Destined for Victory

Guest (Male): Hello and thanks for being here with us on Destined for Victory featuring Pastor Paul Sheppard. Before we get going with today's message, "Can't We All Just Get Along," I want to share a conversation I once had with Pastor Paul. I spoke with him about Destined for Victory's long-standing objective to reach the world for Christ, a mission he hoped would continue long after his preaching days were over. Here's what he had to say.

Paul Sheppard: You know, when I think of victorious, my mind goes back. I'm a kid growing up watching TV in the 60s. So my mind goes back to the Wide World of Sports. There was an announcer named James McKay, Jim McKay, something like that.

He had this classic line where he talked about the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. I love just thinking about how thrilling it is to be victorious. I love in any game I'm playing, I want to be victorious. I tell people I don't care whether it's Monopoly or something really serious. I want to win.

In life, we can win in Christ. That's what the Bible tells us, that we are victorious in Him. Victorious means that we're following His lead, that we're letting the Holy Spirit take us where He wants us to go in life. We're saved by His grace and then we're simply following His direction.

Of course, the word of God is so key to following God's direction because the word is a lamp to our feet and a light to our pathway. So those who tune in to broadcasts like Destined for Victory are really supposed to be receiving guidance so that we can walk in and live in victory. That's what I pray is happening as people tune in day by day.

Guest (Male): We say it every day, "In Christ, you are destined for victory." Our prayer is that you will live the victorious Christian life today and every day until the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Well, we've got a great thank-you gift to share with you today. Yours when you make a generous donation to Destined for Victory. It's our booklet, "Access Granted." Based on the first eight verses of Romans Chapter 5, this great resource examines what it means to be justified by faith.

And it's because of this new relationship with God that believers have access to blessings like grace, peace, hope, even in the midst of trials or suffering. Again, it's called "Access Granted," and it's our gift to you today by request for your generous gift to Destined for Victory.

You can give that gift by phone by calling 855-339-5500. That's 855-339-5500, or visit PastorPaul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. One more option: you can mail your gift to Destined for Victory, Post Office Box 1767, Fremont, California 94538.

Romans Chapter 14, beginning with Verse 13. Therefore, let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way. As one who is in the Lord Jesus, I am fully convinced that no food is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, for him it is unclean.

If your brother is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love. Do not by your eating destroy your brother for whom Christ died. Do not allow what you consider good to be spoken of as evil. For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit.

Because anyone who serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and approved by men. Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. Do not destroy the work of God for the sake of food. For all food is clean, but it is wrong for a man to eat anything that causes someone else to stumble.

It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother to fall. So whatever you believe about these things, keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what he approves. But the man who has doubts is condemned if he eats because his eating is not from faith. And everything that does not come from faith is sin.

Paul Sheppard: We conclude the series entitled "Can't We All Just Get Along?" As Paul gives this thrust here in Romans 14, we've discovered that his goal is to help the church practice the principles of agreement and unity so that God can truly bless us and make us effective in our witness.

As the church in the first century in the city of Rome was challenged, so is the church in the 21st century all over the world challenged because there are so many differences among God's people. So many preferences among God's people that we must learn not to use our preferences and our differences to create division.

But rather we've got to learn how to walk in unity and in agreement. Now, we've covered a lot of ground as we have looked at the practical keys so far that Paul has given us for learning to walk in agreement. First, we talked about accepting others as equals, that you cannot be the people of God until you recognize that all of us who are saved by faith are equally the people of God and we must learn to accept one another despite differences about disputable matters.

Secondly, we talked about allowing for honest differences of opinion. Not everything is a make-it-break-it issue, but we must learn to distinguish between majors and minors and between essential points and nonessential ones. Third, we talked about avoiding arrogance. Learning that we should not, must not look down on people who practice their faith differently when it comes to disputable matters.

And so Paul says learn not to look down on people, to assume that your thinking about certain points is the only Christian way to think. That creates a division that doesn't please God. So in the previous message, we talked about some of those things. We talked about the need for us to be real careful with this "what would Jesus do" paradigm.

Because I've found that there are a lot of Christians who, although if you think of it in the right context, if you live by a "what would Jesus do" mindset, you certainly will be able to make some sound decisions. But here's the qualifier. If the Bible is not clear as to what Jesus would do in a certain position, don't make the mistake of taking your preference and your scruples and saying, "Well, that's the way Jesus would live, so every Christian ought to do it that way."

So we talked about the fact that some Christians are getting into an abuse of that paradigm. Again, there's nothing wrong with the paradigm, it's just when you begin to use too much conjecture and too little biblical evidence, that's where you're beginning to manipulate the faith of others by your own scruples. Because you have people now who are into "what would Jesus drive?"

I'm telling you the truth. "What would Jesus drive?" And they're against SUVs and they're against gas guzzlers and they're against luxury cars. And so they say Jesus wouldn't drive one and you shouldn't be in one either. Well, you don't know what Jesus would drive. He drove a colt.

