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Jack Graham: Welcome to PowerPoint with Jack Graham. And we live in a world of self-indulgence, personal fulfillment. And when you talk about submission in this context, people look at you like you lived in the dinosaur era. And it's a cause for conflict in the culture today.

Guest (Female): On today's PowerPoint, Dr. Graham brings a message about the woman's role in her marriage. Now, here's Dr. Graham with his message, word to the wives.

Jack Graham: The title of this message is A Word to Wives. So, what does God say to wives? What's the message regarding this relationship? Now, we already know, according to 1 Peter, chapter 3, that we as husbands and wives are joint heirs of the grace, the life of God.

There is total equality in Christ between a man and a woman. And having said that, a man is then to love his wife as Christ loved the church, and the wife is given specific biblical instructions as to how she is to live and respond in this marriage to the loving guidance and leadership of her husband.

It's found in 1 Peter 3:1-6. Likewise, and he's been talking about authority in the government. So, that's what the likewise is about here. In response to this whole issue of authority in our lives, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word. That is, you may be married to a man who is not a Christian, or a man who does not obey the word of God, a carnal, childish believer. If some do not obey the word, they may be one that is brought to Christ without a word by the conduct, the behavior of their wives.

How? When they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external, the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry or the clothing you wear. But, ladies, let your adorning be the hidden person of your heart, with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is, in God's sight, is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God, and that's the goal, both guys and gals today, that we would be holy as God is holy. Holy men and women. Women of God, men of God, that you would be holy.

How the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah. Christian wives, you're in the sisterhood of Sarah, who obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, and you are her children if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. Do you know what a submissive attitude and spirit does for all of us? It gives us character and confidence that we do not fear anything around us.

On top of that is Colossians 3:18 which says, "Wives, submit to your husbands as is fitting to the Lord." Ephesians 5:33, "However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband." So, interchangeably, the word submit or respect your husband is given.

Let's talk about what all that means. First, with the thought of the perfect model of submission. Submission is in the DNA of the Christian. Why? Because Jesus came in humility and submission to the will and the work of the Father.

In Philippians chapter 2, He laid aside His dignity in the Godhead and came to Earth, and in His manhood, He gave Himself to do the will of the Father. The fact is, Jesus submitted to His Heavenly Father, but He also submitted to His earthly father and mother, His parents. We're told in Luke chapter 2 and verse 51, "And He went down with them, Jesus, as a young man, and came to Nazareth, and was submissive." Imagine that. The Son of God, submissive to Joseph, submissive to Mary, "and His mother treasured all these things in her heart." That is, she remembered it and told others about it, the submissive spirit of Jesus.

Just before the cross, when Jesus was giving His life on the cross to die for our sins, He was in the upper room with His disciples, and in the moment, He took off His outer clothing, His cloak, and took up a towel and a wash basin, and He washed the feet of His disciples. Some of you have seen a foot washing. So, I give you that to show you, ladies, and men, that submission is in our DNA because it is in Christ, and we are in Christ. It is humility and respect. The principal meaning of submission is next.

What does it mean? It means that we show respect and honor. The Bible says, "Give honor to whom honor is due." And wives, you are to give yourself to love your husband and to respect him and honor him. To submit is to respect in humility, it is to honor, it is to elevate. It is to love, it is to serve, it is to be a helper. And you say, "Well, that sounds subservient, that sounds inferior." Not at all. To say that the woman is made to be the helper of the man. The Bible says that God is my help, that God is my helper. God Himself takes the word helper unto Himself.

So, yes, it is God-like, it is Christ-like to live in honor and humility towards others. The opposite, of course, is to be rebellious, and recalcitrant, and resentful, and dishonorable, and bitter, and angry. And we live in a world of self-indulgence and personal fulfillment. And when you talk about submission in this context, people look at you like you lived in the dinosaur era. And it's a cause for conflict in the culture today. And, and a lot of wives get all nervous when we come to this service or this subject, rather. Because, frankly, so many have been listening to the world instead of the word of God.

