Destined for Victory

Paul Sheppard: Paul said in Romans 12:1, "I present myself as a living sacrifice." So you got to know what you're presenting to God. You got to know who's that guy in the mirror. When you strip away his title, when you strip away what he does, when you strip away what he makes, when you strip away his claims to fame, who is he really? God is after who we really are.

Guest (Male): There are two of life's most frequently asked questions: Who am I? and Why am I here? But asking the questions is a little use unless we search for the answers. Hello and welcome to another great day here on Destined for Victory with Pastor Paul Sheppard.

Online, you'll find us at pastorpaul.net. There you can listen anytime to Destined for Victory on demand. That's pastorpaul.net. Now, here's today's Destined for Victory message, "Fatherhood by the Book."

Paul Sheppard: God has a unique plan for fathers to find their way into the center of His will and that dads are to make a difference according to God's plan. In order for that to happen, fathers, I'm challenging you with the Word of God. "Fatherhood by the Book" suggests that we got to get back to the Bible. We've got to get back to the Word of God. I want to continue to challenge you out of the Word.

Now let me remind women, I need you to be actively involved in this series. Don't tune out for a number of reasons. Number one, all of you have men in your sphere of influence that you can encourage with this kind of truth. You can pray for and support them if they're out of sync. If the men in your life are out of sync with God's plan and purpose, I hope to enlighten you as to what that is so you'll know how to help pray them into the will of God.

Some of you are raising young boys who are going to become men and fathers one day, and you need to be armed with this truth so that you can help equip and prepare them. Some of you single women, you want to marry a man and you hope to have kids with that man. You better tune in so you know what fatherhood looks like and you will know how to pick them better. Amen.

Some of y'all do some poor picking, then you want to drag them into the office after the fact. So we're trying to get you armed with the Word so you can know what a man living by the book looks like and you'll be prepared. Everybody needs to be involved in this, even if you're not a dad.

I began the series by challenging men to live by the Great Commandment. Build the foundation of your life on the Great Commandment. What is the Great Commandment? To love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and then to love your neighbor as yourself. So we talked about the importance of being a kingdom-first Christian, loving God, making the decision to set your affection on God.

Every man ought to understand that the head of every man is Christ. You can't be a man the way God has designed you to be until you're lined up under Christ. Your life is to be defined by your love for the Lord. And then we talked about the fact that the Great Commandment also suggests that you are to love your neighbor as yourself. In the context of fatherhood, you can't love your children properly until you have a right understanding of yourself and you present yourself rightly to God.

And so I ended the last message talking about the importance of men having right relationship with ourselves. You got to be in touch with yourself. If you want to be a good dad, you have to first be in touch with yourself. You got to know who you are really. You have to be willing to ask yourself the right questions so that you can get the right answers.

Now the challenge is, men tend to be external as we move throughout the world. Many of us are socialized to be external. We tend to get our identity from what we do rather than from who we are. And so this is a challenge for you from the Word, to be a man who has right relationship with himself lined up under God before you go to play the role of a father.

What that means is you got to be in touch with yourself. You got to know who you are. You got to be in touch with your weaknesses. You have to be in touch with your idiosyncrasies. You have to be in touch with your issues, if you will. You got to know what's going on inside of you. It's a challenge because we tend not to be introspective.

We tend to live our lives very externally. Men tend to identify themselves and value themselves by what they have, or the house they own, or the car they drive, or the career they have. We tend to get our identity from those things. But the reality is those things don't tell us who you are. And God is after changing who we are to conform us to the image of His Son, Jesus Christ.

But the only way you can be conformed to the image of His Son is you've got to present yourself. Paul said in Romans 12:1, "I present myself as a living sacrifice." So you got to know what you're presenting to God. You got to know who's that guy in the mirror. When you strip away his title, when you strip away what he does, when you strip away what he makes, when you strip away his claims to fame, who is he really?

