So Long Insecurity
By Allison Herrin

Monday, June 12, 2017

But when his brothers saw that their father loved him more than all his brothers, they hated him and could not speak peaceably to him. Genesis 37:4 NIV

Have you ever felt like that? Have you ever been so envious of another that you couldn’t speak to them or even hated them? I know I have. I believe this envy comes from a deep insecurity and has been the downfall of many women.

We compare ourselves to others, and it leads to jealousy and strife. The funny thing is it doesn’t hurt the other woman, it only hurts us.

In this particular Bible story, it says that Joseph was loved by his father more than any of his brothers. While that in and of itself is inherently wrong, it caused his brothers to become envious of him.

So much so that they plotted to kill him but eventually just sold him into slavery instead. They simply couldn’t handle their emotions and the envy turned to bitterness.

I remember the day she started on the job. She was ten years older than me and more beautiful than any woman I had ever seen. And her personality… well let’s just say she lit up the room when she entered.

People gathered around her the minute she walked in and she was always the center of attention.

Admittedly I kept her at arm’s distance, quietly coveting her life; and sometimes not so quietly. I wanted to be the center of attention. I wanted to be loved the way others loved her; probably not far different than the envy that was in the hearts of Joseph’s brothers.

I let this go on for about a year or so until I finally had enough. I didn’t want to feel this way about her or myself any longer. I asked her to meet with me and told her exactly what I had been dealing with. She was shocked, and so was I.

She embraced me, told me she loved me and that she had some of the same feelings of envy toward me. Really? This woman who had everything, envied me? What I learned was her life was just as messy as mine, and in reality she was not far different from me at all.

Unfortunately many women struggle with this very same thing. We have deep insecurities that motivate us to do some crazy, irrational things.

We keep people at arm’s distance or maybe behave even worse than that because they are prettier, wealthier, thinner, or a whole host of comparisons that are specific to each of us individually.

In the end, this woman became one of my best friends. Had I allowed my insecurities to define who I was, I would have missed out on one of the greatest friendships I have ever known.

What about you? What insecurities are unique to you and how are they keeping you from God’s best? Will you agree with me to combat the lies and believe the truth instead? The truth is that God, the Creator of the universe and all of its beauty and majesty, created you in His image.

He loves you just the way you are. There is a unique plan just for you, and there is not a thing about you that He would change or do differently!

Choosing to say so long to insecurity will change you from the inside out. Your relationships change, your ministry changes, and even the way you see yourself changes, all for God’s glory!

Here are a few things you can do to keep insecurity from seizing your thoughts:

1)   Get some index cards and your Bible. On one side write the following statements. On the other side write out the corresponding Scriptures:

a)    I am beautiful (on 3 different cards) – Ecclesiastes 3:11, Psalm 45:11, Isaiah 61:3

b)   I am unique – Genesis 1:27

c)    I am loved – Jeremiah 31:3, John 15:9, 1 John 4:9-11

2)   This is one of my favorite things to do. Write with lipstick, of course, on your bathroom mirror: “I am loved”, “I am beautiful”, “I am unique”, “I am chosen” and a whole host of other things that God says about you. Write a new one every week and say it out loud to yourself as you are getting ready in the mornings. Eventually you might just believe it.

3)   Study the Word. This is the only way to hide it in your heart so that you can use it to combat the lies at any time.

Thank You Lord that You love me just the way I am. Show me more of that love and allow me to see myself and others the way You do. I agree to combat the lies that lead to insecurity, and I choose to break down the walls of envy. Thank You that Your strength alone sustains me and heals me.  In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

© 2017 by Allison Herrin. All rights reserved.

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