negative all the time? Have they reached hopelessness? Are they overwhelmed? Because at that point, that's when you may need to really search for some help because they may be stuck. Don't be afraid to seek counseling if you need to.

John Fuller: As I mentioned earlier, give us a call here at Focus on the Family if you don't know where to start in that process. Danny and his team have a number of helpful articles dealing with teen depression and suicide. One explores in depth the signs of depression in teens and you can find the link to that article on our show page or when you visit focusonthefamily.com/teensuicidepodcast.

Let's go ahead and hear more now from Dr. Jantz as he explains how boys and girls show depression differently and he also offers some dos and don'ts for when your teen brings up the topic of suicide. Let's open up now with a question from Focus president Jim Daly.

Jim Daly: Dr. Jantz, let's go right there. How do boys and girls manifest depression differently?

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Sure, and I'm going to make some generalities.

Jim Daly: Is that politically correct even to say they do?

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Well, we know they do. If you've lived with a boy or a girl who has struggled with issues, you know they express them differently. Okay, describe it. A boy may become more reclusive. They're going to maybe pull back and withdraw and they're going to oftentimes turn it into anger.

So something has happened, "I've been hurt." A boy may express it through anger or aggression. "I can handle this on my own," and they're going to withhold showing a lot of other emotions. So you may see more anger coming from the boy and if they have felt a sense of betrayal from friends—and betrayal and boys is very interesting to observe because betrayal, a lot of times a boy feels like "I have to get even. I am going to do something back."

They're struggling. They're struggling with depression, they're struggling with anger because depression is really a combination of a lot of different symptoms. A lot of times they've been really hurt or emotionally injured and it's coming out through depression. Now, a girl you may see a lot more tears. She may be a lot more verbal. She's putting her feelings into words a lot easier.

You may ask your son, "Well, what is going on with you? Are you okay?" "I'm fine." That's it. That's where the conversation ends, their one or two-word answers. You ask your daughter, "Sweetheart, what's going on? I'm concerned about you," and you get it all. You get the emotion and you get the tears and you get a lot of words.

Jim Daly: Hitting the issue and the topic of suicide, teen adolescent suicide is off the charts right now. We talked a bit about that at the top of the show last time, just what's happening in the mind of a teenager. All the desperation, not measuring up, all the technology that allows others to measure you—the Snapchat thing and other social media—"Are you the greatest, the best, the whatever?" and bullying, cyberbullying that's occurring.

All those things in addition to the things that we all kind of went through as teenagers back when. When you see that, let's talk more specifically about potential movement from depression to having suicidal thoughts. I was stunned by one of the stats. It was amazing the number of young people that attempt suicide. Do you remember that number?

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Well, they attempt, and it's hard to get accurate numbers because to get this information, we know it's a real issue. It's a big number. They're big numbers, whatever it is. And so here's what happens. Our kids these days, suicide is so common and we hear it in the news a lot, and it's almost seen like it's one of the options available to you.

That's frightening to even say that, but it's like in our culture suicide is an option that is available to you. Now, our teens have usually low impulse control. In other words, they're impulsive. They're still working on that. We call it the prefrontal cortex—that put your hand on your forehead, that's where all that executive good decisions are made.

Our teenagers are still developing that and so they're going to show more signs of being impulsive. Technology's perfect for being impulsive. I'm one click away from anything and I can be impulsive all day long with my technology. So if they don't see options quickly, because they're used to having everything instant—we're in an instant culture.

Our teenagers are being impulsive with their decisions and we may see a lot of depression. If it stays in depression and it moves one notch over to despair, they can be very impulsive. They can have suicide attempts, they're beginning to entertain thoughts that "It would be better if I wasn't around. I'll show you guys. I'll kill myself." That's how they're thinking. They've entered an impulsive, unregulated—there's no filter. They're seeing that this is an option and that's frightening.

Jim Daly: And worse, they may be seeing it as their only option because there won't be a brighter day for the person that's suffering in depression and contemplating suicide. What does the parent do in that moment when you think you're moving away or moving through depression and now your teen is talking about suicide? What do you do? Who do you call? What resources are available? I mean, this has been going on now for a week, a month, maybe a year and I don't know who to call.

