Insight for Living

Bill Meyer: Today on Insight for Living, Chuck Swindoll continues his biographical series called Fascinating Stories of Forgotten Lives, with a penetrating look at family dynamics gone awry. Esau's story is shocking, heartbreaking, and surprisingly relevant. You see, Isaac and Rebecca waited 20 years for children. And then God blessed them with twins.

Imagine the irony, the chaos, and the joy. Well, it wasn't all neat and tidy. They had their hands full, especially with Esau, who lived in the shadow of his brother and grew to resent him. Chuck titled his message Esau: The Son Who Couldn't Win.

Chuck Swindoll: I want us to study in this particular story the life of a man named Esau. I'm calling him the son who couldn't win. And I have a feeling in all honesty that some of you hearing this story, some of you for the first time hearing this story, will have little difficulty identifying with some of the struggles Esau had.

My Bible is open to Genesis 25:19, which is one of the earlier references to the genealogy of Esau. Let's say a word to begin with about his birth and childhood. These are the records of the generations of Isaac, Abraham's son. Abraham became the father of Isaac, and Isaac was 40 years old when he took Rebecca, the daughter of Bethuel.

Verse 21: Isaac prayed to the Lord on behalf of his wife because she was barren, and the Lord answered him, and Rebecca, his wife, conceived. Before I go any further, let me put to rest a misunderstanding. The immediate thought after you read verses 20 and 21 of Genesis 25 is that shortly after Isaac prayed, God caused her to conceive. Wrong. You remember reading that he was 40 years old when they married? Look at verse 26, the last line: Isaac was 60 years old when she gave birth.

Let's go back to verse 22. The children struggled together within Rebecca. And she said, "If it is so, then why am I this way?" So she went to inquire of the Lord. There were wrestlings within her womb. There are mysteries known only to a mother that are known to no one else. And she felt within her changes and conflicts and struggles going on within her.

She had no idea that she had the makings of a war within her own body. And so she inquired of the Lord, and in those days the Lord spoke audibly to those who inquired of him. And he said to her, "You don't simply have two children. You have the roots of two nations in your womb. Two peoples shall be separated from your body. One people shall be stronger than the other. Now note this: and the older shall serve the younger."

She discovered from God's voice that not only was she to have a baby, she was to have two children. And that the conflict within her womb was by the design of God. She's told these will not be simply two children, they will be nations, and the younger will, as a matter of fact, be the most dominant. The older will serve the younger.

When her days to be delivered were fulfilled, behold, there were twins in her womb. And the first came forth red all over like a hairy garment, and they named him Esau. So he's the older. And afterward, his brother came forth with his hand holding on to Esau's heel. So his name was called Jacob. And Isaac was 60 years old when she gave birth to them.

We're not told much about the childhood. We're told when the boys grew up, Esau was different from his younger brother Jacob. Esau became a skillful hunter, a man of the field. Jacob was a peaceful man living in tents. Nothing wrong with that. That's the way God designs them. But something is wrong in the next verse. And humanly speaking, it is the seed of great difficulty.

Isaac loved Esau, but Rebecca loved Jacob. Isaac loved Esau because he had a taste for game. I suppose Isaac was the outdoors type. He liked it that his boy liked to hunt. He liked the way his boy conducted himself and handled himself. He was a man. He was rugged. Rebecca liked it that Jacob stayed near the tent. Maybe he liked to cook. He stayed around the house, we would say. He didn't like the field.

Nothing wrong with the boys being different, but there is something wrong with this parental favoritism, which by the way haunts Esau's steps for the balance of his life. When Jacob had cooked stew, Esau came in from the field and he was famished. And Esau said to Jacob, "Please let me have a swallow of that red stuff there, for I am famished."

Jacob said, "First sell me your birthright." And Esau said, "Behold, I am about to die. So of what use then is the birthright to me?" Jacob said, "First swear to me." So he swore to him and sold his birthright to Jacob. Jacob gave Esau bread and lentil stew, and he ate and drank and rose and went on his way.

The chapter concludes with a brief commentary on the mentality of this older son: Esau despised his birthright. In a hurried moment of hunger where he says, "I'm famished," he trades his birthright and all of those blessings for a bowl of soup. It is the problem of instant gratification. And when we come to the end of this message, I'll say more about that.

