Adventures in Odyssey

Chris: Hi, this is Chris. Welcome to Adventures in Odyssey.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Oh, hi there. Welcome to Odyssey. I'm John Avery Whittaker, but most folks around here call me Whit. Why don't you get the whole family together and join us for another exciting adventure in Odyssey.

Sarah Pratchett: Girls are smarter than boys.

Jared: I knew it.

Dwayne: I am not putting on a dress.

Jared: They're plotting some sinister scheme.

Sarah Pratchett: It's a secret.

Jared: The kookaburra is in the banana tree.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): I sure hope not.

Dwayne: Suddenly, the giant strawberry yogurt monster turns toward the city.

Guest (Male): Now that I've eaten the entire airport, I'm going to eat the city of St. Louis.

Jared: Oh, yeah?

Guest (Male): Who are you?

Jared: I'm Captain Electric, here to save the day.

Guest (Male): Oh, yeah? Just try and get me you overgrown lump of sour milk.

Dwayne: The giant yogurt lunges toward our superhero, but Captain Electric bounces on a nearby clothesline and catapults into the sky. Unfortunately, the yogurt monster is quickly on his way. Like an athletic amoeba, the yogurt reaches up to pluck Captain Electric out of the sky. But just as he does, he trips over the St. Louis Arch and plunges into the Mississippi River. Later at the White House Oval Office, Captain Electric, you've diverted the asteroid from smashing into our planet. You've repaired the Hoover Dam with peanut butter and a spatula, and you saved the city of St. Louis from the perils of strawberry yogurt.

Jared: All in a day's work, Mr. President.

Dwayne: How can we ever say thank you?

Jared: Actually, what I'd really like is a nice big bowl of Toasti-O's.

Dwayne: Wait a second. You did all that for a bowl of cereal?

Jared: Yep. It was all part of a scheme back in those days.

Dwayne: What scheme?

Jared: To get kids to buy cereal. These big companies sponsored comic books like this and kids' radio shows and use them to sell their cereal. Back then, kids were susceptible to stuff like that.

Dwayne: You mean susceptible?

Jared: That's what I said.

Dwayne: Whoa.

Jared: Wow. Be the first on your block to get genuine Captain Electric spy equipment. Look, Dwayne, secret spy goggles.

Dwayne: A decoder ring.

Jared: And a high-powered spy periscope.

Dwayne: Cool.

Jared: For each toy, just send in six box tops from Toasti-O's, the healthy, wholesome cereal for growing boys and girls. Let's get some.

Dwayne: They don't still make Toasti-O's, do they?

Jared: I don't know. I never had them. Hey. There they go again.

Dwayne: What?

Jared: Out the window. You see that playhouse over there?

Dwayne: Where?

Jared: In Sarah's backyard, see?

Dwayne: Uh-huh.

Jared: I just saw two more girls sneak in there. They've been going in and out all week long. They look all around, make sure nobody's watching, and duck inside.

Dwayne: Jared, I think you're paranoid.

Jared: Who, me?

Dwayne: Yes, you. Ever since camp.

Jared: That has nothing to do with anything.

Dwayne: Really? So the fact that the girls dumped that bucket of flour in your head hasn't made you just a little bit paranoid about them?

Jared: No. And if they weren't girls, they never would have gotten away with it.

Dwayne: But didn't you get away with squirting toothpaste under their pillows the day before?

Jared: Back to the topic at hand, Toasti-O's.

Dwayne: Right. You think they still make them?

Jared: I don't know, but I know somebody who would.

Dwayne: Where are you going?

Jared: Where else? What's in? Uh-oh.

Dwayne: What?

Jared: Sarah Pratchett, 12:00.

Dwayne: Well, good. It gives us half an hour.

Jared: I mean, she's directly ahead of us. Hey. Let's do a little subtle interrogation. Sarah.

Sarah Pratchett: Oh, hi Jared, Dwayne.

Jared: So Sarah, what devious things are you girls doing in that hideout of yours?

Dwayne: Real subtle there, Jared.

Sarah Pratchett: Oh, you must mean our super secret sisters club.

Jared: Super secret sisters? What's that?

Sarah Pratchett: Come here.

Jared: Yeah?

Sarah Pratchett: I can't tell you. It's a secret.

Jared: Oh, give me a break.

Sarah Pratchett: I will tell you this. We're planning on something big. I mean really big. The entire town of Odyssey is going to take notice.

Jared: I knew it.

Sarah Pratchett: So maybe one day you too could do something this important.

Jared: This doesn't have anything to do with flour, does it?

