What Kind of Stepgrandparent Are You?
June 20, 2017
00:00
So, what kind of stepgrandparent are you?
You might not be one but the odds are someone in your family will be. There are three kinds: long-term stepgrandparents raised a stepchild and then became a grandparent when their stepchild had a kid. Inherited stepgrandparents inherited grandchildren when their adult son or daughter became a stepparent. And later-life stepgrandparents married a grandparent and instantly got stepgrandchildren. No matter what, it’s up to all three generations to act in loving ways and build a relationship.
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Blended & Blessed® is the only one-day live event and livestream just for stepfamily couples, dating couples with kids, and those who care about blended families. Join sites around the globe on April 27th, 2024 as we unpack strategies that are crucial to building unity in your stepfamily. With some of today’s most trusted and respected experts, Blended & Blessed will challenge, inspire, and encourage you.
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Do you know how to win friends and influence people? It might not be with you think.
We’ve lost the art of persuasion. We resort to loud declarations and a pushy attitude in politics, in sports and sometimes at home. Proverbs 25:15 suggests a more powerful approach. Patience can persuade a ruler, it says, and soft speech powerful enough to break a bone. No, we’re not trying to hurt someone. The point is, gentleness and kindness might not be quick but the outcome is significant. For example, a pushy stepparent is easily dismissed but a tender leader might find he has a following.
June 19, 2017
Would you like to make Father’s Day a great day for your dad? Get along!
There are times we need to work through family conflicts. But there are other occasions when we should set them aside. Friends of mine had a special occasion celebrating the dad in the family. Now, it was a blended family so when the adult children showed up they got territorial and before you know it the occasion was ruined. One of the greatest gifts you can give a parent is peace. Get along! Set aside your insecurities for a minute and celebrate dad this weekend. And let him take a nap!
June 16, 2017
Yo, Dude. Hey, slow down. Have some tact, okay.
We guys are natural fixers. Well, sometimes fixing requires tact and timing. Imagine a new stepdad who is trying to be accepted and find his place in the home. If he comes in like a bull in a china shop something fragile is bound to get broken. So, don’t force your way in, right every wrong, or conquer every mountain. Consult with your wife about her kids and work with her. Move in with tact, respect, patience, and lots of prayer. That’s how things get done.
June 15, 2017
Can you imagine at your wedding expressing vows to someone other than your groom or bride?
Maybe you saw the online video that went viral, it includes a groom expressing vows to his bride—and to her daughter. This stepdad-to-be knew that marrying a single parent means marrying the entire package—which in this case, included a young girl. He promised to play games with her, love her, and show her how a man should treat a woman by the way he treated her mother. Right from the start this girl was assured her stepdad was committed to her. We all need to hear that stepfamilies included.
June 14, 2017
“You see, Ron, I think I destroyed his dreams.”
A stepdad said, “When I married my stepson’s mother, I destroyed his dream of his parents getting back together.” Yes, because many kids of divorce do hold onto that dream it’s really hard when their parent marries. And that explains why the boy wasn’t welcoming to the stepdad. For a long time. The stepdad’s realization helped soften his heart toward his stepson and in time they found their way to each other. Dreams do die hard. And then sometimes, new dreams begin.
June 13, 2017
Is your church kid sensitive or out of touch?
A teacher gave the option of making two Christmas gifts so the kids wouldn't have to choose between mom's or dad's house. She gathered supplies for two gifts but another teacher in her grade thought that was too much trouble. Is your children’s ministry like the first teacher or the second? Do you have a curriculum that makes kids feel left out when they can’t be there each week? Our free tip sheet on ministering to students in stepfamilies can help your church stay kid sensitive and relevant.
June 12, 2017
The song “Respect” may have been made famous by Aretha Franklin, but the lyrics were written by a man!
Ladies, it may be true that the quickest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, but the best way to keep his heart is with your respect. Respect to a man communicates admiration and appreciation, both of which spell love. What does Paul tell wives to do in Ephesians 5 in the Bible? Well, he tells husbands to love their wives but he tells wives to respect their husbands. Find a way today to communicate respect to your husband. Thank him and tell him what you admire about him.
June 9, 2017
Okay, this is going to sound a little strange, but no; don’t try to be the knight in shining armor.
Romance novels and movies often characterize men as a knight who rides in and sweeps the woman off her feet and into wedded bliss. Many stepdads I know have also tried to fix all the wrongs for their stepchildren. I know it sounds strange but if you try to fix all the problems that other people have created, people may end up turning on you. Come alongside the kids, stepdad, embrace them and try to be a steady, positive influence over time—not the knight in shining armor. Just love them.
June 8, 2017
Yellow flashing lights mean proceed with caution.
Christine’s 16-year-old daughter was having emotional difficulties, but Christine’s boyfriend wasn’t very patient. In fact, he blamed her for keeping them from getting married. Even though Christine was in love and felt their “coupleness” was a good fit I suggested there was a huge flashing yellow light in front of her. He’s not mindful of your daughter. "Familyness” yellow lights should bring caution to “coupleness.” Your kids need you to slow down and make sure the light isn’t turning red.
June 7, 2017
Parents, you’ve got to role with the changes.
A biological parent’s role changes over time. As a child matures we shift from telling young children, to teaching adolescents, to delegating or coaching young adults. A stepparent’s role might shift from being a babysitter to being an aunt or uncle, to being a bonus parent. Later life stepparents likely start and finish in a friend or mentor role with their adult stepchildren. How your role changes depends on a lot and it can be confusing. Let us help with the changing roles of stepparenting.
June 6, 2017
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Blended & Blessed®
Blended & Blessed® is the only one-day live event and livestream just for stepfamily couples, dating couples with kids, and those who care about blended families. Join sites around the globe on April 27th, 2024 as we unpack strategies that are crucial to building unity in your stepfamily. With some of today’s most trusted and respected experts, Blended & Blessed will challenge, inspire, and encourage you.