But he bases an enormous amount of this decision on that instant moment of finding himself satisfied with a bowl of soup. He releases all of those blessings to his brother. Jacob, by the way, has been pictured by some as a man who deceived his brother out of his birthright. I don't find any deception right here. Oh, later I find deception, but this is out in the open.

You want a bowl of my soup, give me your birthright. Jacob was bright, but he wasn't here deceptive. I'll give you the soup if you give me your birthright. He didn't hide the fact that it was an out-and-out trade. The point I want to make is that Esau is of such a mind as to despise something that is significant and heavy for the satisfaction of his physical needs.

Jacob takes advantage of it. I think Jacob was a better student of Esau than Esau was of Jacob. Tells us something of his perspective. Spiritual priorities weren't nearly as important as physical comforts. Intangibles meant little to Esau. He saw only the need of the moment, and that was to fill his stomach.

Perhaps that's why Hebrews 12:16 refers to Esau as a profane man. By the way, let's don't just go through the story, let the story go through us. You may have a boy like Esau, or you may have a boy like Jacob. Pay close attention to what there is to learn from this interesting conflict between the two sons.

What we are witnessing in the end of chapter 25 are the early seeds of a carnal nature and a lack of parental guidance and confrontation. I'm convinced the parents didn't even know about the trade. By now, Isaac must be 75. It says in verse 27, "when the boys grew up," giving them the benefit of the doubt, let's place Esau at age 15. If you make him 20, then Isaac is now 80.

And age has a way of removing a father from the immediacy of his son's needs. One of the problems you have to deal with if you are an older father with younger boys or younger girls. Isaac becomes increasingly less involved in his children's lives. He sort of watches life pass, but he doesn't get involved with their needs.

Chapter 26, verse 34 is our next stop-off. When Esau was 40 years old, does that have a familiar ring? That's when Isaac married. When Esau was 40 years old, he married Judith, the daughter of Beeri the Hittite, and Basemath, the daughter of Elon the Hittite, two daughters of Heth. And they brought grief to Isaac and Rebecca.

We have noted that Isaac was 40 when he married. I wonder, and it's just passing imagination, it is not inspired, it is just a thought, just a suggestion. I wonder if by now Esau realized he was out of the loop of parental affection, or at least his mother's affection. I wonder if he thought there might be something that could be gained by seeking a wife at this age.

Something that would get him back in the loop of favor and blessing. And so at age 40, like his father, he marries. But he marries Canaanitish women, as they're later called, daughters of Heth. He loses again. And as is customary in those homes, he brings those wives with him back under the roof of his family, and they become a heartache to both his father and his mother.

He cannot win. By the way, if you are out of the loop of blessing and favor, a marriage will not help. Finding a wife or finding a husband will not automatically solve the conflict you have with your parents. Certainly finding wives like Esau did did not do it. And one more word of a practical note.

Only those whose family has been hurt by an unhappy marriage can understand fully the meaning of verse 35, that they brought grief to Isaac and Rebecca. Haven't you seen it, or have you experienced it? Where your son or your daughter makes an unwise choice and, as it were, brings home someone out of your favor? There's a grief connected with that that isn't healed.

Now, chapter 27 is clearly the most significant chapter in the story of the boy, or the son who couldn't win. I want to take our time through it. Not too much, but enough for you to see four scenes as they unfold. Much of this is familiar, I understand, but the first scene is Isaac and Esau, the older boy.

It came about when Isaac was old and his eyes were too dim to see that he called his older son Esau and said to him, "My son." And Esau said to the father, "Here I am, here I am." Isaac said, "Behold, now I am old and I do not know the day of my death. Now then, please take your gear, your quiver and your bow, and go out to the field and hunt game for me.

And prepare a savory dish for me such as I love and bring it to me that I may eat, so that my soul may bless you before I die." See, the father knows nothing of the exchange of the birthright. He's looking forward to passing the blessing on to his older son, whom he favors. So he says to the boy, "Let's eat this meal together that I might be strengthened and I might pass along the blessing."

