“You’re something else. I didn’t say that . . . God did.”
Guest (Male): You're something else. I didn't say that. God did. Let's talk on Key Life.
The deepest message of Jesus and the Bible is the radical grace of God to sinners and sufferers. That's what Key Life is all about. So if you're hungry for the hopeful truth that God isn't mad at you, keep listening. Steve Brown is a seminary professor and our teacher on Key Life.
Steve Brown: Thank you, Matthew. We're talking and I'm going to finish this today, maybe even introduce another lie.
We've been talking for the last week or two about the lies that define us and how throughout our lives, we bounce our self-image off of other people. And what we get back, parents and teachers and friends and authority figures and politicians, what we get back is how we define ourselves. And the Bible says, stop it.
I've said it several times. The only one who has the right and the authority to define you is the one who created you. And that's God. And you find in the Bible who you really are.
We talked about we're defined as children of the God of the universe. The IT genius at Key Life, his name is John Meyers, says that the most helpful thing we can do to solve a tech problem is reboot. In other words, turn it off and turn it back on and see what happens.
If a reboot doesn't work for me, John steps in and in ways nobody understands but John, fixes it. That's what God says. We reboot. And that along with God's Spirit brings a remedy to the problem of guilt and shame and fear and regret.
Rebooting our lives is often how we start to correct the lies that define us. You do it with the truth. I have a very close psychologist friend, Dr. John Tarrell, who has had incredible success dealing with lies that define us.
John's story is one of abuse and darkness and he is maybe the best wounded healer that I know. He's been there and he's done that. He survived. He came back. He earned a PhD and has made a difference in a whole lot of lives.
Not too long ago, John wrote something for one of his clients on rewriting the script of one's life. He shared it with me and gave me permission to share it with you.
You say, I have felt abandoned and deserted since I was a child. No one seemed to be interested in me. Both the words and behaviors of my parents did not convey that I was valuable. I have felt that my entire life. It affects everything I do and it's been so deeply entrenched in me. It is as if I am a nonperson.
John says that's what emotional reasoning is. It's a script, a core belief or role in life someone has given you. It is deeply ingrained set of beliefs about oneself and sometimes very dysfunctional set of beliefs and patterns and resultant behaviors that now cause problems in adulthood.
They are learned and reinforced throughout childhood, into teenage years and into adulthood unless challenged. The key, John says, is to write a different script for oneself. Such programming will generally not change quickly and yet it can be altered over time if challenged by new beliefs and by the truth.
For example, he says, the overriding script, nobody wants me. The challenge to such an entrenched script might be to say aloud, I feel completely and totally unwanted. Throwing the left hand out, one after the other, and the right hand and then say aloud, I am precious. I am wanted. I am valuable.
Then touch your right hand to something tangible here and now while saying it. In other words, speak truth to yourself and repeat it.
John goes on to say, I've had people say, but doctor, I just don't believe it. My response, exactly. And that is why I'm having you say it. The Bible says, for as a person thinks in his heart, so is he. We are changing our thoughts via what we know to be truth from God's revelation in the Bible.
Kumer, an actor and film producer, this is John talking, speaking to graduates at an academic ceremony, said something that may best describe everything that John says he said. He said, as you close this chapter of your life and keep writing your story, make sure you stay true to yourself. Live your life with pride and compassion and love and make sure that you have fun doing it. And in the words of Jack, when writing the story of your life, don't let anyone else hold the pen.
Oh, man. Now, that man's not a Christian. He's not a believer, but he spoke some truth that is more true for believers than it is for anybody else. Reboot. Rewrite the script. Dip into the Bible. Don't read the Bible so you can quote verses and show off. Read the Bible because it is a mirror that lets you know who you are.
My friend Norm Evans, a former professional football player with the Miami Dolphins and later the Seattle Seahawks, tells the story of a college football player who went to the coach complaining that the opposing lineman kept pulling his helmet down his eyes. "What should I do?" he asked the coach. The coach looked at him and said, "Son, don't let him."
Some of you, and me too sometimes, when people who have no right or authority to define us do it anyway, just don't let them. Those are the lies that define us. But I got a lot more in this book than. Let me give, let me give you some lies that confuse us. And I'll introduce it and we'll talk more about it next week.