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Suddenly they're like, "Oh, it'd be better if I wasn't around. I think I'm just going to kill myself." And maybe you're seeing that they're even journaling and writing some dark material and they're really not thinking, obviously, with clarity or with any sense of hope for their future.

Well, if you just spend time trying to talk them out of killing themselves—"Oh, you don't want to do that. Killing yourself is never an option"—and if we have that kind of conversation, it may drive it more secret. It's like, "Well, I don't know who to talk to. My parents are not even safe."

But if I can spend time on: tell me more about what's really going on. Help me understand what you're going through. Focus on their feelings, their experience. What must their experience be?

Jim Daly: What are you hunting for as the parent in that moment? What are you trying to find?

Dr. Gregory Jantz: I want to know what happened. Did something happen? What led them down this path that I am feeling like the only option is to kill myself? Now, because kids are impulsive and because I'm a professional counselor, I am going to move quickly to intervene to get some help.

I'm not going to overreact in the moment, but if my kid is talking this way, I am going to take it seriously. I am going to make sure if they're not talking to me, I'm going to make sure they're talking to somebody.

Jim Daly: So get somebody engaged with them. Hopefully, they have a relationship with a smart-thinking adult.

Dr. Gregory Jantz: It could be another adult, it could be a mentor. It's going to probably need to be a professional counselor soon. We're going to need to reach out plus reach out yourself and have somebody help you.

Jim Daly: Dr. Jantz, I need to ask this because I think as a parent, especially for those of us that went through tough times—and it's kind of a "pick yourself up by your bootstraps" orientation, and I'm guilty of that. I was an orphan kid and I went through a lot of really bad stuff. But if you're that kind of parent that is resilient, that has picked yourself up by your bootstraps, that could be very damaging to say to your 14, 15, 16-year-old, "Come on, just keep moving."

Dr. Gregory Jantz: Because they don't know how. They don't know how and they may be comparing themselves to you. "I know my dad had a rough childhood and look, he's done great, and I just can't do it." Those comparisons. When we're depressed, we tend to do a lot of comparisons and feel unworthy. So it's different. Being with your kid is different than talking them out of something. We don't want to talk them out of their feelings. You may be really surprised by something they say and maybe shocked by it, but don't talk them out of their feelings. They need to know you value them and whatever it is, it's okay to share it.

John Fuller: And again, that's Dr. Gregory Jantz talking to Jim Daly. We're joined now in the studio by Dr. Joni DeBrito. Joni is a licensed mental health professional and specializes in crisis and trauma counseling. Joni, thanks so much for helping us navigate this topic. It really can bring up a lot of fear for parents, can't it?

Joni DeBrito: Yes, it can, and thanks so much for having me here.

John Fuller: All right, so let me ask you, Joni, and Danny to address that connection that we talked about earlier between parents and teens. How does a mom or a dad influence the way a teenager responds to those crisis moments? Danny, you gave us some insight earlier about, let's say my teen is feeling really depressed. What can I do?

Joni DeBrito: When teens are feeling depressed, they're desperate to feel better. Often you'll hear from them, "I don't matter, nobody cares, nobody loves me," etc. So in the context of a relationship with a parent, it's really important for parents to not only say but show their children, "I love you, I care about you, you matter to me."

That's sometimes harder done than said. We can all tell our kids, "I love you, I care about you," etc., but what do we do to show them that? It needs involvement, engagement. You've got to be talking with your kids, listening to them, hearing what they have to say.

John Fuller: Okay, I'm going to interrupt you there because we've had teenagers. We have six kids and the last one is in his final years of being a teen. Those are uncomfortable moments to sort of, "Let's talk, Danny. I know you're feeling kind of depressed, so let's talk," and it's silence. Then I probe a little bit and I get one-word answers and it's like, "You know, I'm here to help you." "Yeah, whatever." So, help me push through that. What do I do?

Danny Huerta: Really, the thought bubbles, right? I love to talk to teens about their thought bubbles because they can relate to that. What are the themes of your thought bubbles? Tell me a little bit more about the themes. What are you thinking about? Do you think about music? And then what's the theme of that music?

