Unlimited Grace

Bryan Chapell: It's just my family. It's just my job. It's just my disease. It's just our kids who are messing up. I can't go bother Jesus with this. What Mary is teaching us is it's okay. What the Apostle Paul would later say: in everything, not just the big things, in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God.

Guest (Male): So glad you joined us for today's Unlimited Grace, the audio broadcast ministry of pastor and author Bryan Chapell. In today's episode, Pastor Bryan shares a lesson from John chapter 2. Dr. Chapell explores the first recorded miracle of Jesus and what this event highlights about Christ's character and care.

You can find this lesson and many others when you visit unlimitedgrace.com. While you're there, look for Pastor Bryan's book, The Multigenerational Church Crisis. This compelling book asks the question of the church: what could be accomplished in the name of Christ if we could better understand each other? Let's hear now from Dr. Bryan Chapell as he shares the lesson: The Life of the Party.

Bryan Chapell: It is an unlikely beginning. It's the Son of God, the creator of the universe, and his first miracle to manifest his glory is helping his mom keep a wedding from being embarrassing. It's not exactly what you expect. You're waiting for the lightning from heaven or the earthquake on cue, anything that says, "I am the great and powerful," that sort of thing.

You at least want to say, "Can't you turn a couple of fish into a meal for 5,000?" Something like that? All in good time. But right now, something else needs to be done. Last week we were introduced to who this Jesus is by John the Baptist. If you just think of our normal business interchanges, when you're introduced to someone, there's kind of a next step. The next step is you exchange business cards.

The business card is going to say who you are, your person, your product, and your purpose, but it's just writ small, an indication of something much larger about who you are and what you do. What this first miracle is about, this sign, is actually a statement of who Jesus is and what he will do, writ small. It's really the business card, indicating in much larger terms what is going to happen later on.

If you think about what this business card is indicating, showing Jesus' business, it's first saying to us that this Jesus is in the grace business. After all, what he is showing us here is that Jesus provides for people what they cannot provide for themselves, which is the very definition of grace. He's providing what people cannot provide for themselves. You know all about the account. Remember the situation?

It's a big fat Jewish wedding. It's not what you and I think about, the wedding that lasts 20 minutes and the reception lasts a few hours. This is a big fat Jewish wedding, which means it's supposed to go on from three to six days. They've run out of wine, which in a culture of hospitality means there is huge embarrassment occurring now. A family is going to feel like they have failed. This is going to be remembered for the rest of their lives, that they did not provide what was necessary for their guests.

As you think of the situation, you of course know that we don't know the reason this situation has occurred. Why is there not enough wine? Did somebody miscalculate? Did uninvited guests come? Did the delivery truck take the wrong route? We don't know the reasons for the problem. All we know is the consequence. Somebody is guilty of miscalculation, and a family is going to know shame forever because of what has occurred.

If you're facing guilt and shame, what do you do? Ask Jesus. That's what they do. Mary goes right to Jesus and she says, "They're out of wine." The reason she would ask Jesus is not wrong. After all, she knows who he is. She heard the angels and the shepherds, right? "Peace on earth, goodwill to men." Mary and those responsible are thinking we need a little of that goodwill in the form of some good wine right now. And so she asks.

As one whose business is grace, Jesus provides what people cannot provide for themselves. You already know the account. What I have to address is what troubles us about the account. There are various concerns with how Jesus handles the miracle. Verse 3: When the wine ran out, the mother of Jesus said to him, "They have no wine." And Jesus said to her, "Woman, what does this have to do with me?"

Whether you've ever heard a sermon on this or just go to a commentary afterwards and look, you will recognize that people are troubled by Jesus' insensitivity to his mother at this point. He doesn't say Mom or whatever the Aramaic equivalent of Abba for Father is. He doesn't address her tenderly. He just says, "Woman, what does this have to do with me?" You must know that this is not meant to be an insult. This is not insensitive language on its face. It's formal, but not insensitive.

The reason that we know that Jesus is not being insensitive is first because of Mary's reaction. She is, after all, a Jewish mother. When he addresses her as woman, she does not say, "How dare you talk to your mother that way?" In fact, Jesus will address her that way another time in the Gospel of John in great tenderness. Do you remember that account? Jesus will be on the cross.

Recognizing that he will not be with his mother to take care of her in her earthly state, he looks at her and the same one who wrote this gospel, John, and says, "Woman, behold your son," and to John, "Behold your mother." There's the tenderness. Why does he address her so formally at this point and even at that point? You get some sense of it in the words that follow: "Woman, what has this to do with me?"

As we hear those, it sounds like Jesus is distancing himself from her need. There is a sense in which he is distancing himself from her. If I were to simply tell you the words in Greek that are here, it's an idiom in cryptic and short phrases. The actual literal translation would be, "What to me and to you?" "What is this to me and to you?" as though he's saying we live in separate realms. This is not something that you and I share at this point.