Let me give you a text. It's Isaiah 55:8-9. For my thoughts are not your thoughts. Neither are your ways my ways, says the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. That's Isaiah 55:8-9. Let me, let me give you the lie. In your head you're right, but in your heart you're nuts.
Don't let your heart get in the way. That's a lie. Rationalism, it's going to be a little bit boring, but it's okay to set up the subject. Rationalism is a philosophical epistemological position. Descartes, Spinoza and others that reason is how one gets knowledge. Descartes famously wrote, I think, therefore I am.
By the way, one time Descartes went to a bar and after his first drink, the bartender asked if he wanted another one. He said, "I think not," and disappeared. I'm sorry. But if reason is the only way we attain knowledge, a lot will disappear. Our knowledge will be incomplete. Our lives will become as boring as watching paint dry.
Some of life's most important truths are not garnered through reason, but through one's heart. When Barry Goldwater ran for president, his campaign slogan was, "In your heart, you know he's right." His political opponents countered, "In your guts, you know he's nuts." Actually, truths that our hearts perceive as true may be deeper and more profound and more joyous and more good news than you have ever seen or believed.
Now, we're going to talk about this next week. But before I go, one thing, sometimes trust your heart. You think about that. Amen.
Guest (Male): Thanks, Steve, and that wraps up our study for this week. If you're enjoying this new series like I am, I have some good news. You can stream all of these episodes for free at keylife.org/notmad. Tomorrow, we'll have Friday Q&A and that's of course when Steve and Pete answer the challenging questions you've sent in. Questions like, how were the Old Testament believers saved? That's a great question, right? Be sure to join us for that.
Dysfunctional family traits ran deep inside me. I was much more like my mother than I wanted to admit. I even became an alcoholic just like her. I blew up my marriage and I wounded my kids. That could have been the end of the story, but it was not. God, who began pursuing me all those years before, was not finished with me. Jesus did not give up on me.
Well, that's from an article by Barry Smith, and you can find it in the latest Key Life magazine. This edition features articles from Barry, Matt Hurd, Steve, and Justin Holcomb, and it's yours when you call us at 1-800 Key Life. That's 1-800-539-5433. You can also email Steve at keylife.org to ask for the magazine, or to mail your request, go to keylife.org/contact to find our mailing addresses. Again, ask for Key Life magazine.
Finally, would you join us in the work of Key Life by giving? You can charge a gift on your credit card or include a gift in your envelope, or take out your phone and text Key Life to 28950. Key Life is a member of ECFA in the States and Force in Canada, and Key Life is a listener supported production of Key Life Network.
Featured Offer
A recently-reprinted booklet taken from Steve’s classic book on radical grace, A Scandalous Freedom. Three freedom-stifling tendencies: The freedom we surrender…and the heritage that sets us free. The perfection we desire…and the forgiveness that sets us free. The Gospel we forget…and the joy that sets us free. We are free—no ifs, ands or buts. Jesus said we would know the truth and would be free indeed. Let’s see if he was right.
Past Episodes
- A Fresh Word from God (Steve Brown)
- Acts
- Acts (Steve Brown)
- Acts Overview (Steve Brown/Justin Holcomb)
- Adam and Noah (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- All You Wanted to Know About the Bible but Didn't Ask (Steve Brown/Pete Alwinson)
- Amazed by Grace (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- Among Friends
- Anger and Forgiveness (Justin Holcomb)
- Babette and the Lavishness of Grace (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- Big Message, Little Place
- Big Message, Little Place (Steve Brown)
- Calibrate: Sitting at the Feet of Jesus (Matt Heard)
- Christmas Day (Steve Brown)
- Christmas Eve: A Grace Gift Exchange (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- Christmas Gifts: The Four Mondays of Advent - Part 1 (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- Christmas Gifts: The Four Mondays of Advent - Part 2 (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- Christmas Gifts: The Four Mondays of Advent - Part 3 (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- Christmas Gifts: The Four Mondays of Advent - Part 4 (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- Christmas Special (Steve Brown/Pete Alwinson)
- Comfortable Words (Justin Holcomb)
- Coming Alive (Matt Heard)