God is after who we really are. So we've got to learn to deal with the real gut-level issues that are going on inside of us. And so I encouraged you as I ended the last message, strip away the mask and become familiar with who you really are. Don't try to be a superhero and deceive yourself. Don't be the only person in your sphere of influence who is unaware of who you really are. You need to know who you really are.

So you got to learn to ask yourself tough questions about who you are. Am I loyal or disloyal? Am I truthful or am I dishonest? Am I generous? Am I stingy? Am I conceited or am I humble? Do I follow through on my commitments? Am I disorganized, unfocused, a procrastinator? Are past events still haunting me?

Was I molested as a boy? Was I humiliated by bullies and people who picked on me? Was I abandoned? If so, what are the impacts? How am I acting out of my pain, of my shame? Do I have secret sins? Are there things about me that if people knew it, they would be shocked? Are there perversions hidden down inside of me? Sometimes screaming to get let out and I'm not sure what to do about them.

I dare not tell anybody because I don't want them to think of me as some sort of pervert. Do I have addictions that I'm trying desperately to hide from others, but they're slowly destroying my life? Have I been betrayed or let down by someone I trusted and depended on?

If so, what is the way I'm acting out? Am I betraying others and letting others down? Am I jealous? Am I insecure? Am I abusive? Am I distrustful? Am I angry? Am I unkind? Am I vengeful? Am I arrogant? Am I lonely? Am I fearful?

These are the kinds of questions that will help a man get in touch with himself. Because if you don't ask the right questions, you don't get the right answers. And you got to learn to go there. You got to learn to go there. The reason why I'm challenging you man to go there is because when you're willing to go there, you will find that God will meet you there.

God will meet you at the place of the answers to those questions. Even if the answer produces shame or guilt or conviction, it is a place where God wants to meet you. Why? Because His plan is to transform us. God can't get you to where He has designed you to be until you let Him meet you where you really are.

So you don't ask God to meet you at your reputation. Because He won't meet you there because He knows you're not that. He will not meet you at the point of your boasting, your bragging. He'll only meet you at the point of your honesty. So you got to be willing to ask the right questions.

You also got to be willing to listen when other people answer the questions even if you didn't ask them. Every married man knows what it's like to have your wife answer a question you didn't ask her, related to who you are, what she thinks about you, or your weaknesses, or your problems, or whatever it is. It's just in her nature.

See, I told you in the last message, women tend to exhale and they don't just exhale about themselves, they will exhale about you. But when she exhales about you to you, you've got to be willing to say, "Well Lord, I want to be like You." So even though I don't like this and you might not appreciate when it's coming up or why it's coming up or how it's coming up, you want to walk away from that experience saying, "Lord, I don't want to turn a deaf ear to truth."

Because I know that You are in this thing to change me. And I cannot change and be conformed to the image of Your Son until I'm willing to let You meet me at the point where I really am. God will meet you where you really are and He will transform you. You don't believe me? Ask Jacob.

Guest (Male): Don't go away. The rest of today's Destined for Victory message featuring Pastor Paul Sheppard is coming right up. In John 14:6, Jesus said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." And our mission at Destined for Victory is to share that timeless truth, Jesus himself, so that as many people as possible can be saved.

The summertime is especially critical for ministries like Destined for Victory who often see giving go down during this season of the year. You can help keep these messages coming your way all year round by sending a generous gift today. Stop by pastorpaul.net to make a safe and secure donation right there online. That's pastorpaul.net. Or you can call 855-339-5500.

Well, he made a mess of things from day one, but God never gave up on him. Part of his story comes your way now in the second half of today's Destined for Victory message, "Fatherhood by the Book."

Paul Sheppard: When you read the Bible, your Bible is full of transformed men. It's not full of perfect men. The only perfect one you'll find in the Bible is Jesus. All the rest of them are like you. Men who were a mess, but God met them in their mess and said, "I'm going to walk you out of this. I've got a plan and purpose. In fact, I'm not going to call you what you're acting like, I'm going to call you what I destined you to be. And I'm going to walk with you out of this, and I'm going to make you the man that I have destined you to be."