Rebecca was listening. Now, this is an interesting study also, this woman. Or I should say the wife of Isaac, I should speak of her with a little more respect. Isaac's wife Rebecca is listening while Isaac spoke to his son Esau. So when Esau went to the field to hunt for game to bring home, Rebecca said to her son Jacob, did you catch something that I read?

While Isaac spoke to his son Esau, she later spoke to her son Jacob. Both of them are both their sons, but the favoritism by now is so strong, one is referred to as one's son, the other one is referred to as the other's son. What we have in this next section, 5 through 17, scene 2, is Rebecca and Jacob.

Now you will see a conniving spirit at work. Rebecca said to her son Jacob, "Behold, I heard your father speak to your brother Esau saying, 'Bring me some game and prepare a savory dish for me that I may eat and bless you in the presence of the Lord before my death.' Now therefore, my son, listen to me as I command you.

Go now to the flock and bring me two choice kids from there, that is two goats, that I may prepare them as a savory dish for your father such as he loves. Then you shall bring it to your father that he may eat, so he may bless you before his death." Jacob answered his mother Rebecca, "Behold, Esau my brother is a hairy man, and I am a smooth man.

Perhaps my father will feel me, then I shall be as a deceiver in his sight, and I shall bring upon myself a curse and not a blessing." Oh, she's got that all thought through. His mother said to him, "Your curse be on me, my son. Only obey my voice. Go and get them for me." So he went and got them and brought them to his mother, and his mother made savory food such as his father loved.

Rebecca took the best garments of Esau her eldest son, which were with her in the house, and put them on Jacob her younger son. She even dressed her boy in his twin brother's clothing. She put the skins of the kids on his hands. Can you picture that? And on the smooth part of his neck. What a strange plan.

She put the skins of the kids on his hands and on his neck. She also gave the savory food and the bread which she had made to her son Jacob. Scene 3, verses 18 to 29: Jacob and Isaac, his father. Then he came to his father and said, "My father." And he said, "Here I am. Who are you, my son?" You see, he's almost blind.

Jacob said to his father, "I am Esau, your firstborn." Now you see Jacob as a true deceiver. "I have done as you told me. Get up, please, and sit and eat of my game that you may bless me." Isaac said to his son, "How is it that you have it so quickly, my son?" He said, "Because the Lord your God caused it to happen to me."

Wow. When you have begun to deceive and you take it far enough, it won't be long before you can even enter the name of the Lord in your game plan without hesitation. Isaac said to Jacob, "Please come close that I may feel you, my son. Whether you are really my son Esau or not." Jacob came close to Isaac his father, and he felt him and said, "The voice is the voice of Jacob, but the hands are the hands of Esau."

He did not recognize him because his hands were hairy like his brother Esau's hands. So he blessed him. And he said, "Are you really my son Esau?" He said, "I am." Just a moment before we proceed. Jacob learned to deceive from his mother. He picked it up from her. To be sure, he has a nature of deception which you see as far back as the action in the womb when he is coming out of the womb, he's grasping the heel of the brother Esau, the older brother.

But he's learned the plot from his mother. He's learned the script from his mother. And he's not hesitating to carry it the full nine yards because he's been coached by his mother. Never underestimate the impact of your character on your children. So he said, "Bring it to me and I will eat of my son's games that I may bless you," and he brought it to him and he ate and brought him wine and he drank.

And his father Isaac said to him, "Please come close and kiss me, my son." So he came close and he kissed him. And when he smelled the smell of his garments, he blessed him. See, she even knew he would do that. When you're blind, your senses, your other senses are heightened. She knew his smell would be good, his ability to smell would be acute, and so she dressed him in the other boy's garment.

And he blessed him and said, "See, the smell of my son is like the smell of a field which the Lord has blessed." And he gives the blessing to him in verses 27, 28, and 29. Scene 4 begins at verse 30 and takes us through verse 40, and as you can imagine, it is Esau the older with his father Isaac. It's a tragic scene.

All the while this deception has been going on, Esau's been out in the field trying to find game. He has located game and he has killed it and he's brought it back in hopes of receiving the blessing from his father. Verse 30: It came about, as soon as Isaac had finished blessing Jacob, Jacob had hardly gone out from the presence of Isaac his father that Esau his brother came in from hunting.

