Destined for Victory

Paul Sheppard: In the literal sense, you need more than Jesus because Jesus needed more than Jesus. So if Jesus needed more than himself, what chance do you think you have making it through life and doing the will of God without cultivating a social support system?

Guest (Male): Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up. That's Ecclesiastes 4 verses 9 and 10, and this is Destined for Victory with Pastor Paul Sheppard.

Well, we've all fallen down, and we'll all fall down again. That's why it's so critical to have a support system of like-minded believers in Christ. As we take a closer look at the life of Christ today, remember even he did not live the Christian life alone. Remember to stop by pastorpaul.net to listen to any recent message on demand, including today's. That's pastorpaul.net. Subscribe to our podcast at Spotify or wherever you enjoy podcasts. Now let's listen to our Destined for Victory message, "Being Holy, Being Human."

Paul Sheppard: Did you not know that Jesus, although he was the son of God, all God, yet all man, was one who knew better than to be a lone ranger? Now, if anybody could have pulled off being a lone ranger, it would have been Jesus because he's God. But Jesus came to this earth and knew that in order to fulfill the purpose of his father, he needed to identify a social support system.

He knew that his message would be to humanity, his service would be to humanity. He knew that life was not just about himself; it was about other people. And he also knew that the Father would use other people not only for him to be a blessing to but for them to be a blessing to him.

Now, there are some Christians who think, in fact they sing songs, "You can have the whole world, just give me Jesus." May I suggest to you? I know what we mean when we sing that. It's one of the verses to "I Have Decided to Follow Jesus," you who grew up in church. You’ve got to go back for songs like that.

We who grew up in church: "I have decided to follow Jesus, no turning back, no turning back. The world behind me, the cross before me." Remember that? And then there was another verse that said, "You can have this whole world, just give me Jesus." I know what we mean, but let's just be literal for a moment.

In the literal sense, you need more than Jesus because Jesus needed more than Jesus. So if Jesus needed more than himself, what chance do you think you have making it through life and doing the will of God without cultivating a social support system? Let me just show you how it played out in the life of Jesus.

Jesus had several categories of people. He ministered to the masses, the "whosoever will," those who came, those who followed him, those who sat on the mountain side as he taught. He ministered to the masses. He ministered to people when they came saying, "Son of God, have mercy on me." He ministered to them. He gave of himself. He poured himself out in ministry. He ministered to the masses.

He trained the 70. There's one point at which it says he sent 70 people out two by two, and he trained them and he taught them how to serve, how to give of themselves, how to follow his example. And then you understand that he mentored the 12. He mentored the 12.

He took those 12 that he specifically called. He knew that they were going to be the apostles. They were going to form the foundation for the early church, and so he, in a very special way, spent time with them. They walked with him, they followed him, and he mentored them.

But let me tell you something else. He also had people in his life who were those people that you would identify as his friends. These are people that he wasn't just giving to, but these are people who were giving to him. A Dr. Richard Swenson, in his book *Margin*, refers to these kinds of people as "fillers versus drainers."

Everybody who is truly serving, especially if you've found your niche in ministry and you're doing the thing God has called you to do—and even if you're not formally serving—if you are a person who gives of yourself on your job, gives of yourself in your home to your children and your spouse and what have you, if you volunteer maybe in the community, and especially if you are involved in ministry in a church or para-church ministry context, you are familiar with the fact that giving causes you to be drained.

As you serve people's needs, as you take care of them, it drains you. And so God has so designed life that in order to handle the drain, you are to develop wisdom in the area of cultivating social support systems that will produce fillers so that you have something you can give when the drainers show up.

Have you ever met a Christian who is constantly drained, constantly giving, but doesn't have an adequate support system? What ends up happening is people like that become irritable. They become frustrated. They have trouble controlling their anger. I'm talking about Christians. Saved, some of them say, saved, sanctified, filled with the Holy Ghost.

They're stressed, they're fatigued, they're impatient, they're insecure. Some of them have a persecution complex, and it's all because they have violated the principle of balance. And unlike their savior, they have not invested enough time in developing a social support system.

