Awakened to Grace

Chad Roberts: Welcome to Awakened to Grace. I'm Chad Roberts, and I'm so glad you're joining us today. I believe God has connected us for a great purpose. Today you're going to hear a powerful sermon. But before we get to the sermon, I want to encourage you to check out my new book. It's called "Blind Faith: Seeing God Through Darkness." It's published by our partners at Lifeway.

The reason I wrote this book is because I am 100% blind. As I've walked this path of blindness and this path of suffering, I want to teach you how Christians can suffer well. I say that today my job as a blind pastor is to help people trust a God they cannot see. You can order the book right now anywhere that books are sold in any format. Even if you're not much of a book reader, you can even get it in audio where you can listen to it. I hope you'll go right now to the official website, which is blindfaith.life. Again, that's blindfaith.life. I hope you'll not only get a copy for you, but I hope you'll pick one up for someone who needs encouragement in their faith today.

It’s easy for us to see that man’s sin, isn’t it? It’s easy for us to see that man’s failure. But could it be that some of us have the same attitude? Could it be we have the same actions? Here we have received the richest grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, but yet we’ve not extended the same grace. What does it mean to truly forgive? It takes minimum grace to forgive someone when they say "I’m sorry." But doesn’t it take maximum grace when someone’s not sorry?

Can you forgive someone who’s not sorry? Can you forgive someone who truly doesn’t deserve to be forgiven? Sometimes we focus on the wrong things. The gospel does not ask the question, "Do I deserve forgiveness?" because you know what the Bible’s answer would be? No. Rather than asking, "Do I deserve forgiveness?" the gospel asks, "Is God gracious enough to forgive?" And the answer is yes.

You should ask yourself the same question. Don't ask yourself, "Is that person deserving of forgiveness?" because they may very well not be. The real question is will you offer the grace that God offered you and forgive them? Friends, this is the remedy to bitterness. It’s the remedy to guilt. Today I want to share with you if you’re someone that you’re carrying a heavy load today. If you’re someone that within your heart, you carry the weight of guilt.

If you’re someone that you carry the weight of bitterness. If you’re someone that you carry that heavy weight of revenge. If you’re someone that you carry the heavy weight of anguish. I’m telling you the remedy today is the gospel of Jesus in your heart and it’s forgiveness in action. That is the remedy that God offers today. God will enable you through the precious Holy Spirit to give to them what they don’t deserve, just as you have received what you don’t deserve.

How do you forgive? Let me explore this today because this is where the rubber meets the road. How do you forgive? If you’re going to take notes, let me just give you briefly three quick things of how to forgive. We may even make it to the buffets today before the Baptists make it there. We’ll never make it before the Presbyterians. I’m not even out of my introduction before the Presbyterians are there. The United Methodists are on their way probably right now, but we’ll always make it before the Pentecostals.

It’s fun being non-denominational, isn’t it? And we’re not even in competition with the Seventh-Day Adventists; they were yesterday, so forget that. I don’t know what Lutherans do. If you’re a Lutheran, let me know because I don’t know their schedules. How do you forgive? If you understand the concept that the person who sinned against me does not deserve forgiveness and neither do I deserve God’s forgiveness, then how do you put it into action? How do you do what seems impossible?

With God, nothing is impossible. Number one: forgive freely. Don’t hold on to anything. Don’t hold on to a thing. Don’t hold on to past grudges, past hurts, past conversations, or imaginary conversations. You know what the Lord showed me a few years ago? The Lord showed me when I have imaginary conversations with people in my head. Am I crazy, or do you all do that? Am I the only one, or do you guys have imaginary conversations too? Okay, just making sure I’m not the only one.

It’s interesting because I think sometimes people don’t realize how often pastors get hurt. Let me tell you something. You wouldn’t believe how people hurt pastors. I was telling somebody the other day, I’ve been stabbed in the back so many times sometimes I think if I drink water, I leak. But you know what I remind myself? Hurt people are the ones who hurt people. So I have to let go of it. You wouldn’t believe some things people have said to me. Hurtful things.