And you don't have to listen to me. But if you're a Christian, you are to obey the Word of God. And you just need to know how to do it. And so, that's what we're talking today. Most of the time, what we're missing in relationships is because of a lack of humility, and pride, and selfishness. The proverb says, "By pride, only by pride comes contention." Pride creates contention. And so, when pride, with the big I, shows up in our marriages, in our homes, then the infighting begins, the fighting begins.

And frankly, young ladies today, you're growing up in an era where we're hearing more and more that every man is toxic. And every man is an oppressor, and you are the oppressed. The oppressor and the oppressed. And no wonder so many young women are confused about men and where and what a man is to be and what she is to be in relationship to a man. If you view man as, every man as toxic and oppressive, then you're never going to live in a loving relationship with someone else.

And that's why, frankly, many women are turning to other things rather than to a man, a godly man, who could love them and show them the love of Christ. So, submission, the S word is not a dirty word. It's the way of the Master. It's the way of the Lord. And the picture of submission is as unto the Lord, as unto the Lord. I I just want to say, this is not all that complicated, even a man could understand it. What this means.

As fitting unto the Lord. Your commitment is to the Lord. Your heart is for God. And therefore, you want to obey God even, and especially, in your relationship with your husband, with your children. As fitting to the Lord. That's the phrase in Colossians 3 that we read earlier, as fitting to the Lord. Now, does submission mean that you as a wife are to obey all the commands and the demands of your husband, even if the commands and the demands of your husband violates God's Word? Absolutely not. Absolutely not.

In fact, in Acts chapter 5, we're told that we must obey God and not man. Your first responsibility and accountability is to obey God. And if your husband asks you or demands of you that you do something immoral, or that you do something illegal, you have no biblical law that would require you, to obligate you, to do what your husband says. Not one. And never ever allow a man to lead you into sin.

That goes for unmarried women and girls, as well as married women. Never allow a man to lead you into sin. You should not submit to that godlessness, ever.

Guest (Female): You're listening to PowerPoint with Jack Graham, and the message, Word to the Wives. We are excited to share that we have a new way to connect with us. It's our texting service designed to keep you connected with everything happening here at PowerPoint. You'll be the first to know about upcoming events, special announcements, and truly enriching content. To join, start a new text conversation by texting the word CONNECT to 59789. Again, text CONNECT to 59789. Every gift given to PowerPoint Ministries before June 30th will be doubled through a $200,000 matching grant. This is a crucial moment as we close out the fiscal year because your support helps ensure that the truth of Jesus continues reaching people who are searching for something real they can trust. And as our thanks for your gift, we'll send you The Jesus Discoveries by Dr. Jeremiah Johnston, a resource designed to strengthen your confidence in the truth of the gospel. To give your gift and request your copy, text JUNE to 59789. That's JUNE to 59789. And thank you for helping share the truth of Jesus with a searching world. Now, let's get back to today's message, Word to the Wives.

Jack Graham: It's important that you love your husband, respect him, and honor him, and follow his leadership even as Sarah, it gives the illustration here of Sarah and Abraham. When Abraham came in one day and said, "I've been out talking to God. Looking at the stars, and God told me, Sarah, that we're to pick up here in Ur of the Chaldees, and we're to leave this place. We're moving, Sarah." And Sarah says, "Well, where are we going?" And Abraham says, "I don't have a clue. I don't know. I don't know where we're going." Says, "We're moving, but we don't know where Yep, I just told God that I would believe Him and follow Him."

Said, "Well, you don't know where we're going or what we're going to do? You're, we're just picking up, we're leaving, we're going?" That's right. Now, I don't know what entailed that whole conversation, but after the discussion, Sarah went with her husband. And Aaron, Abram and Sarah were blessed in their marriage with a son, and a child, and a birth of a nation. It's very important that if God is leading your husband, if you have a husband who's listening to the Lord, that you follow your husband. And sometimes there's a tip ball and you don't know where it's going. Sometimes there's a tiebreaker, let your husband break the tie. If it comes, most of the time it never comes to that.