You look for themes of the thought bubbles. If the themes are overall very dark or they can't articulate—they may not be able to say what they're thinking because they're so overwhelmed with their thoughts—then you want to enter that space and say, "It must be hard to talk about those things, but here's what I've observed or here's what I've noticed or I'm concerned about."

Now you've gained control of the conversation. "Well, you know what? I'm concerned about this because I've noticed this and this and this about you," which is why that connection between a parent and child is so important because you have the observations to work off of if you've spent time.

Joni DeBrito: The other thing that I would say is that hopefully you do have a good relationship with your child and you know those moments when he or she is open to conversation and not open. So I used to watch my kids and wait for those moments when my kids were open to be able to hear from me and then say, "Hey, tell me about."

I love the words "tell me about" instead of asking a closed-ended question, "Where were you? What were you doing?" Tell me about this, tell me about that. Kids will tend to open up, but you have to observe them and you have to know them well enough within the context of that relationship to know when they're ready to talk with you.

John Fuller: Joni, how did we get to this point in the relationship anyway? What are some of the things that maybe I did as a parent that didn't strengthen that relationship with my child?

Joni DeBrito: Probably the biggest issue is that parents are pressed for time. They're going to work, some of them are in school as well, they have multiple needs to address with their kids and so forth. So there are busy schedules, lots of conflicts, etc. It's really hard for them to find time to engage with their kids, but they have to.

Often when they're engaging in this day and age, it's via technology. Technology doesn't allow people to actually read one another's faces, etc. So the best thing that they can do is take some face-to-face time with their kids and engage with them, talk with them, get to know them a little bit better.

Danny Huerta: What I would add to this is that the demands on parents are relentless and it's hard for them to just stop their mind to enter their child's mind and their world. I was talking to a dad recently and he said, "I don't have time to respond. I only have time to react to what's going on in my children."

They have so many things going on, their emotions are spilling out, and I'm just reactive. I get angry right away. I don't want to. Most parents don't want to. They don't set out to be angry or set out to react, and they do so and it does damage the relationship the more that happens.

So it's a matter of slowing down and taking the time to bridge that moment with the child that they're having or that you're having between you and checking in. Time is one of the biggest assets we skip over as parents because we say yes to everything. Sometimes it's important to be able to say no to something and prioritize the moment with your child that you're needing to take to respond to what's going on.

John Fuller: Let me give a word of encouragement to parents who feel like, "My child is just out there." I think I've shared elsewhere that at one point one of our boys was 17 and I just felt like he had closed the door on the relationship. I was reading a book one night and it was almost an audible voice where the Lord said, "Hey, you're the dad. You pursue him. Don't let him make the rules on how this relationship goes."

It took a while, but we were able to kind of rebuild and connect. It hasn't always been easy, but I'm really glad that God kind of prompted me to realize, "Oh yeah, I'm the adult here. It's really up to me to pursue my child in that relationship." Now, there are other relationships too and this is important and this is something we prayed about for all of our kids as they were growing up. Other people in their lives: coaches, teachers, other adults. Speak to the role of others in teens' lives, especially when it seems like mom and dad are as dumb as a doorknob.

Joni DeBrito: Yes, and sometimes those others will say the same thing you've been saying and they're brilliant, even though they thought that you were not so brilliant. I would say that having other adult mentors in a kid's life is so important. They need other adults to speak into their lives.

With one of my daughters when she was a teenager, she was going through some issues with a boyfriend and I was just listening and kind of offering some ideas. But she had a great friend down the block and her mom was a high school teacher. I said, "Why don't you go talk to Liz about this and see what she says?"

Liz said pretty much the same thing I did. But when my daughter came back, she said, "Ma, let me tell you what Liz said. This was such great advice." I didn't care that I had said the same thing to her multiple times before. I cared that it got through and it was very effective what she told her. So that was awesome.

Danny Huerta: It's essential for kids to have the rolling credits—the people surrounding them in their lives. Coaches have a huge influence, teachers can speak life into kids. Youth pastors have—it's been shown that youth pastors have a direct influence on kids' lives, a significant influence.