He rode into town on a donkey, but that doesn't translate into a vehicle that you can identify in today's world. And so I suggest that you just not walk around the church parking lot and say, "He ought to be ashamed of himself. All these SUVs can't even pass a gas station. Could be using that money for the missionaries."

Not your place. You drive if you want to drive some environmentally sound vehicle that you put gas or grass or something in there. I don't know. You do what you want to do. Don't impose your scruple on the whole church of Jesus Christ. "What would Jesus eat?" Some folks are into that and they don't want you eating certain things and they're blaming it on Jesus.

Jesus wouldn't have that in His diet, you shouldn't have it in yours. And we have to be careful. Where would Jesus send His kids to school? We talked about that. Talked about how would Jesus worship? What political party would Jesus join? You're assuming that He would join one of them.

There's too much assumption and the problem is when we, again, have an arrogance to our faith. Now, the Bible here is clear: whatever is your conviction, hold it with all your heart. Be fully convinced in your own mind of the way you ought to practice your faith in disputable matters. We're not talking about essentials. Essentials we must all believe alike. But disputable matters, practice your faith out of a clear conscience but don't impose your view on everyone.

Because the call here, the plea here, is for us to have genuine Christian unity and agreement. And you've got to learn that agreement doesn't mean you agree on every point. It just means you agree sometimes to disagree and to keep an agreeable attitude. And we must learn to grow and mature and keep an agreeable attitude.

In fact, the goal is you want to get good at saying, "I disagree with you, but I love you just the same. I disagree with you on that point, but let's find some other point where we can talk and have fellowship." Why spend our time fighting when there are other issues that we can focus on and get the work of God done?

So I want to pick it up and talk about the fact that Paul says here in Romans 14 that we must learn that other people are accountable to God. His rationale for calling us to avoid arrogance is he's saying other people are accountable to God, they're not accountable to you. We're all going to face the Lord one day and we have to answer to Him for how we practiced our faith.

Now, what I want to address though is, isn't there a level of human accountability that the Bible calls us to? The answer is yes. But accountability to man is very different than judging someone's faith. And I want to make sure you understand the difference. Paul does say here that we are going to answer to God for our faith. And so he says that's our primary focus.

What can we do if I have a position that I feel strongly about on some disputable matter? What can I do without practicing discord or disagreement in the body of Christ? Number one, I can use my influence to help you understand some things that maybe you don't see from your perspective. That's okay. To that end, Christians can have a healthy debate about some of these issues.

And that's altogether appropriate. But there's a difference between having a healthy discussion and debate and deciding that until you see it my way, there's something wrong with you and your faith. Two different things. We have freedom in Christ, including the freedom to disagree on disputable matters.

And I want encourage you as we learn to be a true Christian fellowship and to be therapeutic and to share with one another and be intimate in sharing points of challenge and that sort of thing. Make sure that accountability is truly biblical accountability.

Guest (Male): In case you joined us late, you're listening to Destined for Victory featuring the teaching ministry of Pastor Paul Sheppard. Stay with us, the second half of today's message is coming right up.

One of the things we love to do for friends and listeners like you is to pray for you when you're in need. So if you have a prayer request, please visit PastorPaul.net and use the contact feature to share with us. Our ministry team is always happy to lift you up in prayer.

And of course, when you stop by our website, remember that's where you can listen to the broadcast on demand at your convenience, PastorPaul.net. Now let's get you back to the rest of today's Destined for Victory message, "Can't We All Just Get Along?"

Paul Sheppard: Now, there are two extremes that I've seen people go to that you want to avoid. One is I've seen the kind of so-called accountability where someone is trying to control another person's life. That is what you don't want to get into.

When you walk with a brother or sister in faith and you say, "I want you to hold me accountable, I want you to help me. When you see problem areas in my Christian faith, when you see problem areas in my belief system or in the way I'm living, some of the decisions I'm making. I want you to speak into my life." That's good.

But what you're not asking for them is to control your life. We don't control one another's lives. That's not healthy, that's cultic. That's a cult when other folk are snooping around, finding out what you're doing about everything and they're trying to manipulate and control your life. That's not biblical accountability.

Because the bottom line is you answer to God. My role in your life is to help you learn what God's will is and to challenge you to be all that God's called you to be, but it is not to be a controlling agent in your life. The only person who ought to be in control of your life is not even you.

Get this straight now. No human ought to be in control of your life because you shouldn't even be in control of your life. The Holy Spirit has been sent into the life of every believer as the controlling agent. So when a brother or sister comes along to help you grow in your faith, our job is simply to be used of God to help speak truth to you and to help you see what the word of God clearly calls you to, and we point you to the word.

See, that's healthy. I point you to the word. "Well, have you thought about this? Here's what the word of God says and I'm just interested in making sure you understand what God is calling us to do in His word." That's healthy. But don't look for someone else to control your faith because God hasn't called them to do that.

