Reset

Bonnie Sala: Some of us need to ask ourselves one question before we open our mouths. I'm Bonnie Sala with Reset.

Susan is a helpful person, maybe too helpful. She's always had plenty of advice on pretty much every topic. First for her friends, then for her husband and kids, and now for her adult children who are raising her grandchildren. Whenever her daughter tries a new parenting approach, Susan can feel the words rising: "In my day, we did it differently."

But Susan has learned to ask herself a quick little question before all that advice comes tumbling out of her mouth: "Why am I talking?" In English, those four words happen to spell out a tidy acronym, WAIT. But it's the question itself that matters.

Susan is now trying to pause and really listen before continuing with the great advice she wants to share. So far, she's been able to hold back for nine full seconds. The Bible says even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues.

It's not that giving advice is wrong. It's that timing and listening matter more than most of us realize. It's hard to hold our tongues. They're dangerous, and the Bible doesn't pretend otherwise. It calls the tongue a fire. In the Bible book of Psalms, David prayed, "Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips."

Maybe you have a Susan moment coming this week—someone in your life who needs to be heard, not corrected. Before you speak, try asking the same question Susan now asks herself: "Why am I talking?"

Then wait until you actually have something worth saying. I'm Bonnie Sala. Ready to grow your faith? Discover practical tools and more at Guidelines.org.