That in itself is troubling to us, if you ever see where that phrase is used again in the Gospels. It is a phrase that is used four or five times in its cryptic nature in the Gospel, but always it is put in the mouths of demons. Demons, when they are addressing Jesus, are saying to Jesus, "What have we to do with you?" saying, "We are in different realms. We are in different spiritual orders. We are not in the same place."

When Jesus addresses his mother and says, "What has this to do with me?" he's not showing lack of concern for his mother, he is showing greater concern for his father. "I am not to be controlled by earthly priorities. I am about my father's business." You see that even in the same passage in John chapter 2. If you'll go to verse 16, the history has moved forward and Jesus is no longer in Cana of Galilee, he is in Jerusalem.

He finds that there are those who are in the temple of God who are using their position for profit that is not right. They are selling sacrifices and exchanging money in a way that is inappropriate for actually serving the people of God. Jesus driving the money changers out of the temple ends with this statement, verse 16: "Take these things away. Do not make my father's house a house of trade." He addresses his mother as woman, but his heavenly father he addresses as father.

It's not the first time he's done that, either. He in this place is saying, "You cannot make my father's house a house of trade." You may remember there was another time when he was much younger that Jesus was in his father's house and reminded his mother that he had to be about his father's business. Do you remember that? The family has gone to Jerusalem. The holy family goes away and Jesus is back in Jerusalem. They get somewhere down the road in the caravan and they discover he's not with them.

They come back and they find Jesus in the temple talking with the scribes about religious things. As the parents begin to question him, he says, "Why are you surprised? Did you not know that I had to be about my father's business?" Actually the words again in Aramaic: "That I had to be in my father's house. I had to be in his realm doing his things." Jesus is saying, "It's now the heavenly priorities that must motivate me, not simply earthly ones."

The heavenly priority is plain in the last phrase of verse 4. Jesus says, "What does this have to do with me? My hour is not yet come." If you were to look through the various accounts of John, you would recognize that that phrase is used repeatedly to indicate one thing. I'm going to cite the passages just because you may want to look at them later yourself. If you were to look up John 7:30 or 8:20 or 12:23 and 27 or 13:1. Every time Jesus refers to "my time" or "my hour," he is referring to his crucifixion, to his death.

He says to Mary, "My priorities are now the heavenly priorities. I cannot do earthly things in such a way that it would prematurely cause my death. If I were to create the earthquake, if I were to bring the lightning down, if I were to do that thing that was too obvious at this point, I would challenge the governing spiritual authorities and they would seek me before I had fulfilled all righteousness, doing all that I must do to be this perfect man, living an obedient life before God, and therefore the perfect lamb of God at the right hour. Mary, I can't do this yet."

Now, you know what Mary does. It's verse 5, right? She speaks to the servants and she says to them, "Do whatever he tells you." This really troubles us because we put this conversation in the context of our own family spats. We hear Mary saying to Jesus, "Set the table. Help me out." Jesus says, "It's not my time." Then Mary says, "Ignore what he says, do what he tells you." And then Jesus says, "Oh, all right, I'll do it. It's the holy family."

He's the Son of God. This is not what's happening. He has just said, "Mary, it's not my hour." And Mary gets it. She doesn't argue with him. She doesn't dispute with him. She simply yields it all to him. "Servants, whatever he says, do it." What she is willing to do is ask anything and yield everything. I ask you what I need, but I yield to you, Lord, what you know is best. Even the mother of Jesus would do that.

The reason I say that to you is because what we do when we approach and meet the King of the Universe, the creator of our world and the savior of our souls, is we say we'd better not bother him with the little stuff. It's just my family. It's just my job. It's just my disease. It's just our kids who are messing up. I can't go bother Jesus with this. What Mary is teaching us is it's okay. What the Apostle Paul would later say: "In everything, not just the big things, in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God."

As you would ask anything but yield everything, he will do what he knows is best. It's precisely what Jesus does. In right timing and proportion, he does precisely what is needed.

Guest (Male): You're listening to Unlimited Grace, the audio broadcast ministry of pastor and author Bryan Chapell.

It may seem hard for younger Christians to believe, but people over 50 were raised during an era when 90% of Americans identified as Christian. These older believers were once part of a majority group that understood the mission of the church was to take control of our culture, to halt its evils. At the same time, Christians under 50 have lived their entire lives perceiving themselves as a minority that needs to make credible their faith to a secular, pluralistic culture.

These distinct experiences and perceptions have a profound impact on the priorities different generations have for church ministry. It's no wonder that younger and older believers don't always see eye to eye. In his new book, The Multigenerational Church Crisis, Dr. Bryan Chapell asks the question: what could be accomplished in the name of Christ if we could better understand each other?

