Stepmom: Respecting Dad
June 9, 2017
00:00
The song “Respect” may have been made famous by Aretha Franklin, but the lyrics were written by a man!
Ladies, it may be true that the quickest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, but the best way to keep his heart is with your respect. Respect to a man communicates admiration and appreciation, both of which spell love. What does Paul tell wives to do in Ephesians 5 in the Bible? Well, he tells husbands to love their wives but he tells wives to respect their husbands. Find a way today to communicate respect to your husband. Thank him and tell him what you admire about him.
Featured Offer
Blended & Blessed®
Blended & Blessed® is the only one-day live event and livestream just for stepfamily couples, dating couples with kids, and those who care about blended families. Join sites around the globe on April 27th, 2024 as we unpack strategies that are crucial to building unity in your stepfamily. With some of today’s most trusted and respected experts, Blended & Blessed will challenge, inspire, and encourage you.
Archives
Okay, this is going to sound a little strange, but no; don’t try to be the knight in shining armor.
Romance novels and movies often characterize men as a knight who rides in and sweeps the woman off her feet and into wedded bliss. Many stepdads I know have also tried to fix all the wrongs for their stepchildren. I know it sounds strange but if you try to fix all the problems that other people have created, people may end up turning on you. Come alongside the kids, stepdad, embrace them and try to be a steady, positive influence over time—not the knight in shining armor. Just love them.
June 8, 2017
Yellow flashing lights mean proceed with caution.
Christine’s 16-year-old daughter was having emotional difficulties, but Christine’s boyfriend wasn’t very patient. In fact, he blamed her for keeping them from getting married. Even though Christine was in love and felt their “coupleness” was a good fit I suggested there was a huge flashing yellow light in front of her. He’s not mindful of your daughter. "Familyness” yellow lights should bring caution to “coupleness.” Your kids need you to slow down and make sure the light isn’t turning red.
June 7, 2017
Parents, you’ve got to role with the changes.
A biological parent’s role changes over time. As a child matures we shift from telling young children, to teaching adolescents, to delegating or coaching young adults. A stepparent’s role might shift from being a babysitter to being an aunt or uncle, to being a bonus parent. Later life stepparents likely start and finish in a friend or mentor role with their adult stepchildren. How your role changes depends on a lot and it can be confusing. Let us help with the changing roles of stepparenting.
June 6, 2017
Spring weddings are just around the corner. So, how do you prepare to be a blended family?
One woman said, “Take your time in dating. Don’t rush things. Think about your kids before making decisions. They need to feel like they're part of the process, not just watching it. We went to counseling and included our kids. We made sure they had a voice. We got educated about stepparenting. At the very heart of it all, we relied on God. I don’t know how we could have made it if we didn’t have God at the center of everything we deal with on a daily basis.” That sounds like good advice to me.
June 5, 2017
So this guy runs up to me at one of my stepfamily conferences and asks, “What do I do about the ‘D & R’ tattooed on my forehead?”
Now, trust me there was no tattoo. He explained, “Do you remember the women in The Scarlett Letter? She committed adultery so the community put an “A” on her clothes so everyone knew what she did. It's like I have a D & R on my forehead: divorced and remarried. Everyone knows it and they look at me like I’m a horrible person. I said, “I hate it when people do that. The truth is we are all sinners and we all need a cross. Maybe Jesus changed the meaning of your tattoo to delivered and redeemed.”
June 2, 2017
Summer is here and for some of you it means the kids are switching homes. Would you like to know how to start it off right?
Helping your kids with the summer sleepover depends on whether you’re sending or receiving. If you’re sending a child schedule a pre-summer conference call with the other household to find out how to pack. Then send your child off with your permission to enjoy their time. If you’re on the receiving end, plan some special activities around their arrival. Now, whether you’re sending or receiving having a good attitude just might translate into a good attitude in your kids, too.
June 1, 2017
Do you want to win at life? Surround yourself with wise people.
Many times the book of Proverbs in the Bible says wise people are more savvy and able to rise above. Proverbs 24:6 says one reason for that is wise people surround themselves with wise people. “In an abundance of counselors,” it says, “There’s victory.” Hey, do you want to excel in life? In your marriage? Your parenting? In your stepfamily? Even in business? Surround yourself with wise Christian followers and let them speak truth into your life. For there is where you will find victory.
May 31, 2017
Have you ever tried to talk someone into loving you?
When two people marry and form a blended family they hope their children and extended family will become family. But what if a family member refuses to embrace the family? Now, that question frustrates me because I don’t have a good answer. How do you make someone love you who won’t? What you can do is pursue but don’t badger. Take what they give you and build on it. And, don't beat yourself up. Stay as close as they’ll allow you, and pray diligently while you wait for them to turn around.
May 30, 2017
“Now, I expect you to be courteous.”
Have you ever given that speech when you left your kids with a babysitter and you wanted them to mind their manners? When kids enter an adoptive family, a foster family, or a blended family their expectations of who’s in charge may be different than the adult’s. It’s really important to settle that question. In a stepfamily, the biological parent can set the tone. “I expect you to be courteous and respect your stepparent just like you would any authority figure.” Yeah, that ought to do it.
May 29, 2017
“I just don’t feel like his partner,” that’s what Barbara told me. David controlled all the money. She didn’t even know how much they had.
Sometimes when couples fight about money, they're really fighting about power and control. Barbara really needs her husband to trust her and see her as his partner. Without that she’s likely not going to feel good about any financial decision. If life has already beaten her up a bit the insecurity she feels about money is going to affect every aspect of her marriage. That’s a withdrawal their marital bank account can’t afford. To strengthen your marriage, learn about stepfamily money.
May 26, 2017
See More Episodes
Loading...
P
S
Listen to FamilyLife Blended® on
Amazon Echo
Learn How
Learn How
Featured Offer
Blended & Blessed®
Blended & Blessed® is the only one-day live event and livestream just for stepfamily couples, dating couples with kids, and those who care about blended families. Join sites around the globe on April 27th, 2024 as we unpack strategies that are crucial to building unity in your stepfamily. With some of today’s most trusted and respected experts, Blended & Blessed will challenge, inspire, and encourage you.