Is dating that beneficial? According to pastors Gerald Hiestand and Jay Thomas, not really. For Hiestand and Thomas, the activity of going on a date isn't a problem, but too many people use the dating relationship to justify their sexual activity, as if "being in a relationship" makes promiscuity okay. Instead of dating, they encourage singles to establish dating friendships, getting to know someone gradually over time, and then making their intentions of marriage known before beginning to date exclusively.