Sometimes, like any human, I replay those things in my memory bank. I go back and think, "I wish I’d said this," and I have those imaginary conversations. You know what the Holy Spirit taught me? The Holy Spirit taught me, Chad, every time that you have an imaginary conversation, that detects somebody hurt you and you’re holding on to it. The Lord taught me you’re not freely forgiving them because there’s a part of it that you’re holding on to.

Whenever I begin to have an imaginary conversation in my head, I try to stop it immediately. I try to shut it down and I try to say, "No, Jesus, I forgive them and I let it go in Jesus' name." Number one, forgive people freely. Number two: forgive people fully. You know one of the hardest things that I’ve had to learn even in my own marriage? I’ve had to learn, and I'll be honest, this is very recent that I'm trying to learn this.

One of the frustrations in my marriage is I’ll do something dumb or something and Sadie will get upset with me and I’ll apologize. Anybody ever apologize? Don’t leave me in the dark. Blind man, dark, whatever. But I’ll apologize. And what I’ll do is I’ll say, "I’m sorry. I mean, it’s not like I did it on purpose. Do you think I wanted to hurt you on purpose? You think that’s my goal? I’m not malicious." So I’m sorry. I’ve never understood why when I say "I’m sorry," she doesn’t hear "I’m sorry."

I’m thinking, "What is wrong with her?" But you know what I’ve learned? Men, we’re not the brightest, are we? Wives, if you get so frustrated because you tell your husband something and he can’t remember, we’re the reason they created instant replay. We can’t even remember sports. Anyways, I’ve never understood. I say "I’m sorry," but she doesn’t hear "I’m sorry." So what is she hearing? Well, guess what I learned. Do you know what the Greek word for apology is?

It’s where we get our English word "apologetics." And apologetics means to build an argument, to build a defense. So often when I apologize, you know what I’m doing? I’m building my defense. And you know what? This will help us at work, with our children, with our spouses, with our neighbors, and with our church family. When we’re wrong, we need to say, "I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?" So often our apologies really are just our defense.

Our marriages would be much stronger if we would lay our defenses down, be vulnerable, and say, "I’m sorry, will you forgive me?" There’s a difference between apologizing and confessing. You know what the word confess means? Confess literally means to agree with. When we confess our sins to God, we are agreeing with God, "I have committed offense and I’m wrong." It’s not only good to confess your sins to God; it’s good to confess your sins to one another.

When you have hurt your spouse or your children or someone you work with or a brother or sister in the Lord, you are never wrong and you are never weak when you say, "I’m sorry, will you forgive me?" That’s the strength of the Lord. That’s the difference between an apology that’s apologetics (building up a defense) and repentance (confession, saying that you’re wrong). We need to learn how to forgive fully. When people do commit an offense against us, when they do sin against us, we forgive them freely and we forgive them fully, holding nothing back.

There are people no doubt that you still have an angst against. You still have an ought against them. And you know what? They have no idea they hurt you. They have no idea that they offended you. As a matter of fact, I would guarantee you that there would be some people that I could sit down with you and I could say, "You know this person did this and I have an ought with this person," and you would probably fully agree with me and say, "Pastor Chad, they’re a horrible human being."

And then if you went and confronted them, they would probably say, "I don’t even know what you’re talking about." Isn’t that how we are sometimes as humans? Can you forgive people who willfully sinned against you as well as those who may not even know they sinned against you? Forgive freely, forgive fully. Lastly: forgive forcefully. Now what do I mean by forcefully? Let me tell you a quick story. When I say forcefully, what I mean is don’t wait for the emotions to come.

There’s some of you that Satan is deceiving you right now. Satan makes you think somehow in your head, "I will forgive that person when I can feel forgiveness." No, forgiveness is not a feeling; it’s a choice. Sometimes you have to choose to forgive whether you feel it or not, and I’m telling you, the feelings will come later on. You be led by your faith, not by your feelings. You let your faith control your will and then your emotions will get in line later on.