Sarah Pratchett: Ta-ta.

Jared: I hate when she says that.

Sarah Pratchett: Ta-ta.

Jared: Now don't you start. Mr. Whittaker.

Dwayne: Mr. Whittaker.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Oh, hi there Jared, Dwayne. Hey, what's up?

Jared: This.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Oh. An old Captain Electric comic book.

Jared: Do you remember them?

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Oh, remember them? Are you kidding? Captain Electric was my favorite when I wasn't much older than you. And I used to listen to his radio show every Friday night at 7:30. Never missed an episode. Uh, where did you get this?

Jared: I found it in my attic.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Oh, how about that?

Dwayne: Do they still make Toasti-O's?

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): I sure hope not. Toasti-O's, they were twisted lumps of dried oatmeal that turned to mush as soon as you poured on the milk. We used to use them to caulk our bathtubs. Why?

Jared: We were hoping they were still around.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Well, why don't you like the cereal they make now?

Jared: Sure, but I want to order some Captain Electric spy goggles and stuff.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Huh.

Jared: There, see?

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Oh, yeah. I remember those. Huh. Come to think of it.

Jared: What?

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Come with me. Ah, there it is. Okay, here we go.

Jared: Looks like an old briefcase.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Uh-huh.

Dwayne: What's inside, Mr. Whittaker?

Jared: Toasti-O's?

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Not quite. Ah, this little latch here always got stuck. There.

Jared: Whoa. Whoa.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): There it is. A complete set of genuine Captain Electric spy equipment.

Guest (Male): The adventure continues with The Last Chance Detectives. The book series that you've known and loved, The Last Chance Detectives, is back with new adventures to tap into the imagination of your kids. Mike, Winnie, Ben, and Spencer are always up for a good adventure, not only working to solve mysteries, but teaching great values like teamwork and how a little faith goes a long way. The Last Chance Detectives, it's available now at last chance detectives.com.

Jared: I can't believe Mr. Whittaker let us play with this stuff.

Dwayne: Yeah, my dad would have put it in a glass case with a lock and key.

Jared: Really? Halt. All eyes 3:00.

Dwayne: Huh?

Jared: Sarah's playhouse. Look, they must be having another super secret sisters meeting.

Dwayne: Yeah, I guess so.

Jared: Dwayne, I 've got a feeling deep down in the pit of my stomach. Call it a gut instinct.

Dwayne: Could have been those tacos we had for lunch.

Jared: They're up to no good. They're plotting some sinister scheme.

Dwayne: How can you tell?

Jared: Two reasons. For one thing, I can just feel it in my bones. A good spy has a keen sense of intuition.

Dwayne: Oh. And the second?

Jared: They're girls. Quick, let's set up a command post in my bedroom. Affirmative. Quick, the secret spy goggles. Check. Wow, these goggles were great.

Dwayne: Hmm.

Jared: What?

Dwayne: I can't see their window from this angle. We're up too high.

Jared: Maybe we should get closer.

Dwayne: Bing. You just gave me a great idea.

Jared: I did?

Dwayne: You may make a good spy one day yourself, Private Oswald.

Jared: Private Oswald?

Dwayne: Okay, here's the plan. One of us dresses up like a bush and sneaks over there.

Jared: Huh? That's crazy.

Dwayne: No, it isn't. All we have to do is cover you up with twigs and branches and stuff.

Jared: Me? Why me?

Dwayne: Because I'm the five-star general. Five-star generals cannot dress up as a bush. It could damage morale. Besides, Dwayne, between the two of us, you look more like a bush.

Jared: Oh. Thanks.

Dwayne: Okay, take the spy goggles, spy periscope, and the walkie-talkie and report back to me here at command post headquarters at 1400 hours.

Jared: A bush.

Dwayne: Don't think of yourself as a bush. Think of yourself as a fully camouflage budding secret agent.

Jared: A bush. I was a treat once in my first grade play.

Dwayne: Yeah, that's great.

Jared: So uh, what's my motivation here?

Dwayne: You're what?

Jared: And uh, what kind of personality does this bush have?

Dwayne: You're a spy bush, Private. Plain and simple. You're the James Bond of bushes. Got it?

Jared: The name is Bush. Dwayne Bush.

Dwayne: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're natural. Now move it, Private. Move it, move it, move it. This is Mother Bird to Platypus Ranger. Come in, Platypus Ranger. Over.

Jared: I made it. I made it.

Dwayne: Nice work, Bush. Can you establish a visual contact on the suspects?