Because if you have a close marriage and a loving relationship, you discuss these things. I I've always done that. There very rarely should be those times where, you know, somebody, the husband or somebody else has to break the tie. Now, you get there together. But if there is, that's a decision that many, many, many, many of you have made through the years. You've let your husband make the call even when maybe you didn't think it was the best decision. But you loved your husband enough to respect him and honor him. And let me just say that men really are little boys at heart. And what what men need the most is respect because we tend to think, "I'm never enough, I can't get it done, I can't make enough money, I'm not going to be successful, I'm not this, I'm not that." And that's why men need to know that they're respected and honored.

Many men, unfortunately, will not lead. And that's a problem. It's a problem when a man is so weak, he'll not lead his family, spiritually or otherwise. That's a problem. So, what are you to do as a wife with your conduct, with your behavior? That's what Peter says. With your conviction in Christ, with the conduct that you have. Don't berate him, don't push him, don't don't beat him with your Bible, but with your life and your lifestyle, show him the love of Jesus Christ. And this can propel him forward. This is what God does in a woman's heart when we yield to Him. Men, God holds us accountable to lead our families. And if you're not leading, you're putting your wife's life really in jeopardy.

If your husband is passive, pray for him, wait on God, help him, but don't dominate him. Don't try to control him. Don't usurp your husband's authority in your home, especially in front of your children. Hang on to God's promises like Sarah, trust Him. It's not your job to change your husband, it's your job to love your husband. And to give your life to him, respect him because every man needs it. Be affirming and be encouraging because every man needs a cheerleader. Every man needs an encourager. There are many, many men in this room, including this one right here, who kept going in their lives, their careers, their callings because their life their wives have prayed them through and prayed them on and encouraged them.

So, when we talk about submission, and when he talks about a gentle and quiet spirit here, that doesn't mean you go stand in the corner and wait for somebody to tell you what to do. No. It's the gentle and quiet spirit of Christ Himself. But it is in that gentle and quiet spirit that your husband sees your faith and your devotion to God.

So, one final thing. There is the principal meaning of submission, there's the perfect model of submission, and then there is the precious what I'm going to call mentality or mindset of submission. Back to 1 Peter chapter 3, verses 3 and 4. It says, "Do not let your adorning, that is your outer exterior clothing, be external, the braiding of your hair, the putting on of gold jewelry or the clothing you wear. But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit." How many of you, men and women, know that Father Time is undefeated? And there is a beauty on the outside that perishes. That's why somebody, some wag put it. He said, "You know, beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone." But so does beauty go clean to the bone.

And that's what he's talking about here. He's not saying don't wear gold or don't braid your hair or don't wear clothes. That's not what he's saying. But he's saying, "Let your adornment, let your adornment, let your exterior appearance be pure and modest." Ephesians 5:3 says, "But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you as is proper among the saints." And that is translated otherwise in other versions that little phrase must not even be named among you can be translated, "There should not be a hint, not a little hint of immorality or immodesty about you."

And so, we always are asking, the choices that I am making, is there a hint, just a little bit of impurity or immodesty or irreverence? No, not a hint. And that includes our demeanor. And, ladies, I'm going to tell you frankly, it includes your dress. It includes the way you look. If you're dressing in tight fitting, skin showing, stylish, sexy, hot clothing, that's a hint to somebody. If you wear provocative clothing to knock somebody's eyes out, then that's a 1 Corinthians 8 to cause a weaker brother to stumble.

And so, I'm here to tell you, young ladies and older ladies alike, dress modestly. That's what this is about. It's about your appearance and your adornment that is one of purity and holiness and godliness. Concentrate on your inner beauty. Yeah, look great, look nice, take care of yourself. All of that is true. This is not a condemnation of doing the best you can with what you got, men and women. But it is saying to women, if you want to last in love, if you want to last in life, if you want something precious in your life, then adorn yourself in a way that honors God.

Cultivate the beauty of Jesus in your life. That's what lasts. Let the beauty of Jesus be seen in me. So, in my countenance and in my clothing, in my demeanor, in my dress, let everything about me speak of purity and godliness. You, who you are as a Christian woman, is reflected in your devotion to God. It's your character. And if you, and all the men as well, will work on your character, then your countenance and your clothing and all the rest of that will take care of itself.

