Revive Our Hearts

Guest (Male): Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth has some good news for you. Well, actually, it's the best news ever.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Mm. That would be a very traumatic and lonely experience.

Heidi Jenkins: Yes. Many women end up in the emergency room.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Mm.

Heidi Jenkins: And so there's just there's some women who say, oh, it wasn't so bad. But for the most part, many of the women that I've spoken to have described just a a horrible experience of taking the abortion pills and being in violent pain, screaming and if no one's there to help them, they just feel completely alone and you know, they're reluctant to go to the emergency room because this is something they elected to do.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Mhm. I would imagine too that, you know, they would be surprised by that based on the information, the propaganda, the ads, what they're being told. They're probably surprised when they find themselves in that place of it being such a frightening experience.

Heidi Jenkins: It's very traumatic for so many women and I think it complicates the healing process because it's it's so graphic and I think that it produces more guilt and grief than the surgery because it's so graphic.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Mhm. Again, there is healing. There is hope. They are not alone. You are not alone if that's your story. And we're not telling this story. Heidi's not sharing this today to increase your guilt, to increase your shame, but but to offer you a lifeline of hope.

Heidi Jenkins: No. And Satan doesn't want healing through Jesus. He would rather we stayed in in the guilt and shame box

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Mhm.

Heidi Jenkins: and continued to suffer and continue to hide. Um shame is a very big factor.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: You know, there's a lot of conversation today about shame. I've been in the last decade or so encouraged that the conversation around shame was moving to the forefront because I think that there is toxic, unhealthy shame that Satan creates. I once heard something to the effect of there's no one that's more pro-abortion than the devil when a woman is walking into an abortion clinic and there's no one that is more pro-life than the devil when that same woman is walking out of an abortion clinic. And I thought that's so true. He changes the lives up on us and one of the things is he takes something called shame and he twists and distorts it to the place where we believe in your words, this is an unpardonable sin, which is not true.

So I want to ask a question about shame because I think that shame in God's hands can be a tool that leads us to his loving forgiveness and redemption.

Heidi Jenkins: It certainly led me in that direction.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Tell me how.

Heidi Jenkins: I couldn't live with my shame. As I said, I I was extremely depressed and I didn't know how to put one foot in front of the other. And yet I had two small children who I needed to take care of and my husband at the time had been promoted and he was traveling a lot and so I needed to function. And I knew that if I didn't find healing that I wouldn't be able to function because I couldn't live with myself.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Mhm.

Heidi Jenkins: So at the time, we had started a tent my husband and I had started attending Redeemer Presbyterian Church in New York City, which was started by Tim and Kathy Keller.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Mhm.

Heidi Jenkins: And listening to Tim preach not directly about abortion, but somehow his wisdom seemed to blanket so many different areas of my life.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: This is Tim Keller who passed away in May of 2023. He was Heidi Jenkins' pastor. The Lord used his gentle gospel centered teaching to work in her heart. For example, in this message, Tim Keller was referring to the encounter that Jesus had with the woman at the well.

Heidi Jenkins: He thirsted. He got the cosmic thirst so we could get the water of life. And see, it's not just to know the water of life is that gives you the joy. You have to see what it cost him to give it to us and that will change your heart. That will change your heart. When she gets that, she will not need men the way she did. You won't need men or women the way you do. You won't need money. Money just becomes money. Men just become men. Women just become women. Romance becomes a good thing, but not the most important thing.

You're free. Do you know what the power of a changed life is? Do you know how radical it is, how radically your your life can change? If you don't see religion and morality as the way you change your life and effort, but you see the grace of God that comes in, electrifies you and changes the very basis of your self-image, your identity, of your the very the very foundations of your heart.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: He often talked about a Welsh doctor and minister named Martin Lloyd Jones.

Guest (Male): I love Martin Lloyd Jones.

Heidi Jenkins: Martin Lloyd Jones said, stop listening to yourself and start talking to yourself. And that really stuck with me because I had been listening to myself as opposed to pouring the truth of God's word into myself.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Yeah. So instead of just listening to the guilt and the shame and the messages of condemnation, you start to find some of those scripture verses that you mentioned about forgiveness and the truth that my sin is as far as the east is from the west. That's how far away it is from me. And you start to tell yourself those things. That's what he was meaning by that.