Jared: Uh, no, but I can't see the girls.

Dwayne: Do you see any sacks of flour in there?

Jared: Wait. Oh no.

Dwayne: What?

Jared: There's a great big dog coming at me. You didn't tell me they had a dog. Uh-oh. Shoo, doggy. Shoo. Come on. Hey, get out of here, will you? You're blocking my way. Bad Bush Ranger, Platypus Ranger. Hey, hey, stop that. Quick, come on. Disgusting. Watch out. Don't touch me. Oh, man. Stop. Abandon post. Abandon post. He's going to blow your cover. Hurry, the girls will come out any minute now. Retreat. Retreat. The doggy's chasing me. Help. Wait, wait. Watch where you're going. Look out fast.

Mandy: Whoa.

Jared: Puddle. Oh, yuck. Uh. Dwayne, wait a minute. Don't go. It was a good effort. Come back up to the command post and

Dwayne: No way. Look at me. I 'm covered with mud. My mom's going to kill me.

Jared: Just be glad you weren't dressed as a fire hydrant.

Dwayne: Funny.

Jared: You can't leave now. We have to go to Plan B.

Dwayne: No way. I'm bushed.

Jared: That's funny. Now wait, Dwayne.

Dwayne: I'm going home.

Jared: But but but Fine. My first day as a five-star general and I'm already deserted by my troop.

Sarah Pratchett: Well, hi Jared.

Jared: Oh, hi.

Sarah Pratchett: You wouldn't happen to be snooping on us, would you?

Jared: Snooping? I would never stoop to snoop. Surveillance and reconnaissance maybe, but never snooping.

Sarah Pratchett: Uh-huh. Just remember how my dad feels about kids going into our backyard without permission. He was a college linebacker, remember?

Jared: Yeah, I remember. So I guess your big plan is coming together, huh?

Sarah Pratchett: Uh-huh.

Jared: I don't really care what it is, you know.

Sarah Pratchett: That's good because I'm not going to tell you. Even if I wanted to, I couldn't.

Jared: Why not? I mean, not like I care.

Sarah Pratchett: The main reason is simple. You're a boy.

Jared: What?

Sarah Pratchett: I know. You can't help it. You were born that way.

Jared: But

Sarah Pratchett: And being a boy, you just aren't smart enough to be told our secret.

Jared: What?

Sarah Pratchett: Sorry, but it's a scientific fact. Check the stats. Girls are smarter than boys. So as a boy, you just don't meet our qualifications for high-level secrecy. Got to go now.

Jared: I want to see those stats.

Sarah Pratchett: Ta-ta.

Jared: Wait a second. Yeah, that's it.

Dwayne: If each pepperoni has a radius of 1.5 inches, what is the circumference of George's pepperoni pizza? Um, next question. If you place 547 jelly beans in a car going 56 miles an hour, what would I'll get it. Hello?

Sarah Pratchett: Agent 503X, is this line secure?

Dwayne: Huh?

Sarah Pratchett: Is your phone line tapped?

Dwayne: I don't think so.

Sarah Pratchett: Good. This is to let you know that the kookaburra is in the banana tree.

Dwayne: Jared, are you all right?

Sarah Pratchett: I'm not Jared. I'm Agent 3XQ.

Dwayne: Well, listen Q. I'm really sorry about your kookaburra club.

Sarah Pratchett: Dwayne, I mean 503X. Don't you remember the secret code?

Dwayne: Oh, yeah. Sarah's in the playhouse.

Sarah Pratchett: Never mind. I need your help. Really. Please.

Dwayne: What kind of help? You want me to do what? I am not putting on a dress.

Jared: No, no. Girls don't wear dresses anymore. The pants are fine. It's like this. You're the new girl in town.

Dwayne: I am not.

Jared: All the best agents have to go undercover. Deep cover.

Dwayne: James Bond never dressed up as a girl.

Jared: Not yet, but he will. You just watch. Look, all I want you to do is put on this wig and these sunglasses. It's a perfect disguise.

Dwayne: This is too weird.

Jared: Oh, and here's an old purse I found of my mom's in the attic.

Dwayne: A purse? You want me to carry a purse?

Jared: Dwayne, this is an extremely dangerous mission. You're going in behind enemy lines. Not just anyone would have the guts to do this. You may not realize this now, but you, Dwayne Oswald, are our only hope of infiltrating the super secret sisters club. This may be your finest hour.

Dwayne: And I don't have to wear a dress.

Jared: No dress.

Dwayne: Well, maybe this one.

Jared: Great, you'll be perfect.