And as a word to young women as well, Titus 2:4-5 says this, "And so train the young women to love their husbands and children." This is the responsibility of the church, responsibility of older women specifically. To train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, it doesn't mean you can't work outside the home, but it does mean your home is your priority. Your husband and your children first. Means you're going to need extra strength if you work outside the home. You're going to need extra strength to do what you are called to do first. And that's to be the woman of God in your home. To be kind and submissive to their own husbands. What? That the Word of God may not be reviled.

So, if your husband or your children need the Lord, the way to win them is not to lecture them, but to love them. Not to nag them, but to nourish them. Not to push him, but to pray for him. And I believe for most men, the most influential person in their lives is their wives if their wives are godly wives. And God will give you, ladies, the wisdom you need and the strength you need to be that kind of woman. Ask the Holy Spirit to fill you. Ask the Helper to help you to help him, not as his competitor, his competition, but his completer. Because remember, the goal in marriage is oneness. The two should become one.

Guest (Female): You're listening to PowerPoint with Jack Graham, and the message, Word to the Wives. When you support PowerPoint Ministries, you help share God's Word with people around the world through programs just like this one. And as a thank you for your gift this month, we'll send you The Jesus Discoveries by Dr. Jeremiah Johnston as our thanks. This powerful resource walks through real historical evidence that points directly to Jesus, helping strengthen your faith and giving you confidence in the truth of God's Word. And right now, every gift given before June 30th will be doubled through a $200,000 matching grant. This is a crucial moment as we close out the financial year because your support helps ensure that PowerPoint Ministries continues reaching people with the gospel in the months ahead. To give your gift and request your copy, text JUNE to 59789. That's JUNE to 59789.

Guest (Female): We are excited to share that we have a new way to connect with us. It's our texting service designed to keep you connected with everything happening here at PowerPoint. You'll be the first to know about upcoming events, special announcements, and truly enriching content. To join, start a new text conversation by texting the word CONNECT to 59789. Again, text CONNECT to 59789.

Guest (Female): Pastor, what is your PowerPoint for today?

Jack Graham: Well, let me sum it up by asking you both men and women three important questions. Question number one, are you willing to put your spouse's needs above your own? In this me-first, self-esteem-oriented kind of society, in this culture, are you willing to put your mate first and above you? Now, that leads me to my second question. And this question is equally important. Are you willing to make whatever sacrifice is necessary in order for your marriage to be everything God intends for it to be? How do you measure your marriage? Do you measure it by your friends or the standards of society? We look around us and families and homes are crumbling everywhere, and perhaps you think, "Well, we're doing better than others." But here's the real question. Is your marriage meeting God's standard? Are you living together as husband and wife according to God's plan and God's purpose? Is it everything that God intends for it to be?

And then, that brings me to the third question. Are you willing without reservation to do what the Scripture says regarding your role and responsibility in the marriage, and to do it in the power of the Holy Spirit? It all begins with a change of heart, a change of mind, a change of attitude. And this attitude which is in Jesus Christ, the servant spirit, the submissive spirit. That is the role that God has ordained for all of us, both husbands and wives, sacrificially submit to Christ and to one another. Husbands, love your wives as Christ has loved the church. That's what the Bible says. And then wives, according to the Scripture, submit to your husbands as unto the Lord. Remember, we do this only by the power of the Holy Spirit. I want to challenge you today to make a commitment to your spouse, to your marriage, to your family. And most importantly, to God, that you will allow your family to win in life. That you will succeed as salt and light in a dark and flavorless society. That your home and your family will be a winning team.

Guest (Female): And that is today's PowerPoint. Remember, when you give a gift to PowerPoint, we'll send you Dr. Jeremiah Graham's book, The Jesus Discoveries. Just text JUNE to 59789. And join us again next time as Dr. Graham brings a message about the ultimate goal of Christian parenting. That's next time on PowerPoint with Jack Graham. PowerPoint with Jack Graham is sponsored by PowerPoint Ministries.