Jesus didn't do that. He didn't just minister to the masses and teach the 70 and mentor his disciples, but he found people who he just would spend time with. And they are obviously the kinds of people that you connect with in a way that you feel stronger when you leave them than you were when you first got to them.

Whoever it is who makes you feel better when you're done spending time with them than before you showed up—that's a filler. Sometimes activities are fillers, part of your support system. Activities. Doing things that you can enjoy doing.

Now, in Jesus' life, we can clearly see perhaps he had activities, but we're not shown those in the pages of the Gospels. The Gospels tell us at one point that they couldn't possibly tell us every aspect of Jesus' life, but we have the essentials. But you do see some of the people who were fillers in his life.

There are six in particular. Three of them were also disciples: Peter, James, and John. When you read the account of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane in Matthew chapter 26, what you'll find is he took eight of the 11—Judas had already gone to betray him. He took the 11 with him in the garden, and then he said to eight of them, "Sit here. I'm going further to pray."

And eight of them sat there, and the Bible says he took Peter, James, and John and walked further. And said to them things he didn't say to the eight. He expressed his heart to them in a way he hadn't expressed it to the eight. He said to them, "My soul is exceedingly sorrowful unto death."

Fellas, I feel like I'm about to die. He wasn't talking about "I'm going to the cross." He means in this moment, I can hardly take the pressure of this moment, the imminent betrayal, which he knew, of course, was going to occur.

The fact that he was now staring at a night of torture and that ultimately, after being tortured to within inches of his physical life, he was going to hang on a cross and had done absolutely nothing wrong. And his humanity was experiencing the crisis of all of that. And he said to people he trusted, "I feel like I'm about to die."

These fellas not only were with him at that all-important moment, but earlier in his ministry, there were times he would hang out with them and he didn't hang out with all of the 12. Those were the three he took up on what we call the Mount of Transfiguration.

Remember that in the Gospels? Where Jesus went up on the mount and God gave him a wonderful experience in that moment, and God sent out of eternity, he sent Moses and Elijah, the law and the prophet. And Jesus was transfigured in front of these three fellas.

And Jesus was hanging out with Moses and Elijah, just talking. We don't know what they were saying, but they were hanging out having fellowship up there on that mount. And Peter, James, and John got to watch it. The others didn't. These were people who had a unique relationship with Jesus.

And I call them some of his fillers. There were three other people who were fillers that we know of: Mary, Martha, and Lazarus. When you look at John chapter 11, the story of Lazarus being sick and eventually dying and then Jesus raising him from the dead, notice I believe it's verse 5 that tells you that Jesus loved Mary and Martha and Lazarus.

Wait a minute. I thought Jesus loved everybody. What you mean he loved Mary, Martha, and Lazarus? Doesn't he love me? Yes, yes he does. Loved you so much he went to the cross for you. But that's not what he meant there.

What he meant there was he had a unique relationship with these people because they were fillers for him. They were people who left him stronger than they found him. When he would go to their house in Bethany—Bethany was a little village down about two miles down the road from Jerusalem—when he'd go to their house, he didn't go there to minister.

When you read that story in Luke chapter 10, you'll see the story of Jesus going to the village of Bethany and Martha opening her home to him and his disciples. Perhaps that was the beginning of a very close relationship when she first opened her home and they could come to fellowship and hang out.

In fact, in that story, you find Martha cooking. She's going to feed him, take care of him. And you find Mary sitting at his feet listening to him. And then you see it's downright comical because Martha, who wants to serve him, who wants to meet his needs, is focused on one thing. Mary's focused on quite another.

Mary is like, "Do you know who this is we have in our house? I want to hear everything he's got to say." And she found a seat by his feet, and she wanted to hear the word that came from his mouth. Nothing wrong with it. It's just that he didn't come to preach. He came to eat.

You know that because when he corrects Martha's emphasis, he's just saying, "You're troubled about many things. You've gotten yourself all worked up." Because you know what happened. Martha comes bursting out of the kitchen, and she says, "Lord, I'm in here cooking all by myself. Why don't you tell Mary to get up and come help me?"