Dwayne: I just feel a little silly.

Jared: Hurry, they just got started. And get your voice up higher. You know, like a girl.

Dwayne: Is this all right?

Jared: Perfect.

Sarah Pratchett: All right, the Super Secret Sisters Club will now take a vote. Okay, looks like we have three votes for and two against. That means could that be? Mandy, will you please get that?

Mandy: Sure. Yeah?

Dwayne: Hello. I'm Glenda Clue Scootl, the new girl in town. Could I join your club, please?

Mandy: You have to be kidding. Let her in, Mandy. It's all right. We need all the help we can get right now.

Dwayne: And if you say so

Mandy: Thank you very much.

Sarah Pratchett: What's your name again?

Dwayne: Glenda.

Sarah Pratchett: Glenda.

Mandy: She lost her wig.

Sarah Pratchett: Look, girls. Glenda looks a lot like someone else we know. Why she looks like Dwayne playing dress up.

Dwayne: Excuse me, but I think my mother is calling me.

Sarah Pratchett: I I think it is Dwayne.

Mandy: Hey Dwayne, you want our vomit earrings too?

Sarah Pratchett: I have some eyeliner for you and pumps. You know, that purse just doesn't match your outfit. Good grief, is your color.

Dwayne: I'm going to need years of therapy after this.

Jared: Hey, take it easy, Dwayne.

Dwayne: I've never been more humiliated in my life.

Jared: This is nothing. Just wait until you get into high school.

Dwayne: Jared, I think I'm going to retire from the spy business.

Jared: You what? Dwayne, you're my best agent.

Dwayne: I'm getting too old for this kind of work.

Jared: Dwayne, you're 11. Get a hold of yourself. Meanwhile, I have another plan.

Dwayne: Help me out.

Jared: You don't have to do anything this time.

Dwayne: Really? Then I'm all for it.

Jared: I only need to borrow your remote control car.

Dwayne: The the one I got for Christmas?

Jared: That's the one. But why? Just let me borrow it and you'll find out tomorrow.

Guest (Male): A mysterious phone call and a new nemesis. Emily Jones and Matthew Parker are on the case in the new book Jones and Parker Case Files The Nemesis. 16 new stories full of fun, faith, and intrigue. Kids ages 8 to 12 will sharpen their detective skills and learn important lessons as they read along, inspect clues, examine the evidence, and try to guess who done it.

Sarah Pratchett: We're going to have a blast.

Guest (Male): For more, go to adventuresinodyssey.com/jonesandparker.

Guest (Female): Want to contact us about the episodes you're hearing? Visit our website at adventuresinodyssey.com or talk to someone at Focus on the Family. Call 1 800 A Family. With the parents' permission, of course. We always love hearing from you.

Dwayne: Jared, are you in there?

Jared: Dwayne, just in time.

Dwayne: Your mom said to come on up.

Jared: In time for what? Come here. You're not going to believe what I just did.

Dwayne: I probably will. Is my car all right?

Jared: Better than all right. It's in.

Dwayne: In? In what?

Jared: I taped the walkie-talkie to your remote control car and drove the car right into the hideout and under a table when they weren't there.

Dwayne: What?

Jared: We're in.

Dwayne: This is amazing.

Jared: Listen, they're about to start.

Sarah Pratchett: President Sarah is now calling the meeting of the Super Secret Sisters Club to order. Thank you. Now that our latecomers are here, namely Heather and Julie, we'll have to catch them up to date on our project. Secretary Mandy.

Mandy: Thank you, President Sarah. As you know, this could be the biggest Total secrecy.

Dwayne: What?

Jared: Oh no, the batteries. They're going dead. Okay, you stay here. I'll go get some new batteries downstairs. Hurry, hurry. There.

Dwayne: Turn it up. Turn it up.

Sarah Pratchett: I agree. I think we could get a lot more attention if we can get them there. So who would like to shoot the mayor?

Mandy: Oh, I want to do it. Please me.

Sarah Pratchett: Okay, Heather.

Jared: Huh?

Dwayne: Huh?

Jared: Did she say shoot the mayor?

Sarah Pratchett: Don't forget, we've got to shoot the sheriff, too.

Mandy: What about the deputy?

Sarah Pratchett: I don't think we should shoot the deputy.

Mandy: Well,

Jared: This is worse than I thought. Way worse. We have to do something. Tell someone. Like who? Who will believe us? Mr. Whittaker. Let's go.

Sarah Pratchett: But Mr. Whittaker, you don't know these girls like I do.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Now, Jared.