Heidi Jenkins: Yes, exactly. I at the time was attending Kathy Keller's Bible study when she encouraged me to write out my testimony and asked me to share it on Easter Sunday at Redeemer. Kathy was instrumental in editing my drafts. And after I told my story, many women came up to me and thanked me for sharing my story. And there's some wonderful books out there that also talk about healing from abortion. One of them that I've recommended over and over again is called Her Choice to Heal by Sidna Massey.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: I love Sidna. She's precious. Yes.

Heidi Jenkins: And there's one called Will I Cry Tomorrow by Susan Stanford Rouw and that's probably out of print by now, but that was also one that I just resonated with that book because it was one of the first ones I read that showed me that yes, other women do have some of these same feelings after experiencing abortion. So talking to myself and filling my mind with information that helped me to heal was key in moving forward.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: You know, Heidi, you mentioned that what was winsome and compelling to you about Chuck Colson is that he seemed to have a peace about him. And I feel like as I sit here looking at you on Zoom, you have that peace about you and you have wisdom about you. And it's evident to me that that night that you received Christ because of Chuck Colson's testimony, but he passed a baton of faith onto your heart that you're passing on as hope to other hearts today. I wonder do you possibly just could we pray for the woman who's maybe in the middle of your story and she's not at that place of peace just yet.

Would you pray for her?

Heidi Jenkins: Oh, yes. Father, I thank you for this opportunity to share my story that may help other women who've experienced something similar. I pray that any woman listening today would know that you hear her feelings of shame and embarrassment, that you gather her tears in a bottle, that they are not hidden from your from your being. Thank you, Lord, for providing permission to heal, permission to express our anger, permission to talk about what we formerly and some women may still feel is unforgivable. But Lord, you do tell us that when we confess our sins, you are faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

And all unrighteousness means everything. There isn't anyone's sin that your forgiveness doesn't cover. So Lord, please enable any woman listening who has experienced an abortion or a pregnancy loss of whatever sort to find comfort in knowing that you accept her, that you love her and that you are holding her in your arms. Father, also help women to know that any child that was aborted is with you, Lord, and is thriving with you. And so please give women that reassurance that they are peaceful and happy and well taken care of until we meet again as King David said when he lost his son.

And we just pray this in the powerful name of Jesus, our Lord and Savior. Amen.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Amen. You know, I love the way God is using Heidi's story to encourage her church family, our Redeemer of Hearts family, and surely so many others. There is hope after abortion because Jesus really does redeem. Would you let God use your story to take some time to think through the narrative of God's redemptive work in your life? Maybe even grab a pen and paper or or open up a word doc so you can really capture it. And then ask the Lord who needs to hear my story of redemption? Lord, would you open the doors for me to tell it?

And you know, I have a hunt that's a prayer he'll be glad to answer. Mhm. If you'd like to hear some more examples from women who have testified to God's redemptive work in their lives, we've got so many beautiful stories on our website. We'll link to some of those in today's transcript at redeemerofhearts.com. That's where you'll find the full length version of Heidi's story too. And if you'd like to dive even deeper into the heart of Christ this Christmas, Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth has just released the most beautiful resource to help you do that. It's called Consider Jesus, Meditations on the Person and Work of Christ.

In the midst of all that feels frantic during the holidays, this 31 day Advent devotional draws your spirit back to what really matters. It's Jesus, the one who came to be near to you, to rescue you and to give you a redemptive story to tell. We'll send you a copy when you make a donation of any amount this month. So head on over to redeemerofhearts.com or call us at 1-800-569-5959 to request yours. You know, nearly a quarter of evangelicals today reject Jesus as God. This is simply a devastating statistic, isn't it? And Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth explains why the Lordship of Christ matters so deeply for each of us and invites you to reclaim a reverent heart towards Jesus on Monday.

Please be back for redeem of our hearts. This program is a listener supported production of redeem of our hearts in Niles, Michigan calling women to freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness in Christ.