When people control people, God is not in it. If a church is so controlling that the pastors are dictating how you are to live your life in every single detail and leaders are dictating, that is not God's plan. Our job is to point you to the Savior and to point you to the word because the word is going to judge us all in the end.

And so you've got to get it straight. So that's biblical accountability. And in that context, you do have to speak tough things to people. In fact, let me show you some verses that will help you distinguish what it really ought to look like. Go to Proverbs Chapter 27. Proverbs Chapter 27, and I'm trying to show you how we can influence one another in a godly and correct manner.

Proverbs Chapter 27, look at Verses 5 and 6. Proverbs 27:5 says this: "Better is open rebuke than hidden love." Verse 6 says, "Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses." Now let's get that straight. Better is open rebuke than hidden love.

You want people who, when they see errors in your life or your lifestyle or your belief system, when they see you what they would call off-center, you want people who love you enough to say, "Here's what I see. Have you considered this?" Don't ask people in your life to like everything about you.

Don't be so insecure that the only folk you want in your life are people who think you're wonderful in every detail because they won't help you. None of us will grow if everybody around us makes us feel like we're perfect just as we are. So you do need people who, if they have a point of disagreement with you that they think is pretty important, who will lovingly speak truth into your life.

And even if they have to rebuke you, Bible says here it's better for them to openly rebuke you than to have a hidden love where they say, "I love them so much, I don't want to hurt their feelings." You don't need people in your life who love you so much they won't hurt your feelings. You need your feelings hurt sometimes.

Is anybody feeling me on this? Every now and then we need somebody who will say, "You know what? I love you, but you're tripping. I love you, but you have lost your mind." Oh, that's what you need. That's what you need. You need somebody who will love you enough to call you on the carpet.

Say you've got some old bad nasty attitude. Not you, but somebody on your row has a bad nasty attitude, funky attitude about something and it's just raw. Have you ever been there where maybe something happened on your job or you had some conflict with your family or whatever and someone perhaps wronged you or they did something that really hurt you?

You're entitled to be hurt, you're entitled to be angry, but there's an appropriate hurt and appropriate anger. But every now and then, not you, but people on your row, in response to being hurt or angry, they get a bad attitude and they end up as wrong as the people who wronged them.

Well, when that happens, when you're wrong, somebody who loves you and can see where you are needs to love you enough to pull you in line. And they pull you in line not by manipulating you, not by shaming you, but by in love speaking the truth.

And here it's called open rebuke, that they're willing to look you in your face and say you are wrong, your attitude is wrong. You need an attitude adjustment. You need to go somewhere and pray. In fact, don't go anywhere, let's pray right now. That's what you need. That's what I need.

We need people in our lives who will help you get where you need to go. You're in some emotional ditch, you need somebody to help you get out of it. That's appropriate. And I love the follow-up verse. He says wounds from a friend can be trusted. I've often said you've got to learn to distinguish friend from foe.

A foe will stab you in your back. A friend will cut you in front. And they have two different devices. A foe will stab you with a knife to do you harm. But a friend will cut you too, but that's a surgeon's instrument. Surgeons cut, but they don't cut to do you harm. They cut to do you well.

When they cut, they're trying to help you. You see the difference? When you stab me with a knife, don't tell me you're helping me. But if you have a surgical instrument and you're cutting me, first you use some anesthesia. Come on friends, now we have to learn how to be godly friends.

If you know you're going to have to hurt somebody's feelings, at least set them up. Say, "Now, you know I love you, right? You know you're my boy, right? You know, girl, you know you're my girlfriend, right?" Set them up. Apply a little anesthesia, make them feel good. "You know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you, right?"

And once you have them set up, cut them to heal them. Don't love them so much you won't tell them the truth. Some parents loving your children to death, not to life. You need to love them to life. Don't love them so well that you won't pull them in line, correct them, draw boundaries, say, "This is where you go and no further."

"I don't want them—I read a book that said I'll alienate them." No. You have to love them enough to say, "Look, I'd better not ever hear that come out of your mouth again." Love them enough to say, "Do you know where you live? Do you know what your last name is?"

There are things you don't do, there are things you don't say, there are places you don't go simply by virtue of your address and your last name.

Guest (Male): The truth may hurt, but it also heals. As we read in Proverbs 27:6, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend, profuse are the kisses of an enemy." Thanks so much for stopping by for today's Destined for Victory message, "Can't We All Just Get Along?"

To find out more about Destined for Victory's mission and purpose, or about the special gift reserved for you when you give generously today, please come see us at PastorPaul.net. That's PastorPaul.net.

Paul Sheppard: God uses people to help you. We all have blind spots. Somebody's got to help you see what you don't see. It's like a driver and there are spots on the road the driver can't see by virtue of his or her vantage point, but another passenger can see.

Guest (Male): And that's tomorrow in our continuing message, "Can't We All Just Get Along?" Until then, remember: He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are destined for victory.