Jacob is a prime example. Jacob was a mess from day one. When I say day one, that's not just a cliché. Jacob was literally a mess from day one, the day he came out of his mama's womb. Read it, Book of Genesis, when you get a chance. Jacob came out, he was a twin, he was the second twin out of his mother's womb.

The Bible says Esau came out first and when Jacob followed him, he had his brother by the heel. You knew it was going to be trouble in that family. Had him by the heel. They named him what he was by natural character. They named him Jacob. That means trickster, deceiver, supplanter, con artist. And he lived that out.

I told you we're sinners by nature. The Bible says we're born in sin. And when you grow up, you simply begin to act out of that sinful nature and you become a sinner by nurture, by development. And whatever you practice, you get good at. And Jacob practiced being deceptive and dishonest and a con artist and he got really good. He came from tricky roots. His mama was tricky.

His mama was tricky. In fact, later on in his life she gets in cahoots with him, and a mama and a tricky boy plot against that woman's son and that boy's twin brother. Talk about a dysfunctional family. But those stories are in the Bible to let you know that God can change anybody. And Jacob was a mess. You know the story of how he tricked his brother out of his birthright.

One day Esau came in from the open country having been out hunting. He came in famished, feeling that he was going to die of starvation or dehydration, and all he really needed to do was get some water in his system and relax, get in some shade and what have you, so that he could avoid heat stroke and all of that. But he saw his brother cooking and he said, "If I can just get some of this food I'll be okay." And you got to be careful when you are starving and the devil is cooking.

Jacob was cooking some stew and Esau said, "Man, I'm about to die. Would you give me some of that stew?" Jacob said, "No problem, I'll hook you up. Just give me your birthright." Now a birthright meant that the eldest son, in this case the first of the twin boys, the first one who came out is considered the eldest, the eldest son is entitled to twice the inheritance if there are two boys because the eldest is going to have the responsibility of taking the family enterprise and the family name into the next generation.

And so bearing that responsibility, he also had the privilege of twice the inheritance. And Jacob wanted what was coming to Esau. And he conned him out of it. You know you're a con man when you can make a bowl of stew sound like it is a worthwhile trade for a lifetime of blessing. But you know you who are con artists, you can pull that off. You know how to sell Evian to a drowning man.

You just know how to pull it off. Some of y'all just tricky like that. I know you look cute now, got your church clothes on, Bible. But some of y'all just have that in you. You can work it, male and female. You can work it. And that's the way Jacob was. And Esau said, "Hey, if I'm dead, the inheritance won't do me any good so I might as well just go ahead and give it up." And so Jacob took his brother's birthright.

Later on he and his mama got together and tricked him out of his blessing as well. That's the blessing of the father before he dies. He imparted a blessing to his children. And they dressed Jacob up as though he were Esau. Isaac's eyes were getting bad, he could hardly see. And so they tricked him and fooled him and made him feel and smell like Esau.

And Isaac said, "Is this Esau?" It didn't feel right. But both Rebecca and Jacob said, "Yeah honey, yeah that's him." And stole that blessing as well. Listen let me tell you something, your stuff, whatever is in you is coming out. That's why sooner or later you got to deal with it because if it's in your nature, if it's in there, it's going to find ways to manifest itself.

And his trickiness just kept coming out throughout his life. He's getting his brother more and more angry until finally his brother said, "I'm going to kill him." And his mother, who is overprotective of him and who is tricky like him and doesn't want her tricky son dead, she says, "You better go on down to your Uncle Laban's house because Esau's mad at you."

And so Jacob's on the run from his brother. Goes down to Laban. But you see, what goes around comes around. And see, when you are tricky, you got to understand there's always somebody trickier than you. And Uncle Laban was a trickster for sure. And he had more years of being tricky. Jacob had a bachelor's in trickiness but Laban had a PhD.