He also made savory food and brought it to his father, and he said to his father, "Let my father arise and eat of his son's game so that you may bless me." And Isaac his father said to him, "Who are you?" And he said, "I am your son, your firstborn, Esau." Isaac trembled violently and said, "Who was he then that hunted game and brought it to me so that I ate of all of it before you came and blessed him?

Yes, and he shall be blessed." When Esau heard the words of his father, now watch this pathetic scene. He cried out with an exceeding great and bitter cry and said to his father, "Bless me, even me also, oh my father." He's now pleading for the blessing. And he said, "Your brother came deceitfully and has taken away your blessing."

And he said, "Is he not rightly named Jacob? For he has supplanted me these two times. He took away my birthright, and now, behold, now he has taken away my blessing." And he said, "Have you not reserved a blessing for me?" Isaac answered and said to Esau, "Behold, I have made him your master and all his relatives I have given to him as servants.

With grain and new wine I have sustained him. Now as for you then, what can I do, my son?" And Esau said to his father, "Do you have only one blessing, my father? Bless me, even me also, oh my father." So Esau lifted up his voice and wept. Isaac's words follow, and then Esau's tragic response.

Verse 41: Esau naturally bore a grudge against Jacob because of the blessing with which his father had blessed him. And Esau said to himself, "The days of mourning for my father are near, then I will kill my brother Jacob." Just look at that for a moment. Let's don't leave this quickly. It's a scene that's sort of a mixture of pathos and tragedy and irresponsibility and deception.

Yes, Esau is getting what he had coming if you look at it strictly theologically. He passed off the birthright for a bowl of soup. And now he looks at the whole thing as it has unfolded and he says, "My dad will be dead soon, and when he dies, I will get back at Jacob." Remember the prophecy that had been made to the mother before she even gave birth?

Two nations are in your womb, they will be separated from one another, and the older shall serve the younger, and it's beginning to transpire. Esau cannot win.

Bill Meyer: It's a pathetic moment in the life of Esau, and it's an essential part of his story, not to mention Jacob's and their family story as well. You're listening to Insight for Living, and we're midway through a biographical study from Chuck Swindoll. Today's topic, Esau: The Son Who Couldn't Win.

This study is just one in a larger collection of Bible studies. Chuck titled the series Fascinating Stories of Forgotten Lives. He focuses on the often overlooked characters of Scripture. These ordinary people whose complex stories and lives accomplished God's purposes proved that true significance comes from serving Christ, not personal gain.

Some, like Esau, expose common pitfalls that keep us from God's best. But in the end, regardless of our missteps, God is waiting with open arms, ready to forgive us and prepared to redeem our story. This series of biographical sketches speaks to every believer, whether you've walked with Christ for decades or you've just begun your journey.

At its heart is a life-changing message: God sees you, loves you, and knows what you're contributing to His kingdom. To explore these men and women more fully, visit insight.org/offer. There you'll discover a range of study resources designed to help you dig deeper. The title of Chuck's 14-part series is Fascinating Stories of Forgotten Lives.

While you're at our website, you'll see the Bible study workbook for this series from our Searching the Scriptures Bible studies. This interactive spiral-bound workbook allows you to take notes and record your own personal observations. There's a lot to check out at insight.org.

In fact, one of our listeners explained how his pastor mentioned Chuck in a sermon and cited Chuck as a strong influence on his life. As a result, this man searched online for resources. He said, "I've been glued to the Insight app and website ever since. You have so many great resources."

To purchase the Bible study workbook for this series, call us at 800-772-8888 or go online to insight.org/offer. I'm Bill Meyer, urging you to listen when Chuck Swindoll describes Esau: The Son Who Couldn't Win, tomorrow on Insight for Living.

The preceding message, Esau: The Son Who Couldn't Win, was copyrighted in 1990, 1992, 2001, 2006, 2012, and 2024, and the sound recording was copyrighted in 2024 by Charles R. Swindoll, Inc. All rights are reserved worldwide. Duplication of copyrighted material for commercial use is strictly prohibited.