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Steve Brown: False expectations about yourself will kill you. Let's talk about it on Key Life.

Matthew: That was Steve Brown. He's an author, seminary professor, and our teacher on Key Life, a program all about God's radical grace. We're committed to bringing you Bible teaching that's honest, straightforward, and street smart. Keep listening to hear truth that'll make you free.

Steve Brown: Thank you, Matthew. We were talking yesterday when we ended the broadcast about the importance of honesty and how being honest with one another, especially your brothers and sisters in Christ. Listen, if you're going to lie, lie to pagans. Don't lie to your brothers and sisters in Christ because they are the same as you are.

So start with yourself and then go to everybody else and every institution of which you're a part, and that includes the church, and look for the ego, the sin, the flaws, and the darkness. That doesn't mean we shouldn't have political or theological convictions or become so cynical that we believe no one can be trusted or praised.

Paul said this, and this is Philippians 4:8, "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." False expectations for yourself and from others will make you feel guilty because you think that others are so much better than you are.

It'll make you fearful because you think the anxiety about others knowing the truth about you is shared by nobody. Shamed, because you think that others haven't done shameful and stupid things and full of regret because you have this false idea that others do not need to have regret. And the reason I know all of this is because I'm talking about me.

Maybe the most dangerous and debilitating false expectation around us is the idea that facing the lie about false expectations will destroy us. It won't. The problem with false expectations is that maintaining them if positive or getting rid of them if negative can be a scary and difficult prospect.

I have a friend, his name is Lee Cloward, to whom I once said I would wake up some sleeping dogs in my life. At that time, I was dealing with some negative expectations which took me to a pretty dark place. Lee is my longtime friend, and he had been there and he'd done that. I joked with him that I had a gun and if I woke up those sleeping dogs and they tried to bite me, I was going to shoot them.

You know what Lee said? He said, "Steve, you don't need a gun. You're going to find out that those dogs don't have any teeth. They really don't." False expectations are lies. That which is false is always shattered by the truth, and Jesus said he was the truth. John 14:6. So wherever truth is discovered, accepted, spoken, or lived, Jesus is there.

We have been mostly talking about the first part of Jesus' statement to his disciples, that in the world you will have tribulation. So expect it. But don't forget about the good news in the rest of that text. Expect that too. Jesus said, "Be of good cheer. I have overcome the world."

Once one knows the truth of that statement and its power, it's a game changer. And because what Jesus said is true, those who follow him don't have to look away from truth, even unpleasant truth about oneself or others or the world. When we face the truth, our expectations become realistic and our lives grow simpler.

When we have expectations properly anchored in Christ who always delivers and invites us to expect it. Expect that you are forgiven. Expect that you're accepted. Expect that you're valued. Expect that you're covered and that you will get home before the dark. The one who has overcome the world has promised that to you. Now you can go out and play.

All right, I got another lie that's a part of this book and this has to do with the lies that discourage us. 1 Thessalonians 4:3 is a good place to start, "For this is the will of God, your sanctification." And this is the lie: You're not ever going to get better. You're never going to be kinder. You're never going to be more loving. You're never going to be more obedient, so deal with it.

I have some very good and surprising news for you. Contrary to what you think, what you've been told, and what you may believe, listen to me, you're going to get better. What I'm going to say on this broadcast is not a list of things to help you get better or a call for you to get more serious and work harder at getting better.

I'm going to talk about a simple statement about what God has promised to do and is doing in the life of every believer. God loves you just the way you are, but he loves you too much to leave you there. And that not leaving you there has very little to do with what you do or say or think or believe. It's something you really ought to know.

I've often said that I thought I would be better than I am by now. That's true. But let me tell you something else that's true. I am better. And in some ways, I'm a lot better than I'd hoped to be a spiritual giant by now and that hasn't happened. But I'm better. I didn't come to that conclusion on my own either.

God had to show me because I honestly didn't know. Do you know why he showed me? The nature of self-righteousness is that self-righteous people are unaware of their self-righteousness. We sometimes forget that righteous people aren't often aware of their righteousness either.

One reason God doesn't show us our goodness very often is the jerk factor. People who are better and know it can sometimes be arrogant and prideful, becoming an ego-driven jerk. When that happens, their righteousness morphs into self-righteousness and God would spare us of that.

So God doesn't reveal to us our growth often because he knows that if he gives us an inch, we'll take a mile. Or at least I would. We are of course talking about sanctification and that's the process of God's people becoming more loving, more faithful, and more righteous.

The problem with God's methodology of hiding our growth in godliness from us is that the flip side of not knowing can sometimes cause guilt and shame and fear and regret. When we understand how God works, that doesn't have to be our definition. For the Christian, awareness is the key.

Justification and its benefits require the one being justified be aware of their need to be justified. Redemption presupposes understanding the need for redemption and an awareness of what it means to be redeemed. If God left us there, and he didn't, we would be overwhelmed by our sins, fearful of the price we may pay for them, shamed when we think of our actions and thoughts, and regretful of having made such a mess.

The Christian faith starts with awareness, but not just plain awareness. Awareness that is given to us as the gift of the Holy Spirit. Awareness of growth, awareness of failure, awareness of sin. It's okay. You think about that. I'm out.

Matthew: Thank you, Steve. If you're just joining us, we're currently in a special teaching series exploring the biblical basis of Steve's new book called "God's Not Mad At You." You can order your copy right now at keylife.org/notmadbook or find it on Amazon.

A few years ago, I bought a new car and loved it. It came with a three-year warranty that covered absolutely everything. Do you know what happened on the first day of the fourth year? That stupid car fell apart. I don't know how or why. I may have offended a magician when I was little and that was my curse. Actually, I'm not sure of all the details, but as with most good illustrations, sometimes one must tweak the story.

Nevertheless, it works because people sometimes feel like their spiritual warranty has run out. I'm one of them. Well, that excerpt of course is from an article by Steve. You can find it in the new digital summer magazine. You'll also enjoy articles from Jerry Parries, Justin Holcomb, and Chad West. Get all of it on demand and for free at keylife.org/digitalmagazine.

And if you're wondering about our print magazine, it's still available. Go to keylife.org/freemagazine to claim your copy. By the way, if you've been blessed by the work of Key Life, would you join us in that work by giving? It's easy. You could charge a gift on your credit card or include a gift in your envelope. And of course, you can now give safely and securely by text.

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