Right there in your Bible. And she's frustrated. And you know how you get when you get frustrated. See, in that moment, she's out of balance. She's focused on, "I want to get this meal done right." But have you ever seen people who are so busy trying to be host or hostesses until they end up being rude?

You ever had that happen? They're trying to do a nice thing, but by the time their nerves are frayed, they're sick of everybody. By the time they invite you to the table, "Just come on, just sit down, just sit down." Well, wait now. I thought we supposed to have a little fun.

And so Martha had a good idea; she just didn't have a good execution plan. So by the time she comes out, she's frustrated. It's too late, man. She's going to lay into Jesus and Mary. She did. She's picking on Jesus. "Why don't you tell her? You're the one out here talking. If it wasn't for you out here talking—"

Let me tell you something, folks. We've got to understand that balanced living is the key, and part of that is finding fillers. We know these folks got that all straightened out and Jesus undoubtedly spent many wonderful times with them so that when you get to John 11, the writer just flat out says he loved them. He loved these people. They were special to him.

See, this is one of the things where people who are unbalanced spiritually have a problem because they think that if you're truly spiritual, everybody in your life is exactly the same and they don't understand that's not so. It wasn't so for Jesus, and it shouldn't be so for you.

Some folk in your life are there to drain you. It's called service. You give to them. It's not reciprocal. You're giving; they're taking. Come on now. Your children, you've got to serve their needs. You've got to train them in the fear and admonition of the Lord.

You've got to pay their bills and feed them and clothe them and teach them and go through their changes with them. Get through adolescence with them without losing your natural mind. Is that right? You working, man, it's thankless work. My mother for years, we heard her fussing, just fussing.

"I just do and do and do for you kids. Looks like it's never enough. Every time I turn around—" She was a giver. We were the takers. Our favorite word was "Ma!" Now listen. That's part of God's plan. And that's why if you're doing it right according to wisdom, you're training them, you're teaching them, you're working yourself out of a job.

Eventually they shouldn't need you in the way that they once did. If you're doing it right, that means you have served well enough, you put in your time—or some would call it doing time. You did your time, and the result is, the fruit of your labor is, you have a well-adjusted, hopefully spiritually-minded child who loves God, is ready now to go out into the world so that as you continue your relationship, you can enjoy watching them as they embark on life's journey.

And if your kids develop right, they'll respect and appreciate and love you more, or at least differently, after they've left your home or left your direct care. Because as they're growing up and becoming people who are drained, then they come to see how much you really did.

I loved my mother growing up, but after a while I was like, "Mom, you are really all right. You all right. Give me some dap. You all right." Because you have a different perspective later on as to how much they sacrificed in order to do for you.

But you've got to understand, some people are going to drain you because they need what God has put in you to give to them. And they're not there to serve you. And until you get this balance thing right, that's how you get frustrated with the wrong people sometimes.

And when you get mad at people whose job it is for you to serve them and love them and take care of them, you've missed God's wisdom. There are some people who are supposed to take from you, and if they never say thank you, you ought to know in your heart, "I did what God told me to do in their life."

And you've got to get that straight because there will be people in your life who you give the last ounce to them and they just walk away. "See ya." But God will set you up if you allow him. He'll bless you to cultivate a support system with people, with activities, whatever it takes to build you up.

Now you've got to know your temperament. That's part of the wisdom. You've got to know your temperament. My wife and I are very different when it comes to this. We've laughed about it over the years after we finally got it straight. We used to fuss about it a lot.

Eventually we came to laugh about it and to realize it. The way she gets filled is she needs a nice book and a couch and quiet. And she can delve into a book or maybe listen to a teaching CD of some woman that she really admires and she'll listen. She goes to a lot of these conferences.

She's now speaking in a lot of them and sharing as she's building a nice network of pastor's wives. She's got the things she knows what works for her. And so she'll go to the meeting she wants to go to. But at home when she really wants to be filled, she needs a book and a couch and quiet.