- Embracing the Story of the Gospel (Matt Heard)
- Engaging Your Story (Matt Heard)
- Epiphany: Light for the Nations (Steve Brown/Justin Holcomb)
- Experiencing Awesome (Pete Alwinson)
- Galatians
- Getting Saved (Steve Brown)
- God's Grace is Enough (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- Grace Through the Centuries (Steve Brown/Justin Holcomb)
- Gratuitous Grace (Justin Holcomb)
- Harmony in the Band (Steve Brown)
- Heart Matters (Matt Heard)
- How to Handle Hallway Experiences (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- How to Trust God in Difficult Times (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- Humility and How We Achieved It (Steve Brown/Pete Alwinson)
- Is Pentecost Reproducible? (Steve Brown)
- It's about Forgiveness (Steve Brown)
- It's All About Grace (Jerry Parries)
- It's All About Worship (Steve Brown/Pete Alwinson)
- Jesus Saves Sinners for God's Glory (Steve Brown/Pete Alwinson/Justin Holcomb)
- Journey to the Cross (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- Joy is Plural (Matt Heard)
- Laughter and Lament (Steve Brown)
- Lent: God's Kindness Leads to Repentance (Steve Brown/Justin Holcomb)
- Lies from the Enemy (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- Living Your Best Life (Jerry Parries)
- Love (Pete Alwinson)
- Loving Like Jesus (Matt Heard)
- Peter: The Patron Saint of Failures (Justin Holcomb)
- Philippians (Steve Brown)
- Psalms of Lament (Justin Holcomb)
- Real Power (Pete Alwinson)
- Resurrection: It Really Happened and It Changed Everything! (Steve Brown/Pete Alwinson)
- Thankful for the Gospel (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- Thanksgiving in Troubled Times (Steve Brown/Pete Alwinson)
- The Covenants: Abraham (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- The Covenants: Adam and Noah (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- The First Episode of Key Life (1986) (Steve Brown)
- The Gift of Forgiveness (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- The Gifts Christmas Brings (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- The Good Things God Has Done For You (Jerry Parries)
- The Graced Church (Pete Alwinson)
- The Grammar of Gratitude (Matt Heard)
- The Kingdom Manifesto
- The Kingdom Manifesto (Pete Alwinson)
- The Kingdom Manifesto: The Poor in Spirit, Those Who Mourn, & The Meek (Pete Alwinson)
- The Kingdom of God (Steve Brown/Pete Alwinson)
- The Last Week (Steve Brown/Justin Holcomb)
- The Liberating Power of Truth (Steve Brown)
- The Life We Long For (Matt Heard)
- The Life You've Always Wanted (Steve Brown/Matt Heard)
- The Power of Confession (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- The Power of Pentecost (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- The Purpose of Christmas (Steve Brown/Jerry Parries)
- The Spirit Who Gives Life (Steve Brown/Justin Holcomb)
- The Voice of Jesus (Justin Holcomb)
- The Weird Ways of God (Steve Brown)
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Featured Offer
A recently-reprinted booklet taken from Steve’s classic book on radical grace, A Scandalous Freedom. Three freedom-stifling tendencies: The freedom we surrender…and the heritage that sets us free. The perfection we desire…and the forgiveness that sets us free. The Gospel we forget…and the joy that sets us free. We are free—no ifs, ands or buts. Jesus said we would know the truth and would be free indeed. Let’s see if he was right.
About Key Life Network
Because life is hard for everyone, grace is for all of us. And grace means that because of what Jesus has done, when you run to him, God’s not mad at you.
All of the radio shows, sermons, books, and videos we produce work together toward one mission: to get you and those you love Home with radical freedom, infectious joy and surprising faithfulness to Christ as your crowning achievement.
Learn more: http://www.keylife.org
About Steve Brown
He’s not your mother and he’s not your guru. He’s Steve Brown - a speaker, author, former pastor and seminary professor, and founder of Key Life Network, Inc.
At Key Life, Steve serves as Bible teacher on the radio program Key Life and the host of the talk show Steve Brown, Etc. Prior to Key Life, Steve served as a pastor for more than thirty years and continues speaking extensively.
Steve has also authored numerous books, including How to Talk So People Will Listen, Three Free Sins, Hidden Agendas and his latest release, Talk the Walk: How to Be Right Without Being Insufferable (now available as an audiobook).
Contact Key Life Network with Steve Brown
steve@keylife.org
http://www.keylife.org/
P.O. Box 5000
Maitland, FL 32794
In Canada, send requests to:
Key Life Canada
P.O. Box 28060
Waterloo, Ontario N2L 6J8
1-800-KEY-LIFE