This practical and hopeful book is backed by thorough research, revealing how to open the lines of communication, appreciate the experiences that shaped each generation in your church, and unite in one mission to impact your community and the world. You can request your copy of The Multigenerational Church Crisis when you donate online at unlimitedgrace.com or by calling 844-41-GRACE. That's 844-414-7223. And now, more from Bryan Chapell on today's Unlimited Grace.

Bryan Chapell: You recognize this miracle, though it's recorded in scripture, is at the time virtually a secret miracle. If you look at verse 9, you'll recognize that. When the master of the feast tasted the water now become wine and did not know where it came from, though the servants who had drawn the water knew, recognize what's being said. Only those who were most immediate to the task knew what was going on. Others don't know.

This is not something ready to be broadcast yet. So the only ones who know about it are the servants. Look at verse 11: who else knows about it? The disciples. So that they are ready to follow him. But not the authorities, not even apparently the other guests. It is done in measure and proportion and time just exactly what is right according to the wisdom of God. What Mary does is she asks anything but yields everything to Jesus, saying, "If I'm going to put it into his hand, then I have to trust his hand to do what is right." That's a hard thing to do, isn't it?

To say, "Lord, I'm going to ask this thing, big or small, whatever it is. But then I'm going to trust you to respond in proportion as the wise ruler, King of the Universe, do as you know is best." Last weekend, my family got a wonderful opportunity to experience this in a way that we were not expecting at all. Some of you know, though my kids don't like being announced, that my married kids were here in the service last week. We had a meal afterwards with some friends from a church that was part of our experience three decades ago.

We were talking, adults with my children around, about our experiences. The wife in the relationship from three decades ago was talking about her experience. What has it been like to be the mother of a child with mental illness? She has been working with me from time to time on a book that she is writing on what it means to be a Christian mother dealing with a child of mental illness. All the depression and the drugs and the alcohol that goes with some sort of self-medication that might go into such an experience, and how hurt and hard life has been.

At the same time, what joy they have found through it by dependence upon God. She was talking about part of trying to record that and said a few weeks ago she was with a little time in a morning typing away furiously, expressing what she wanted to express: all they had been through, their pain, their difficulty. Typing furiously for hours getting it out, she had so much down on paper, and then somehow there was this computer crash and it all disappeared. By the way, not just that file, but previous days' files of work as well.

She called her husband in absolute devastation and tears at work, saying, "What can I do? I've lost so much. I worked so hard. I was pouring out my heart. What do I do?" They called some friends who were computer experts. They could not retrieve the files. They could not get it back. The husband said, having heard the terrible pain and the tears on the phone, he got home from work that night and his wife greeted him saying, "Hello honey," bright and sunny. He said, "What happened between boo-hoo-hoo and hello honey?"

I wrote it down, what she said. She said, "The way that we have made it through and helped others is by yielding everything to the Lord and being satisfied in him. We know that God could heal our son and we have prayed for that. But he has taught us to rest in him. We have found deep happiness and contentment not in endlessly wrestling to change our circumstances, but in trusting the one who loves us enough to send his son to die for us."

She said, "That morning when I was writing so furiously for others, I actually was not writing about Jesus." She said, "It was all about me, my pain, my anger, my struggle." And then for those of you who were there with us, she said, "There was this little voice of conscience on my shoulder saying, 'This is not what you're supposed to be writing.'" She said, "I kept brushing him away." And then she said finally God just said, "Enough of this," and God hit the delete button. Between the boo-hoo-hoo and the hello honey, I found rest in Jesus again.

I knew that he was sufficient, the one who held me and would hold me forever. He was sufficient. And I yielded to him again. As Cathy and I sat with our guests, including our children and their spouses around the table, we could hardly look at each other for blinking back the tears. Because what we recognized is we could not have asked for better for our own children, some of whom have struggled seriously with health issues and with infertility issues and have prayed and prayed and need to rest in Jesus.

Here was one saying something so rich and deep of her own experience of the God that she would now trust, not wrestling to make it happen her way, but willing to ask anything and at the same time yield everything to his wisdom and his power and his timing. Why would you do that? Why would you yield everything to Jesus? Because he's not just in the grace business. He's also in the joy business.

Guest (Male): That's Pastor Bryan Chapell, and you've been listening to Unlimited Grace. If you would like to hear more from Dr. Chapell, you can find a collection of valuable resources at unlimitedgrace.com. When you visit, you will find today's message and many others from Pastor Bryan.

Once again, go to unlimitedgrace.com or you can give by calling 844-41-GRACE. That's 844-414-7223. Please be sure to join us next time as once again we endeavor to put Christ at the center of our efforts so that lives might be transformed by his unlimited grace. This ministry is brought to you by Unlimited Grace Media and continues to be made possible with your generous financial support.