Pastors, you've got other people within the church that can mentor your child. Ask for that. I know with my son, we've encouraged him to have at least two people that he has on that list throughout his high school years. My daughter as well, and they go out to lunch, they go out to coffee sometimes. It's giving the child ownership in that, but just know that there are some adults that you may need to ask to invest in your child's life because you've seen that initial connection and your teen may be too shy to ask, may be too embarrassed or too anxious to ask. Help facilitate that connection because it will be very valuable to your child.

John Fuller: Okay, so let's turn a corner and talk prevention for a moment. There are those listening who have younger kids. What can they do to develop a stronger bond with their children before those tumultuous teen years?

Joni DeBrito: I would start with setting up an environment of open communication where kids can talk about anything. You let them know that you want to hear from them and you show them that you want to hear by opening up conversation, letting them talk, and then just listening.

John Fuller: That's what Dr. Jantz was saying in that clip, right?

Joni DeBrito: Just listening, hearing what they have to say. Sometimes they say things that are a little shocking. Sometimes they may be trying to shock you. You can always go back and revisit those things, but at that moment you want them to be able to talk to you about anything so that as they get older and things start to trouble them, they actually will come to you and say, "Hey, I'm really struggling with something."

Just as Danny talked about his son mentioning to him that he was struggling with the reaction of his girlfriend. If you have that open communication, that's one thing you can do. Another thing is that failure is a part of life and kids have to learn that it's okay to fail and it's helpful for their parents to be there to help them and support them and help them learn how to cope.

We have a lot of kids who are depressed because in their minds they're not meeting up to the expectations that either they have for themselves or their parents have set. So therefore they get really depressed. They need to learn that failure is a part of life and there are healthy ways to cope and unhealthy ways to cope. So being there to help them learn those healthy ways is really important.

Then the last thing I would say is take care of yourself. Drink water, get plenty of rest, go outside and enjoy the sunshine, have a lot of fun, etc. Do things to take care of yourself and teach your kids that self-care so that when they start to have a difficult day or whatever, they know what to do to get reset, as Danny mentioned.

Danny: And an environment that has a high level of warmth and sensitivity where you've developed that, but balanced with a home that's not afraid to have boundaries, limits. I've noticed a sense of fear in a lot of parents where they become much more permissive so that their kids will not be unhappy.

That creates unhappiness and actually research points to the fact that kids that grow up in a permissive home end up at a higher risk of having suicidal thoughts down the road. So it's not about just letting them do whatever they want. It's about creating structure and purpose and vision and identity, but also along the way having the time for warmth, sensitivity, connectedness.

That's a balance that we have developed in the Seven Traits of Effective Parenting. If you go to the assessment, you can start there and see how you're doing with that. Here at Focus on the Family, we've developed that assessment for parents to have a starting point for this very thing: How do I start to create an environment and a relationship with my child that creates a solid foundation?

John Fuller: I appreciate so much your insights and your expertise and your hearts for parents and for kids. As a listener, we're going to highly recommend the book that you've heard about in the clips with Dr. Greg Jantz. It's called *The Stranger in Your House* and we'll send a copy when you make a donation of any amount to Focus on the Family today. You can donate and get your copy of that book at focusonthefamily.com/teensuicidepodcast or when you call 800-A-FAMILY.

This podcast, *Teen Suicide: Knowing the Signs*, is the first in a series of podcasts addressing mental health in youth. We'll have future podcasts on topics like anxiety and self-harm and social media as well. To learn more about that assessment Danny mentioned or preventing teen suicide, our *Alive to Thrive* online training curriculum is available through the website.

It's a great help to any adult who plays an influential role in a child or teen's life, be that as a parent or coach or pastor, a teacher, or just a caring neighbor. You can find out more about *Alive to Thrive* online at focusonthefamily.com/teensuicidepodcast or we'll have details in the episode notes.

Then finally, please subscribe to get upcoming episodes of this podcast. For now, on behalf of Danny and Joni and the entire team here, I'm John Fuller and thanks for joining us for this episode of *Teen Suicide: Knowing the Signs*.