Sarah Pratchett: When you least expect it, they'll surround you like a pack of wild animals and dump flour on you.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Jared, I I gave you boys that equipment so you could play and use your imaginations. I didn't think you were going to use it to actually spy on someone.

Jared: I know. I'm sorry, but Mr. Whittaker, they're going to shoot the mayor.

Dwayne: And the sheriff.

Jared: And maybe even the deputy.

Dwayne: You have to do something to stop them.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Now listen to yourselves. Do you expect me to believe that this secret group of girls is really a a front for assassins and terrorists? Now I think you've gone just a little too far with your game.

Jared: This isn't a game, Mr. Whittaker. We're talking high-level conspiracy here.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): All right, all right. Here's what I'll do. Now why I'm going to do it is beyond me. I'll go to Sarah's meeting and find out what's going on. Will that ease your minds?

Dwayne: A little.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): All right. You two stay right here.

Jared: There goes one brave man.

Sarah Pratchett: And so that about wraps things up. Are there any Who could that be? It's Mr. Whittaker. Mr. Whittaker?

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Um, I I'm sorry to disturb your meeting, girls, but uh, this seems to be a little uh, well, a misunderstanding.

Sarah Pratchett: What's wrong?

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Well, Jared and Dwayne are under the impression that you're going to shoot the mayor and quite possibly the sheriff and his deputy.

Sarah Pratchett: What? Shoot the

Mandy: Oh, brother. Boys.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Well, I'm glad it's something funny.

Sarah Pratchett: But how could they know that we Wait a minute. Ah, look, a remote control car and a walkie-talkie.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Huh. All our secret agents at work. Uh, so so what's the joke?

Sarah Pratchett: Well, Mr. Whittaker, it's true. We weren't going to shoot them.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Really?

Sarah Pratchett: Well, the mayor and the sheriff, but not the deputy.

Mandy: Right. We're their cameras. We're going to do an Odyssey celebrities calendar to raise money for the Connelsville Orphans Home.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Oh, I see. Well, carry on with your meeting, girls. I think I'll have a little chat with our super sleuths and their parents.

Sarah Pratchett: My feet are sore.

Dwayne: Oh, yeah? Why, I think I've got blisters.

Jared: Oh, we have an attitude here. Just watch how you talk to your superior officer, Private.

Dwayne: Well, General Guffaw, if it weren't for you, we wouldn't have to.

Jared: Yes?

Dwayne: Hello, Mrs. Allison. Here's the calendar you ordered.

John Avery Whittaker (Whit): Oh my, daughter daughter delivery. Oh, well, thank you very much, boys.

Dwayne: You're welcome, ma'am.

Jared: Hey, cheer up. Only 52 houses to go. Wait a minute. Did you see that?

Dwayne: What?

Jared: Those garbage men. They aren't the same garbage men we usually have. In fact, I've never seen them before in my life. Do you think they're really garbage men? I've heard that the FBI dresses their agents up as

Dwayne: Jared.

Jared: What's wrong? I was only saying

Dwayne: Forget it. Just forget the whole thing.

Jared: Fine. But I'll bet Mrs. Allison is the leader of the entire plot.

Dwayne: That does it.

Jared: What? What are you doing? Hey, what's that?

Dwayne: Unbleached, all purpose, self-rising, flour. Dwayne, you won it.

Chris: It's easy to let our imaginations run away with us. We get so caught up in playing that we lose track of what's real and what's make believe. I'm sure you knew that Jared and Dwayne were being silly and how they reacted to the Secret Girls Club. But have you ever been so caught up in your own imagination that you thought people were saying or doing things they weren't really saying or doing? A lot of the time that happens when we react to things without knowing the full truth. Like Jared and Dwayne, we wind up looking pretty ridiculous when all is said and done.

Which is one reason why the Bible tells us to be wise as often as it does. Sure, we should use our imaginations and have fun, but we should also be wise about how we use our imaginations. Well, that's all for now. Don't forget, if you ever want to write to me, I'd love to hear from you. Our address is Adventures in Odyssey, Colorado Springs, Colorado 80995. Or in Canada, write to Box 9800, Vancouver, BC, V6B 4G3. And when you write, ask about how you can get your own copy of today's episode. It's called The Spy Who Bugged Me.

Adventures in Odyssey is a presentation of Focus on the Family. The Spy Who Bugged Me was written by John Billy and directed by Dave Arnold. Our production engineer was Mark Drury. And I'm Chris, hoping you'll join us again next time for more Adventures in Odyssey.