Far too many of us are led by our emotions, and our emotions will lead us wrong every single time. You’re not led by your emotions; you’re led by your faith. Then as your faith leads you, your will comes in line and then your emotions take a while, but they get in line. Let me tell you a little story before I close. I read a book in January that just changed my life. It’s called "The Hiding Place." It’s the story of Corrie ten Boom.

Corrie ten Boom was a remarkable woman and she lived in Holland with her father Casper, her sister Betsy, her sister Nollie, and her brother Willem. The ten Boom family loved the Lord with all their hearts. When war broke out in Germany and the Nazis occupied Holland, the ten Boom family made a choice that they were going to hide Jews from the Nazis. And they rescued many, but they paid a horrible price.

They were thrown into concentration camps. Casper died within a week. Betsy and Corrie were together through their concentration camp for several years. They were sent to an evil place in Germany called Ravensbrück. 90,000 women died in Ravensbrück. Betsy died there. Betsy said something that I’ll never forget. She said what she learned at Ravensbrück was no matter how deep the pit, Christ is there deeper still. Corrie survived only because of a clerical error. Weeks later every woman in the concentration camp was gassed.

The Lord allowed Corrie to survive. A couple of years later, the Lord sent her back to Germany to preach the gospel. Can you imagine going back to Nazi Germany? And she’s in a German church sharing the love of Jesus and sharing her experience when a man walks up to her at the end of the service and extends his hand. Do you know who that man was? It was the Nazi soldier who made her strip down and take showers in front of him and humiliated her and grieved her.

After the war, that man came to know the Lord Jesus and he approached Corrie and he extended his hand. Do you know what Corrie did? She did what every one of us would have done; she recoiled back. In that moment she had to decide what she was going to do. Was she going to forgive? And you know what Corrie chose to do? She didn’t feel the emotion. By faith, she forced her hand out and she shook his hand. Friends, some of you have let Satan deceive you.

You think you have to feel a certain way. No, you have to by faith choose to forgive. I think sometimes for whatever reason, we think that if we forgive someone who’s truly hurt us, that just means we have to pretend like nothing ever happened. No, that’s not what it means. What it means is that God gives you the ability to move forward, to go on, to let go of the hurt and the bitterness and not let it poison your soul. God gives you the ability to pray for their salvation.

I think sometimes you take someone who was abused by a father. I think sometimes we think, "Well, to forgive him, that means I have to start going to his house all the time or I have to bring my children around him." No, I think what it means is that you walk in the supernatural grace of Jesus and you have the ability to pray for that father. You have the ability to let go of the bitterness and it not poison your soul. Remember what we said: God knows our greatest physical need, but God knows your greatest soul need, and that’s forgiveness.

Some of you have not laid hold of it. You’ve not received it fully because somewhere in your heart, you think you have to feel. You’re waiting to feel a certain way, and I’m telling you, that’s being led by feelings. Reverse that today. Lead with faith and say in Jesus’ name, "I let it go today." Do they deserve it? Wrong question. Did I deserve God’s grace? Now that’s the right question. Extend to others what God has extended to you.

Last thing I’ll say: the Bible says that God remembers our sin no more. Aren't you thankful for that? Now how can that be? God’s omniscient; He knows everything at all times. So how can an all-knowing and all-omniscient God forget sin? That doesn’t make sense, does it? But do you know what that really means when it says He remembers our sin no more? It means He doesn’t bring it up anymore.

For some of you, I want you to understand, I want you to hear what the Spirit of God is saying today. Some of you think you can’t forgive because you don’t feel a certain way. No, let me tell you, here’s what it means. Remember the sin no more. Not that you try to forget what happened. No, it means you don’t bring it up anymore. You don’t bring it up anymore. You don’t replay those memories. You don’t replay that hurt. You don’t replay the cycle of that. No, you break it in Jesus’ name. How? Forgive. And I’ll tell you on the authority of God’s word, feelings have nothing to do with it. The decision is to forgive.