When I want to be filled, I need activity. See, I don't want to sit when I want to be filled. And she used to watch me, and I would preach a couple times a day and then come home Sunday afternoon and eat some lunch. And then I'm ready, "All right, where our friends? Let's go do something."

I want to do something because I've been working all day. I've been serving. I've been giving out. I want to get with some folk who are going to make me laugh; we can act stupid. And you’ve got to find your crew because not everybody's in the stupid crew.

Some folk, they catch you out, they say, "Oh, this is the pastor, I've been meaning to talk to him." And I'm out trying to have fun and you're asking me little Bible trivia questions. Trying to enjoy myself, and you're like, "Pastor, uh, can animals sin?" And I feel like saying, "No, but I can if you don't get out of my—"

And we had to learn. So after a while we used to fuss about it, and eventually we got in sync. And she learned to send me forth with her blessings. Because she knew that the very thing that would breathe life into me would finish her off.

"I've already been with the people. I'm ready now to get to my house." And so it's not right and wrong. You just got to know who you are. You’ve got to know who you are and be comfortable in your own skin and let it rejuvenate you so that you can continue to live a life that glorifies God.

Life is too short for you to neglect key areas of your life. And if you will strike the balance, God will be able to get more done in your life and you'll be able to finish your course with the "it is finished" testimony to the glory of God.

Guest (Male): Jesus didn't simply live a godly life. He taught others how to live that way. And the last command he ever gave was for us to go out into all the world and share the gospel with the nations. That's our primary purpose at Destined for Victory, and we need your help to get it done, especially during the busy summer months when donations tend to take a dip. With that in mind, Pastor Paul's wife, Meredith, has a few words she'd like to share with you during this critical season in the life of the Destined for Victory media ministry.

Meredith Sheppard: Hi, this is Meredith Sheppard. Pastor Paul was my beloved husband. I want to take a moment to thank every person who has supported Destined for Victory through your prayers and financial gifts. Your generosity allows us to continue bringing the life-changing message of Jesus Christ to listeners near and far. Many are encouraged, strengthened, and reminded of God's faithfulness because you chose to invest in this work.

We often hear from listeners who tell us that they heard Pastor Paul's message at just the right moment: a word of hope during a difficult season, a reminder of God's love when they felt alone, or a message that helped deepen their walk with Christ. Those moments are made possible through your partnership. As we look ahead, especially during these summer months, we invite you to continue standing with us.

The need for the gospel has never diminished, and every gift, large or small, helps keep these broadcasts on the air and extends our reach to those who are searching for hope and truth. If this ministry has been a blessing to you, or if you believe in the importance of sharing God's word through Destined for Victory, I would be honored by your continued support. Simply visit our donate page at pastorpaul.net/donate.

Together, we can continue proclaiming the good news and touching lives for the glory of God. Thank you for your faithfulness, your generosity, and your commitment to advancing God's kingdom. I thank God for you and pray his richest blessings upon you and your family.

Guest (Male): When you give generously today, we have a special gift to share with you as our way of saying thanks. Have you ever set out to be a servant but ended up making a scene? There's a great story in the Gospel of Luke about this very thing. Martha is busy making preparations, but her sister Mary isn't helping. Instead, she's spending time with Jesus, and Martha grows increasingly frustrated.

In her latest booklet, *When Humans Attack*, Pastor Paul takes an in-depth look at the story, contrasting Martha's distraction with Mary's devotion. If you've ever allowed unmet expectations to turn into a confrontation, this outstanding booklet will show you a better way. That's *When Humans Attack*, our thank-you gift this month when you make a generous donation to Destined for Victory.

You can give by phone by calling 855-339-5500. That's 855-339-5500. Or by visiting pastorpaul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. You can also mail your gift to Destined for Victory, Post Office Box 1767, Fremont, California 94538.

Paul Sheppard: In order to do the will of God, you're going to be serving the needs of people. You're going to be giving out. And one of the things you learn from Jesus is that he not only gave out, but he had the wisdom to receive what he needed so that he could continue to have resources to give out.

Guest (Male): That's next time in our Destined for Victory message, "Being Holy, Being Human." Until then, remember: He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are destined for victory.