Laban saw his nephew come down there, his nephew got down there and he saw his daughter Rachel. He said, "The Lord is my shepherd, I see what I want. I want to marry your daughter Rachel. She is fine." And Laban said, "No problem, but you got to work for me for seven years." Jacob said, "You got a deal."

He started working for him. The Bible says there's an astounding sentence in the story that says those seven years seemed but a few days to Jacob because of how much he loved Rachel. The single sisters said, "That's what I'm talking about. Seven years just felt like just nothing, just doing a little quick time because of how much he loved her."

Seven years later he says, "All right, it's time for us to get married." Laban said, "No problem, let's have the feast, let's have the celebration." And all of that, and they celebrate. But the night of the wedding, the night that it was to be consummated, the bride customarily was introduced into the chambers in darkness or under veil in such a way that she would not be seen.

And so here he is, he embraces this woman he has worked seven years for or so he thinks. And he makes love to her through the night. In the morning he wakes up, the morning light appears, and lo and behold it is not Rachel, it is her sister Leah. That brother came out of that tent looking for Uncle Laban. "What did you do?" Laban said, "Oh you mean I didn't tell you? You can't marry my younger daughter till the oldest one is married first.

I know you want Rachel, but the only way you can have Rachel is you have to marry Leah first." And that first seven years, those weren't Rachel years, those were Leah years. Told you man, he's tricky. Now if you want Rachel, and I know you do, that's another seven years. You got to watch out because your sins are going to come back.

But here's the good news. One day Jacob got sick of himself. You got to get to know who you are. And when you get to know enough of who you are, sooner or later you get tired of who you are. Everybody, man, woman, everybody, sooner or later the best blessing you can come upon is the blessing of getting sick of you.

Some of y'all, your biggest problem now is that you love you, which is proof you don't know you. You are blindly out of touch. You are living in ignorant bliss. But you're also living outside of the wonderful opportunity you have to live your life in the center of God's will.

And the only way you can get in the center of His will is you got to go by way of honesty and self-awareness so that when you make your Romans 12 presentation of yourself to God, you know exactly who you're presenting. And Jacob got so sick of himself, got sick of being tricky, got sick of deceiving folks, got sick of the consequences of it, can't even go back home, can't be around his kinfolk because his brother will kill him when he sees him.

And he got tired of himself. "Lord I got to change!" And one night when he was in this season, God sent an angel to see if he's really ready to change. Angel stopped by. And when he saw that he had a heavenly being, the Bible says he grabbed him and began to wrestle with him. He said, "I have to be blessed and you come from the place where my blessing is. And so I'm going to hold you hostage."

The Bible says he wrestled with the angel till the breaking of day and said, "I will not let you go till you bless me." That's where somebody's got to get. You got to get before God and say, "Lord we're going to wrestle this thing out until I'm blessed." The Bible says when that was over, not only did the Lord bless him, but the Lord changed his name from Jacob to Israel. He went from trickster to prince with God.

Guest (Male): You don't have to fight with God to be transformed, but you can. God is willing to do whatever it takes to mold you into the man He created you to be. The question is: are you?

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Well we've got a very special gift to share with you today. For the first time ever, "Let My People Smile" is available in video format. "Let My People Smile" has long been a huge favorite among our listening friends and partners because it features Pastor Paul's unique blend of humor with his biblical wisdom. But now you can see these great teaching clips on video.

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Paul Sheppard: The Bible challenges fathers to be present. You were present in the making of the child and that's because God designed it so that you had to be involved because He was showing you by His very design, if it takes two to raise them then He's not giving you a pass once you've made the child. If you want to be a man after God's own heart, you've got to understand that God has called you to be present in the lives of your children.

Guest (Male): And that is next time in our continuing message, "Fatherhood by the Book." Until then, remember, He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion in Christ. You are destined for victory.